Telling a bride you think she looks fat 2 weeks before her wedding...

[disneyberry]

*angry*

OMG, I sent my family pictures of my 3rd dress fitting, and today, my mom had the nerve to attempt to tell me that she + my dad think I look fat!!

She starts to say "Why don't you do some arm exercises everyday for the next few weeks?"

I immediately knew what she's getting at... and became absolutely flabbergasted!

W T F.

Sorry just had to rant about the ridiculousness of it all. I'm like the most petite girl ever too. *sigh* It's amazing I never had an eating disorder growing up with parents who think all girls should be skinny like supermodels.

I'm already under so much stress already (totally had the WORST nightmare last night about it being the morning of the wedding, and I'd missed the dress steaming appointment, my dress + everyone's tuxes were a wrinkled mess, and plus I had no idea what I was doing for the first dance choreography LOL)... Jeez.

Okay I was trying to stop ranting, but went on some more. Anyway! *Big sigh* Moving on...

 

[ElleBren]

That is really not nice, I would have died if my mom said that to me. However she was probably thinking that but did not voice it.

Don't let it bother you, I'm sure you look fantastic!!

Here are some mom blockers


plus some extra pairs in case you lose them.

 

[Lynn5700]

aww that's just messed up! Sorry!!

 

[alissa2008]

Sorry dear. Don't let them get to you - this is your day, you have every right to feel special and beautiful... just ignore them - they don't know anything! You should post some pics from your fitting - we'd love to see your gown!

 

[orangetiggs]

I really would not worry about it!! I tried to lose weight and lost 14 lbs but not as much as I wanted. On the day nothing mattered and I had back fat but it didnt bother me as I was marrying the man i loved and he loves me the way i am.

You just have to think you are marrying the man you love, take no notice of anyone else

 

[CoP Luv]

That is so awful!!! Don't worry about the nightmares. I had so many right before our wedding. I think in one, we were ready to walk down the aisle and I was still in my PJs with just my veil on. Or that my family saw another wedding at our hall (which is funny because we had booked our whole country club for ourselves) and decided the other wedding was more fun and wanted to go to that one.

 

[not_Joanna_eggs]

That's messed up. I'm becoming more and more convinced that there's something about weddings that makes mothers (well at least some) go a little crazy and loose all sense and reason.

I too have been having mom-drama, and the best advice ever was to just put on some , and just focus on your happy day - you're so close!

 

[agnes!]

*angry*

OMG, I sent my family pictures of my 3rd dress fitting, and today, my mom had the nerve to attempt to tell me that she + my dad think I look fat!!

She starts to say "Why don't you do some arm exercises everyday for the next few weeks?"

I immediately knew what she's getting at... and became absolutely flabbergasted!

W T F.

Sorry just had to rant about the ridiculousness of it all. I'm like the most petite girl ever too. *sigh* It's amazing I never had an eating disorder growing up with parents who think all girls should be skinny like supermodels.

I'm already under so much stress already (totally had the WORST nightmare last night about it being the morning of the wedding, and I'd missed the dress steaming appointment, my dress + everyone's tuxes were a wrinkled mess, and plus I had no idea what I was doing for the first dance choreography LOL)... Jeez.

Okay I was trying to stop ranting, but went on some more. Anyway! *Big sigh* Moving on...

"Gee, Mom, that was really helpful - your comment made me feel special, thanks ever so much. And by the way, people always tell me I look just like you."

agnes!

 

[pixie dust 112]

 

[disneyberry]

lol, thanks for the all the encouragement ladies!

I'm still kind of reeling from it, spent all night last night wondering if I can make myself some sort of cap sleeves to cover up my so-called "fat" LOL

Mothers have such a way of knowing exactly how to make you feel like crap sometimes, don't they? *sigh*

I'll try to make a good wedding report of everything (with dress pics and all other details etc) after it's all done and I'm home from WDW. Things are just so crazy, I thought about making a PJ but I just didn't think I'd have time for it. (Not to mention I'm mostly a very shy person, except for occasional outbursts when I need to suddenly rant about some personal problem haha!)

 

[chancecaught]

Wow, I'm sorry that your parents weren't exactly what I'd call supportive. Don't let it get to you and no worries, you'll look lovely on your day!

 

[perla75]

You should ask your mom to see what she looks like in her dress & give her a little "constructive criticism"

Uggh, my parents are the SAME way so I totally understand Like you dont have enough to feel stressed about with all the planning...I'm so sorry you had to go through that. No one deserves that

Don't worry about it & if your parents are continuing to be critical or make you feel bad, I would start giving yourself a little space between them to allow you to focus on YOU. I am sure you look fine & you will look beautiful in your dress

 

[Beep]

Oh I'm so with you on this!

My Mom bought me some cotton trousers years ago when we went to India and said 'I've bought you a bigger size because, I'm sorry to say, I didn't think your legs would fit in your usual size."

She has come out with numerous comments over the years and eventually I asked her outright if she was embarrassed that I was fat. After a very frank and honest discussion, she is much more tactful now. I am now a UK16 which I think is a US14, but I used to be a UK22. Ok, that was big but still, no need for comments like that. My Mom is very petite (5'3" and a UK8/10) and I think it bothers her that I'm not as her size the single most important thing in her life.

You need to ignore what she said. Whether you are petite or not, you will feel like a million dollars on your wedding day in your dress and like orangetiggs said, you are marrying the man of your dreams. That's what is important.

I have been a UK10 up to a UK22 and my long-suffering man is still with me and loves me more than ever. I would love to be a size 10 again but it 'aint gonna happen so I'm being realistic. Size 16 and a man that adores me - works for me

 

[figureskater]

I know that your fiance thinks that you are the most gorgeous thing he has ever seen. All your friends are going to see what a beautiful bride you are. All of us here are going to see how fantastic you look in your wedding photos. Don't stress, your mom is probably stressing and that's why she said that. Just enjoy the rest of your wedding planning and the big day!




love the mom blockers lol

 

[JonetteA]

You are the perfect size that you need to be for yourself. As long as you are happy with yourself and your fiancee is definately happy what does it matter!

Just hang in there and it is going to be perfect.

 

[KittyKat08]

*angry*

OMG, I sent my family pictures of my 3rd dress fitting, and today, my mom had the nerve to attempt to tell me that she + my dad think I look fat!!

She starts to say "Why don't you do some arm exercises everyday for the next few weeks?"

I immediately knew what she's getting at... and became absolutely flabbergasted!

W T F.

Sorry just had to rant about the ridiculousness of it all. I'm like the most petite girl ever too. *sigh* It's amazing I never had an eating disorder growing up with parents who think all girls should be skinny like supermodels.

I'm already under so much stress already (totally had the WORST nightmare last night about it being the morning of the wedding, and I'd missed the dress steaming appointment, my dress + everyone's tuxes were a wrinkled mess, and plus I had no idea what I was doing for the first dance choreography LOL)... Jeez.

Okay I was trying to stop ranting, but went on some more. Anyway! *Big sigh* Moving on...

I know how you feel and it's a horrible feeling. I used to be really thin and now well I have curves we shall say. My wedding is on Halloween this year and my dress is red and when I showed a picture of it to my mom she was not supportive at all. Basically said something along the lines of looking like a large tomato. I blew her off but it hurt, I'm waiting to see how she looks at the wedding and make sure I give her a great compliment. Don't worry about it, I'm sure you will look gorgeous and have a wonderful perfect wedding.

 

[29apr00]

*angry*


She starts to say "Why don't you do some arm exercises everyday for the next few weeks?"

And my reply to her would have been "Why don't you just not come if i'm so "not tone" for my dress??"

Seriously, your mother??? I couldn't say that to a total stranger, let alone my CHILD!!! I'm sorry your mother is such a piece of work. hopefully your dh lets you know everyday how beautiful you are!

 

[AbbyPan]

Oh beleive me, you are not the only one that has gone through this. At my first dress fitting my mom and sister were making faces everytime I tried on a dress and there were comments like, "Abby, you need to do something about this...(grabbing my love handles)"

After that, i was determined leave them completely out of the process. I went wedding shopping on my own and my mom barely saw what I chose until the very end. She claimed not to care, but I know she did, and it was her own fault. The thing is she will never change, even now she tells me, "have you been excersing?"

So, hang in there, ignore the comments and surround yourself with people who are positive! Many parents mean well but they forget that their criticisms are not constructive. They're more like destructive. Dont' let it get to you!!

 

[EpcotSweetHrts0512]

My mom is the same way!! "So, you've gained a few pounds, haven't you?" I mean really, don't our moms know that we are under so much stress without their "help"??

 

[keenercam]

I am so sorry your mother hurt you that way. I can relate but on a much more exaggerated scale. My mother told me they didn't make wedding gowns for girls as large as I was and she'd found a seamstress who could put panels of lace in the sides to make the dress that she bought in the largest size available fit, but that the seamstress needed to figure out how many yards to order.

When I tried on my gown for my vow renewal this Saturday and saw the gorgeous hourglass shape that the gown created, I thought of when my father told me at age 11 to put to "put on a God..m belt" because I had no waist and looked like a blob. It's amazing how the people who love us most think they can say hurtful, heartless things and profess to be doing it for our own good.

Please do not let anyone make you feel badly about yourself. You will be absolutely beautiful!