The Hangout Thread ~ The Teen Board Common Room

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36. Illinois

The Land of Lincoln is the beating heart of America, a place you stop in on your way to somewhere else but end up staying in forever.

The Good: Chicago! The Goodman! Steppenwolf! Improv Olympic! Second City! Chicago is, weirdly, America's theater town, a place where important, meaty works of theater and comedy are created. Chicago also has bonkers-good food (they put bacon in their pancakes!) and is very beach-accessible, even if said beach is a weirdo pretend fake-ocean. Outside of the Windy City (named so for the politicians, not for the wind, dope) there is picturesque farmland, the perfect John Hughesian suburbs of the north shore, and the surprisingly stirring Lincoln homestead in Springfield.

The Bad: Illinois is corrupt as ----. Remember this guy? And, like, every governor and mayor before him? And once you step outside of the surprisingly stirring Lincoln homestead, you're in ------- Springfield, which is a perfect example of what happens to a town when no one pays any attention to it for fifty years. There's also the creeping inferiority complex that runs through Chicago. Chicagoans are often a little too eager to defend their city against New York or Los Angeles. Stop it, Chicago! You're trying too hard. Just do you, girl. Just do you. (Look to Pittsburgh for a lesson on how to do this beautifully.) Mostly, though, Illinois sucks because it's pretty ----ing cold in the winter.
Final Score: 6.3
 

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