The Importance of Walking

manning

Just for that I have requested it
Joined
Feb 12, 2002
Messages
13,353
Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.

My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where he is.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

The only reason I would take up walking is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing..

I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there.

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

I do have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, he looks good doesn't he.'

If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

I know I got a lot of exercise the last few years,....... just getting over the hill.

We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Every time I start thinking too much about how I look, I just find a Happy Hour and by the time I leave, I look just fine.
 
Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.

My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where he is.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

The only reason I would take up walking is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing..

I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there.

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

I do have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, he looks good doesn't he.'

If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

I know I got a lot of exercise the last few years,....... just getting over the hill.

We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Every time I start thinking too much about how I look, I just find a Happy Hour and by the time I leave, I look just fine.

:confused3:confused3:confused3
 
Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.

Ah well, there goes your inheritance. ;)
 

Steven Wright? One of my very favorite dead-pan comedians....

funny stuff
 
How about this one:
The doctor gave me 6 months to live then handed me the bill. I told him I couldn't pay. He gave me another 6 months.

-- Henny Youngman
 
I agree: sometimes the best humor is that which needs to be read twice and thought about a little.

I also agree that the 'confused' icon should be ousted. Seems like everytime I try a bit of humor my response is met with a crowd of :confused3

It sorta reminds me of a television show a few years back. At the end of the show they gave out a phone number for people to call and register one of three options about some stated opinion: "I Agree"; "I Disagree", or "I Don't Know". One dollar per call. We were to tune in the next week to see the results.

I forget what the issue was. All I recall is that some 35 percent 'agreed', another 30 percent 'disagreed', and the remaining 35 percent of callers 'didn't know'.

So people were calling this phone number, and having a dollar charged to their bill, to hit the "I don't know" button? Hmm. :confused3:confused3:confused3
 















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