Sorry this is OT, but I couldn't resist with Kate's comment about trolls. When DH and I had just purchased our first home, we had a flood about 3 days after closing. Our basement was almost totally destroyed. Well, we got things cleaned up and fixed and DH was ready to paint. He found some great stuff called KILZ that would kill any mold spores as well as be a paint. Or so we thought. DH masked the entire basement off in plastic, with all the windows sealed shut, then he went to work spraying that stuff all over the walls. After about 30 minutes I had a headache from smelling the stuff and I was upstairs. I went down to convince DH to take a break and get out of the fumes for a while. He had literally gone crazy. He was hallucinating and even started to attack me. I locked myself in the bedroom and called 911. They came and got DH in an ambulance and to the hospital. The fire chief came and assessed the situation, and then calmly walked over to our neighbor and told him to put out his cigarette as there was enough flammable fumes in the air to blow the entire neighborhood to Kingdom Come. What fun, huh? We'd only lived in the house 3 days and this was how we met most of our neighbors.
Later I talked to DH at the hospital and he told me that he was seeing trolls in the basement and they were out to get him. That's why he was attacking anything that moved, me included. It sounds funny now, but it was scary then. Now, I give him a troll in his Christmas stocking every year. Hee, hee.
Ok, back to your regularly scheduled hilarity.
I do love her English sayings. So keep them coming Clare.
does he not realise we're busy too - trying to post?? 
I'll give you a gold star and 5 points to get you started...
(I wanted the one with the hair but can't find it 
