The Duggar Family

[badblackpug]

I get that people have opinions. no biggie for me. i just see it as a conversation.

You are right, you can hide a lot. However, I think that these kids have been exposed to the world more than most in the course of making this show. Abuse could certainly be occurring. But I don't think that there is fighting, etc. That is the type of thing that is difficult to hide from everyone. If the kids were brats, and mom was a screaming nut it would get out, in other words.

Oh me too! As my hub always says, "no worries, babe!"

I just find it interesting that here on the DIS, and this is not limited to just this topic, I have seen it in many others, that some people think that if you disagree with them that you are insulting or judging them. You should have seen the DVC thread. It, basically, boiled down to "you think I'm an idiot spendthrift if I own DVC" or "You are low class low rent if you don't."

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

Oh me too! As my hub always says, "no worries, babe!"

I just find it interesting that here on the DIS, and this is not limited to just this topic, I have seen it in many others, that some people think that if you disagree with them that you are insulting or judging them. You should have seen the DVC thread. It, basically, boiled down to "you think I'm an idiot spendthrift if I own DVC" or "You are low class low rent if you don't."

lol, so are you a spendthrift or a low life?I personally am a lowlife...you might not want to talk with me anymore...

 

[Luvchefmic]

lol, so are you a spendthrift or a low life?I personally am a lowlife...you might not want to talk with me anymore...

no worries you have plenty of company we'll still talk to you

 

[Disney Ella]

Yup Michelle is sitting on the couch eating bon bons while her kids are slaving away.

Where did you see that they do all the work? The whole family pitches in and helps out. That's what happens in large families.

I never got the impression that Anna was "chosen". Josh did court another young lady before Anna to begin with. That didn't work out.

And by the way Anna has post secondary education. And she works outside the home at their business.

So what exactly is Michelle doing? Specific girls are assigned to the cooking and laundry and they all help clean up. What does Michelle do? I have never seen her involved as the main participant in any household activity. Directing, yes, but not actively participating.

Does Anna have a real four-year degree from an accredited university that would allow her to get a job or is it a degree from an online Gothard-approved school? Of course Anna works with Josh. Wives are subject to their husband's authority and are expected to work for their husbands if help is needed in the family business. Getting a job working for an unrelated person is an entirely different matter. Even men in the Gothard movement are discouraged from working for anyone else because that person may not hold the same religious beliefs.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

no worries you have plenty of company we'll still talk to you

schwooo! Glad to hear that! I'd hate to be here all alone!

Regarding Anna's job, who cares where she works? Would you suggest that other family businesses are based on subjection? How silly. In this economic climate, one is lucky to have a job. To have one working with my best friend and partner for life would be the dream job for me. Even with a "good enough" education I'd quit in a day and do paperwork to have that opportunity.

I don't know if you have ever run a large group, but just because you delegate does not mean that you are not doing anything!

 

[badblackpug]

lol, so are you a spendthrift or a low life?I personally am a lowlife...you might not want to talk with me anymore...

"No worries, babe!"

We're lowlifes, too!

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

"No worries, babe!"

We're lowlifes, too!

etd: lol, decided i might be blacklisted by my post!

 

[Luvchefmic]

You know all this hoopla about the Duggars has had me thinking of the book and the original movie someone here will know "Yours Mine and Ours" maybe ? based on the book "Who gets the drumstick?" I'm referring to how a very large family runs with military precision to get things done....in fact I think the husband was military...everyone has assigned chores/duties and its "normal" (I despise that word) for them

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

You know all this hoopla about the Duggars has had me thinking of the book and the original movie someone here will know "Yours Mine and Ours" maybe ? based on the book "Who gets the drumstick?" I'm referring to how a very large family runs with military precision to get things done....in fact I think the husband was military...everyone has assigned chores/duties and its "normal" (I despise that word) for them

lucille ball and henry fonda? I never knew it was based on a book.

 

[Luvchefmic]

lucille ball and henry fonda? I never knew it was based on a book.

yes that's it ..the book was a true story and then the movie was based on that I'll have to see what year all of it was I'm the oldest of 5 and it made such an impression on me I think because we always seemed so disorganized

This would have kept me up all night...NOW I remember ...interesting: she was a nurse married to a USN man & the 2nd marriage was also...well go read ;-)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helen_Beardsley

 

[princessmom29]

I'm also amazed how the Duggars provokes such emotions from people. I think it comes down to a couple of basic things:

1. Can they provide and take care of their children? (Yes, and they seem to do it well).
2. Do they judge others for the way they raise their families? (No, they just know what they want and how they want to raise their children, which is their right).

Do I believe in all the things they do? No. However, they respect others way of living so I can't help but respect them more just for this alone. I admire their patience and the kids all seem well adjusted and happy. Why does the Duggars provoke such strong emotions? Sometimes I think a small part of it is because people may envy them in small ways, their faith is strong, their work ethic is strong, their patience is abundant....if you don't agree with their lifestyle that is COMPLETELY your right, but until they expect everyone to foot the bill for their choices in life or start to neglect and mistreat their children this is NOBODIES business. They are happy, let them be.

They most certianly DO judge others who don't believe the way they do. Thoer children are not allowed to have friends outside thier belief system, Taht is certianly a judgment passed. They have also stated that anyone who uses any type of family planning is acting contrary to God's will.

I personally think that they ARE alreadt mistreating thier children, especially the older ones. They have NO choices at all anyomore, and are basically slave labor. The girls have NO opportunity at all for a way out ofthat lifestyle becuase they have no education. They have no hope of ever being independent.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

yes that's it ..the book was a true story and then the movie was based on that I'll have to see what year all of it was I'm the oldest of 5 and it made such an impression on me I think because we always seemed so disorganized

This would have kept me up all night...NOW I remember ...interesting: she was a nurse married to a USN man & the 2nd marriage was also...well go read ;-)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helen_Beardsley

Reserved! Thanks. I love a good book.

 

[princessmom29]

Where do you get that at all? You can't make that assumption from a few minutes of edited television?

Michelle is home all day most days with the children. They appear to have a lot of time with her.

I have read text from several interviews that wre given before they became as media savvy as they are now. They reveal a LOT about the Duggars that no one sees now. She basically assigns a baby to an older sister as soon as a new one comes along. She is no longer responsible for that child's daily care. The babies are also blanket trained, which she wiil deny doing now, but she explained the method in an early interview. The babies are taught never to venture off a blanket on the floor, using a switch. She siad that you can leave them there for a couple of hours and they will never move! Doesn't sound like anyone is getting quality time to me. More like they are pigeon holed until it is convinent.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

They most certianly DO judge others who don't believe the way they do. Thoer children are not allowed to have friends outside thier belief system, Taht is certianly a judgment passed. They have also stated that anyone who uses any type of family planning is acting contrary to God's will.

I personally think that they ARE alreadt mistreating thier children, especially the older ones. They have NO choices at all anyomore, and are basically slave labor. The girls have NO opportunity at all for a way out ofthat lifestyle becuase they have no education. They have no hope of ever being independent.

Lol, I am pretty sure Miss Jinger has figured out there is education available in the outside world. No one is chained to the bed post.

 

[princessmom29]

They are doing much more than "helping out," those girls prepare all the meals, do all the laundry and homeschool the younger children. Helping out is folding clothes or putting away the dishes. Just because a family doesn't choose to follow the Duggar's fundamental ways does not mean that the children are playing endless video games or sexting. Plenty of us have children who get good grades, help around the house and participate in community organizations even though they aren't strictly controlled like the Duggars.

Anna was chosen for Josh only after Jim Bob approved of the match. If Jim Bob hadn't approved, there would have been no marriage. It wasn't as if Josh got to go out into the world and meet young women and independently choose a wife. There was a very small pool of acceptable women to choose from - all of them from families that embrace the Gothard/Quiverfull lifestyle.

You are exactly right. Teh girls`do all the work and the marriage was arranged out of a small pool of acceptable choices. That was made very clear in the episodes where they were first "dating" Jim Bobsaid that they have to work hard to find "acceptable families" for the children to socialize with. They are not allowed anything but the most csual association with anyone woho desn't ahare thier beliefs.

 

[disneymama83]

I have read text from several interviews that wre given before they became as media savvy as they are now. They reveal a LOT about the Duggars that no one sees now. She basically assigns a baby to an older sister as soon as a new one comes along. She is no longer responsible for that child's daily care. The babies are also blanket trained, which she wiil deny doing now, but she explained the method in an early interview. The babies are taught never to venture off a blanket on the floor, using a switch. She siad that you can leave them there for a couple of hours and they will never move! Doesn't sound like anyone is getting quality time to me. More like they are pigeon holed until it is convinent.

Just curious, have you ever used a playpen for your children?

 

[princessmom29]

Lol, I am pretty sure Miss Jinger has figured out there is education available in the outside world. No one is chained to the bed post.

Not literally but figuratively yes they are. How would one of those girls actually support herself if she chose to leave that family? Her only real choice would be fast food or a grocery store. Minimum wage. You cannot live on minimum wage with no help from anyone, especially with a woefully laking education and no real world experience. Yes, they are free to leave at any time, but have absolutely no means to do so. There are so many holes in the Gothard homeschool curricilium they use, plus the fact that girls are only taught what is essential to run a home. They are taught from day one that they CANNOT do anything but be a wife and mother, they are not prepared for anything but being married off. They are effectively chained to that lifestyle. read the biographies of some of the women who have left the FLDS church. They are totally dependent and it is almost impossible to get out. This is the same sort of dependence.

 

[Luvchefmic]

Oh good grief this will go on until the world ends.(and how that will happen will be a debate in itself) .there isn't a religion or household in the world that someone won't agree/disagree with how things are done right?

May they all live healthy happy lives

 

[princessmom29]

Just curious, have you ever used a playpen for your children?

no. I hate the things. I also never hit my child with a switch ,so no I do not blaket or playpen train. Even those that use playpens take the child out if they are visibly upset and want to come out. Blanket trained children are left for hours on end, and hit if they cry.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

lol, do you know any people who actually live like this? I do. I know 2nd and 3rd generation families. Their children are not scarred, they are taught the skills to get by, allowed to go to college, even if they are women, God forbid, and they are relatively happy people.It would be great if the rest of the world were so. You believe far too much of what you read, especially if it supports your biases.

Actually I know 2nd and 3rd generation families like this. Less dysfunction than the average.