Teacher/Parent help

[hugabearjo]

HELP!!!! I am so upset and I really don't know what to do. Please someone help me. Am I a nieve parent or is this crossing the line.

I had my High School student come home and tell me tha this Health teacher told him that the basketball coach from last year won't be joining them this year because he is in Jail for raping a dead horse. It makes me sick just saying it. Then to add salt to it, come to find out it isn't true at all...... The teacher just made it up as a joke. This is a teacher that crossed the line more then once and I keep ignoring it.

I went to the principal just to make him aware of the situation and then the Teacher went to his Health class and said, " some parent had to complain about the Horse thing, they just can't take a joke"

Do I not have a since of humor? or is this crossing the line. I also found out today that the same teacher started a rumor about my son that he kicked him off the basketball team because he missed practice for a week before Christmas. He did miss because he was very very sick and was almost hospitalized but, they let me take him home because of my medical background. He isn't kicked off but, his team mates are surprised because the coach told them that he was.

Do I write a formal complaint like the principal asked me? I don't want to cause trouble but, I am struggling with this whole thing. Please please help me know what to do.

Thank you
Jo

 

[disneybound31]

When I was a high school student (in the 90's- I am 32 now) we had a Spanish teacher that repeatedly told off-color and sexual jokes and told many stories about his 'experiences' in the world. Some kids would laugh in an embarrassed way... some of us would just sit in shock knowing it made us uncomfortable, but what do you do when it is your teacher? Well, I finally got up enough nerve to tell my parents because the teacher had started 'picking' on some of the more quiet and more conservative students. Read: religious kids. My parents got together with a few other parents and went to the school management. Well, with tenure the teacher got no punishment, but I do think he got reprimanded because he made several comments like your child has reported... "Can't take a joke" "People need to lighten up" etc.

My advice is this-- you send your child to school to be educated and you pay for it whether private or public school. These are your tax dollars and this is your child. You should, no question, stand up for your child's right to be educated in an environment free of inappropriate conduct from adults. We have enough to worry about from the kids- we should not have to worry about immature adults. I would be the squeaky wheel and keep going there and calling every time this happens and try to enlist some support from another parent or two...

 

[mickeymouse1017]

I will give you my opinion not only as a parent, but as a teacher also. You MUST write a letter. This teacher cannot be allowed to get away with this. If he is doing this now and getting away with it, it will only get worse. It is very infuriating to work with people like this that make the rest of us look bad because they are so unprofessional. If the teacher chooses to make comments about the student's parents complaining, that should also be reported. And remember, after the principal, there is always the school board. I would not let this rest until the school puts a stop to it.

 

[Dakota_Lynn]

Rape, bestiality and necrophilia? All in one? Yeesh, that teacher sounds like one sick puppy.

Honestly, I hate to overreact about things, but I would be bugged if my daughter came home and told me that her teacher said that to her class. Rape is not a joke under any circumstance. If that makes me uptight, then so be it, but that is how I feel. There is no way such a violent, ugly thing can ever be funny, especially when directed to teenagers.

It's totally disgusting.

 

[FSUDisneyGirl]

I would write an official letter and send it to the principal, school board members, and superintendent. Maybe even the newspaper! Your principal may have his or her hands tied if this teacher has tenure, but if you go to higher levels, I believe things will be taken care of. I am a teacher too, and no student should have to listen deal with this gross behavior. I say, keep on moving up the chain until someone takes notice (and believe me, they will). Good luck!

 

[poohandwendy]

Do I write a formal complaint like the principal asked me? I don't want to cause trouble but, I am struggling with this whole thing. Please please help me know what to do.

Thank you
Jo

Why would you even think twice about this? Of course you write the formal complaint, why do you think the principal asked you to?

I wouldn't hesitate.

 

[poohandwendy]

Do I write a formal complaint like the principal asked me? I don't want to cause trouble but, I am struggling with this whole thing. Please please help me know what to do.

Thank you
Jo

Why would you even think twice about this? Of course you write the formal complaint, why do you think the principal asked you to?

I wouldn't hesitate.

 

[disykat]

Parent and teacher here also. I think you need to follow through on the complaint and encourage other parents to do the same. That's really not acceptable in any way, shape, or form.

Not only is it inappropriate, but it sounds like the former coach could suffer from those type of rumors. Talk about slander!

 

[momrek06]

Absolutely write the letter, OP. Teachers are role models to the youth of today. Telling sick jokes such as the horse one is just simply crossing the line, IMHO. Quite frankly, I am surprised it appeared you were the only one that complained about the sick joke.

 

[BC Disney Lover]

What the teacher is said is disgusting and totally inappropriate and you should write a formal complaint. I don't get offended easily and can joke about a lot of stuff but that's just gross. Also, the fact that your teenager came to you about this makes me think that he wants you to do something.

Good Luck!

 

[Aliceacc]

Another parent/ teacher here.

The principal is trying to start (or continue) a paper trail, to build a case against the teacher. That's why he needs it in writing, so it's not just hearsay.

Absolutely write the letter!! Otherwise this idiot will assume that what he's doing is OK.

 

[DawnM]

High school teacher and parent here too.....document, document, document....agreeing with all that has been said here. I would even write the second statement he said about a parent not being able to take a joke.

In many fields of work this would be considered sexual harassment!

This guy needs to be reprimanded!

Dawn

 

[bunny213]

I just recently retired after 27 years...and I will tell you this...
Do NOT hesitate to write and cc the report to the district - what this teacher did (and is doing is uncalled for and certainly not within his job description). I've seen hundreds of teachers in my time....your son, his fellow students, the school and the community does not need this person teaching your children. He needs to be brought to task.
Teachers like this enrage me! Barb

 

[rebecca314]

YIKES!!!! I am also a parent and HS teacher and this needs to be addressed! The fact that the teacher then brought it up in class shows how unprofessional he is. There is a lot of difficulty in removing a teacher and, as many others have said, a paper trail must be started. Do not let this lie ... it is not just for your kid but the other students as well.

I have made mistakes in my career and have found it beneficial to talk with my mentor and/ or administrator. Something like this, though, I don't believe is salvageable. Keep us updated!

 

[HopperFan]

Write the letter, especially since he asked you to. I remember MANY years ago when my brother was in @ 1st grade...my Mom was so upset because he teacher seemed so unprepared to be teaching. She sent my Mom a letter with about a dozen misspellings. My mother met the Principal, showed him the letter and got a "thank you very much", took the letter and didn't say a word. My Mom was still mad, feeling she had been dismissed.......shortly thereafter the teacher was replaced. Turns out the paperwork trail is the only thing that could resolve the problem. Their hands are tied without it. My Mom going in and having that note was the final item he needed to handle it. The Principal needs a paper trail to be able to do anything.

And my first thought about damage (because the kids will blow it off) is what about the poor basketball coach he is saying this about ? What if some kids spread the word, says something online where so much is public......it could severely damage his reputation and current job situation. This creates quite a larger problem. I really hope this is stopped in in it's tracks and he is fired. Maybe it will also send a message to all teachers that there is a line to what is funny....you don't damage others' reputations.

 

[trivial]

You're uncertain as to whether or not this is crossing a line? I also don't understand the hesitation, especially when the principal recommended writing a letter.

 

[2Princes2Princesses]

As a parent with a very off-color sense of humor, I think you should write letters to anyone you can.

That was NOT funny and made even LESS SO (if that is possible) by the fact that it was a teacher telling it to students.

I tend to have a dirtier/also darker sense of humor than most other people. As an adult, I know that I should have the good sense not to make certain jokes around certain people (my kids, my DH's stepmom, strangers, a HIGH SCHOOL CLASS).

That teacher crossed a BIG line. Don't hesitate.

 

[DisneyDotty]

That teacher is extremely unprofessional and an insult to the many dedicated people in the teaching profession. He should be removed. (BTW--tenure does not make it difficult to remove a poor-performing teacher who has violated the terms of his contract.)
Agree with all the PPs--document, document and document. And be aware that the general public (and most within the school) are not privy to matters of school personnel. The school may indeed be working towards removing this person from the classroom, but administrators are not allowed to discuss it. When I taught, one day a teacher was there--the next he wasn't. We never really knew what happened unless that teacher felt like telling us.
Good luck OP!

 

[JoyMouse]

I am also a teacher/parent...write the letter. That is what gives people in any profession bad names. I would not stand for it for my child and wouldn't expect anyone to leave me in a classroom if I were behaving that badly. That is terrible! Please write the letter.

 

[Snow Shoe]

Again as a teacher and parent write the letter! The comments are very unprofessional.