the boys and girls thread

[DisIm]

9-yr-old Joey was asked by his mother what he learnt in Sunday School.

"well Mum, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge, and all the people walked across safely. Then he used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters and call in an air strike. They sent in bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved."

"Now Joey, is that REALLY what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked.

"Well, no Mum. But if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it."

Okay so
that really wasn't
that funny
but probably only because
i fail to see the humour
in religious
humour.

 

[jbcheerchick93]

i really really really do not like my computer!

for some reason i really it doesnt want to co-opetate with me!

AUGH

 

[marypops!]

-_- You very religious?

How about this?

Bill Clinton was going to have a state dinner, but his normal chef was ill so they got a replacement. He didn't like how the chef was handling the food but decided to ignore it. Throughout the meal, he started feeling ill. He excused himself and went to try to find a bathroom. When passing the kitchen he saw the chef scratch himself and it made him feel worse. He was ill and disoriented and couldn't remember the door to the bathroom. He was about to pass out but he found an unlocked door. He undid his trousers and went in. Soon, he realised he was in Monica Lewinsky's office with his trousers round his knees. Just before he passed out, she leaned over him and heard him say...

"sack my cook"

and that's how the misunderstanding occured.

 

[DisIm]

-_- You very religious?

How about this?

Bill Clinton was going to have a state dinner, but his normal chef was ill so they got a replacement. He didn't like how the chef was handling the food but decided to ignore it. Throughout the meal, he started feeling ill. He excused himself and went to try to find a bathroom. When passing the kitchen he saw the chef scratch himself and it made him feel worse. He was ill and disoriented and couldn't remember the door to the bathroom. He was about to pass out but he found an unlocked door. He undid his trousers and went in. Soon, he realised he was in Monica Lewinsky's office with his trousers round his knees. Just before he passed out, she leaned over him and heard him say...

"sack my cook"

and that's how the misunderstanding occured.

Not super crazy religious but I don't like that sort of joke....

Or the one posted above, although, it was funnier than the Moses one. But my dad met Bill Clinton so.. not so funny really.

 

[jbcheerchick93]

ohmygod george that was so funny! i'm literally laughing out loud.

and yes, i am one of the girls that loves a good dirty joke, it just cracks me up!

 

[marypops!]

That's british humour for you...

There's not many clean jokes in the book, and the ones that are clean, are extremely long -_-

The only one I can think of is:

The Catholic Church is bringing out a new low fat communion wafer called "I can't believe it's not Jesus"

 

[DisIm]

Come to think of it,

I don't really like British humour so specifically at all.

In fact,

I hated Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
Especially the part where the guy goes in the castle with all the girls.
=\

 

[jbcheerchick93]

georgie, do you wait on the thread until someone else posts?? cause y'know what?? i do that sometimes, i wait until someone says something so that i dont feel wierd posting twice.


omgsh if this offended you im so sorry!! i just realized that it might, but im still curious

 

[marypops!]

Not really. I refresh alot

I seem to post after every one because... I don't know... it takes a while to type out these jokes...

I have bed now -_-

 

[shellybellypolo]

That's british humour for you...

There's not many clean jokes in the book, and the ones that are clean, are extremely long -_-

The only one I can think of is:

The Catholic Church is bringing out a new low fat communion wafer called "I can't believe it's not Jesus"

!

 

[lpe_bratz]

night george.

 

[jbcheerchick93]

hahaha

NIGHT GEORGE!

 

[jbcheerchick93]

OoOoOoOo i believe that you two were LURKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

come out come out wherever you girls are!!

 

[PowerMonkey]

whoa whoa whoa... you guys dont like south park? haha, i love that show

 

[lpe_bratz]

Mom-e!!

 

[DisGirlAllie]

whoa whoa whoa... you guys dont like south park? haha, i love that show

It's OK.
Not a fan but I don't hate it.

 

[PowerMonkey]

lol i see i see.... well my humor is pretty messed up haha... i find offensive things funny (as long as its done in a joking manner) ... i have field days with "yo mamma battles" lol.. oh, and really dumb things amuse me... luckily, south park is made of both

 

[DisGirlAllie]

lol i see i see.... well my humor is pretty messed up haha... i find offensive things funny (as long as its done in a joking manner) ... i have field days with "yo mamma battles" lol.. oh, and really dumb things amuse me... luckily, south park is made of both

Yo mamma battles are pretty hillarious.
Especially with my guy-friends.

 

[DisIm]

I'll stay out of here

until the topic changes

 

[lpe_bratz]

^^

with you there.