Taking the nieces? Complicated... Need feedback

[Earstou]

Personally, if I were you, I would only consider taking the older two at this time.

You have quite an age range there, and the teen isn't always going to want to do the same thing the 6 yr old wants to do. Plus, there might be rides the 6 yr old can't ride (my youngest is 16, so I don't remember how the height requirements affect a 6 yr old??). That means you and dh will be splitting up and not riding together sometimes.
Also getting a hotel room with 6 isn't easy on property (and budget!).

Lastly, I didn't see when you are planning on going. If it's during a school break (summer, Christmas, spring break), WDW will be crowded, and trying to keep a group of 6 together is hard.

I've found I prefer to travel to WDW with just my immediate family. Took my single dsil once, all she wanted was thrill rides, nothing else. She didn't see the magic and was bored. I didn't enjoy that trip because I kept worring about entertaining dsil.

 

[Wigit12]

We took DN when she was 4 and have never, EVER regretted it. One of our favorite trips ever. Had another SIL get snarky about it saying she'd never let her kids go to WDW for the first time without her. But the situation was simple. DN could go with us (for free) or never go at all. We knew my brother and SIL would never be able to take her. She's 11 now with divorced parents and still talks about our trip. I actually am trying to take her again.

At 4 I was very worried about missing her parents because she was very attached. We took two practice trips first. One overnight to the beach and then a 2 day weekend to get her ready. I would think with four kids though they would be much more comfortable since they have each other. DN did get homesick a couple of times (we went for 10 days!!) We made sure to call every couple of days. When she got a little sad, we went and picked out souveniers for Mom or Dad or found a "bribe" to distract her. All in all it went very well.

Now, 4 nieces is another story. I'd personally love it but DH would not have the patience at all. My son is 24 and I miss having kids at Disney. It's a whole different experience.

I would make sure your husband understands he can't refuse to ever go again if he doesn't like it with 4 girls around! Don't sell yourself short!!

It's a very selfless offer. I'd hope your sister will see it that way and not let her children miss this opportunity. Good luck!

 

[yoopermom]

Just to throw out another idea altogether: what about a cruise (or land/sea combo)? Cruises are so nice with kids of multiple ages, because there are kids clubs for each age going! So much to do, they can have a degree of independence, and you can get two rooms so you can still have some privacy.

Just an idea!

Terri

 

[ReneeA]

I wouldn't take your nieces on your first trip to WDW. Heck, I'm glad DH and I had a few trips under our belt prior to having our own children. It's a totally different experience that you aren't likely to have with the kids. Take them next year...after you've gotten a chance to experience and explore on your own first.

 

[CC12005]

What a wonderful idea. Whatever you decide to do, please keep us posted. Many here would be happy to know the outcome with no judgement.

 

[Perditamarie]

I think this is a very interesting thread, and I think you are very generous OP.

I agree w/Branv tho....this is your first trip, so there may be plenty you want to do that could get pushed aside if you are catering to 4 children. Which could be a lot more work than you are considering!! I say it is okay to be "selfish" and let this be a wonderful adventure for you and DH and then invite the kids when you are expert tour guides!

Please keep us updated!

 

[bushdianee]

I've taken 2 different nieces at 2 different times and ages to Disney. The younger one did way better! She was 2 1/2 and didn't even ask for her parents once during the week. The other was 12 almost 13 and was VERY homesick. Cried all the way there and every night. Poor thing also had a since infection while we were there so she was away from Mom and Dad for the first time and not feeling well. She claimed she had a good time but I'm not sure. The 2yo (she's 4 now) on the other hand is going back with me in June for her 2nd trip. I have her almost as much as her parents do so she is completely comfortable with me. Another aunt whom she is very close to is also definitly going and a 3rd aunt is possibly going.

 

[JenSop]

Hmmm... for your very first trip? I wouldn't do it. I would do a trip with just the two of you first to have the experience under your belt. Then take the nieces on a subsequent trip. I think it's an absolutely wonderful gesture that you want to do it, though.

However, if you wait to take them on a later trip, you'll have a better understanding of WDW and not be overwhelmed by a first time trip while dealing with four kids all at once.

Just my meager two cents.

We'll be taking our nieces with us in 2012, but my parents and grandmother will be coming as well. My sister and BIL haven't decided yet if they'll be coming, but at least I'll have my parents to help out with the two girls. I'm a Disney veteran and still feel a little apprehensive about taking them to the World. (And excited at the same time - )

Seriously, take your first trip just the two of you.

 

[ChickieToo]

I've taken my niece and nephew on vacation and it was great. We have one child and the three of them are very close, even though my nephew is 5 years older than his sister and seven years older than my DD.

Anyway, my DBil has had some business set backs, and money has been really tight for the last 5-6 years. We were going to Maine, and I knew both Dniece and Dnephew loved Maine when they had been their with their parents and grandparents during better times. DH and I wanted them to come, so I asked Dsis. She was happy to let them go. The kids had a blast, and when they returned my sister couldn't thank me enough saying things like her kids hadn't had a vacation in years and if it weren't for us they wouldn't have had one that year either. She looked like she might cry and I just brushed it off because I didn't want her to go one and on.

That was two summers ago. Last April we went to WDW and took Dniece with us. Nephew didn't want to go without his parents (I think he didn't want to leave his girlfriend), so she came without him. Again, total blast! This summer, it was Maine again and we had another great time. Just Sunday my niece said "where we were going on spring break?" My sister said they weren't going anywhere because they didn't have the money. She looked at my sister and said "not you, them," and pointed to us. We all just laughed. Certainly if we go somewhere, we will take her with us.

We are very close to my niece and nephew and they are very comfortable with us. We are a little stricter than their parents about manners and behavior, and when we have to set them straight, we do, then we move on. I think we are making memories that all the kids will carry with them.

I think you should take your nieces--all of them if they all want to go. It will be something they will always remember and your sister will appreciate it more than she can express.

 

[Lisa_M]

I too agree that for you first trip, you should go by yourselves. Disney World is really a great romantic place for 2 adults. There will always be time later to take the kids.

 

[Holly79]

Thanks to everyone for such wonderful responses!! Y'all are great! There is such a range of things I never would have even though of!

The thought of splitting up the kids two by two did cross my mind, however I'd rather not do that for a couple of reasons. First of all, they are very close and on the rare occasion one or two aren't able to attend an outing with us, all I hear about is how much Ashley would have loved this, and Autumn would have loved that. I don't mind a bit cause I think it's so sweet, but they really miss each other when they're not together.

Another reason I would hate to split them up is because there's just no way to know what the future holds. Heaven forbid something unexpected happen to prevent the second trip, be it health related, financial or otherwise. I'm by no means Miss Gloom and Doom, but after the recent death of one of my old high school friends due to a brain aneurysm, I certainly understand that nothing in this life is definite.

I also understand what everyone means about going alone the first time. I've definitely thought of that too, but my husband and I have already traveled across the US quite a bit. We've been super blessed and have had great times together, but I can't help feeling a little selfish. It's been all about us each time. I think it would be good for us to put ourselves second this time around.

Bran, you're correct, I have never traveled long distance with my nieces and completely agree that it could be chaos. You (and everyone else) brought up so many things to seriously think about.

And regarding my sister, we do have our differences, but we're close enough that she will tell me if she has any hesitations. I do remember a few years ago when my sister and her DH were going to Chicago for a weekend and we had the kids. I asked her if we could take them to a kids Ice Capades show and she agreed, but said she was really sorry she wouldn't be able to see their faces. (We took lots of pictures for her!)

I would never want to take the opportunity away from any parent to miss their kids faces at Disney World. I'm not even a parent but I can't imagine how difficult that might be. So now I'm considering an alternate solution. I originally wanted to stay onsite but my friend referred me to her Aunt and Uncle who rent out a vacation home they own in Orlando.

It's about 8 minutes away from DW and it has an in-ground pool, with a hot tub, 3 bedrooms and can comfortably fit up to 8 people. They usually rent it for $130 a night, but for us said they would do $80.00 a night since we're a direct referral. I'm not sure how practical it would be for us to stay off site, but with an arrangement like that, we'd certainly be cutting a bit off the cost of a resort stay, and could apply the difference to cover my sister and her DH. I'm hoping that if we completely cover the cost of the vacation home, maybe they could meet us half way on their plane tickets and admission passes. Again this all depends on their marital status at the time, but I will let my sister determine what's best for that route.

If they do definitely split, another idea I liked is maybe just my sister and I taking the girls. I don't see my DH objecting at all. He's really sweet when it comes to family problems. When my Uncle passed away last spring, my mother was devastated. He lived several states away and due to the cost of the flight, she would be unable to attend the funeral. The minute my husband found this out, he immediately booked a ticket for her. No one even hinted at the idea, but that's just the kind of guy he is.

I don't know, I'm going to have to really chew on this. There's so much to think about!

Oh, and whoever it was who cautioned not to breathe a word of it to the children unless all permission was given and everything was 100% set in stone, absolutely no worries at all!! Boy would that be a recipe for disaster!

 

[PolyndianPrincessJes]

I'm a commercial for staying on-site, but your vacation home sounds like a pretty good compromise. DW really is a special place, and if she was sad to miss her girls at an ice show, well...

I also would really think about doing the first trip alone. We're very well-traveled, as well (both domestically and abroad), but WDW is just such an awesome place that it really can't be compared to any other trip we've taken (or will take, I imagine). Apples and Mickey Bars...seriously.

Good luck, and no matter what you choose, there will be a wealth of tips and info here in the DIS.

 

[branv]

Well I can definitely say I wish I had a sister like you. Heck, I wish I had an aunt like you! They are lucky to have both you and your special husband in their lives. Best of luck to you, whatever you decide.

 

[cheshireqt]

Wow, what a generous offer. Your DH sounds like a wonderful guy to offer to be outnumbered by the ladies at a ratio of 5 to 1 on vacation! Have you thought about you and DH staying by yourselves for a couple of days at a deluxe resort, perhaps Animal Kingdom Lodge or Beach Club (whatever strikes your fancy) and then have your sister and girls join you at the off-site condo? Perhaps 4 days and then 5 days? This way you properly lure DH into Disney's charm and you are prepared to be hostess, tour-guide and fun-facilitator when the gals all get there. Maybe offer to DH, if he wants to stay on with the ladies, some golf time or a Petty driving experience at the Race Track..something just for him on one of the days? After all with your sis he will now be outnumbered 6 to 1
Would love to hear what you decide. It is great that you are really thinking this through!

 

[Vacation Lover]

I think you're on the right track with the vacation home. We just returned from a stay at Windsor Hills with our 3 kids, my MIL and her friend and it was wonderful. You could rent a car with the money you save, and it's very easy to get around if you have a GPS.

Here's how I would present it to your sister: make it about YOU--not that you're doing her a favor, but that you're doing this because it would be fun for you. "DH and I were talking about our Disney trip and we think it would be so much more fun to do Disney with children. We were thinking...what if we rented a vacation home so the girls could come too? We'll spring for the kids tickets and if you and your DH want to join us, there's plenty of room for all of us!"

Have a great time!

 

[roscoepc1]

What a generous thing to do! I would talk privately with your sister and make sure she is on board with your idea of taking the kids. If she agrees then I would privately talk to the girls and explain your plan to them.

I would suggest that you ask the girls to help raise some extra money so that they can surprise their mom with the trip too. They are old enough to do odd jobs around the neighborhood and do some baby sitting to raise some money. It will make them feel a part of it all and make them appreciate what they are being giving. If mom gets suspicious of the extra good behavior and hard work of the girls, tell her that you suggested that they earn some spending money for the trip.

Enjoy the planning and have a blast on the trip!

I think this (the surprising the mom with HER ticket) is a PHENOMENAL idea!

I would ask. You know your sister- in your heart, you know how to approach her! But I do think (and as I said, LOVE the above idea) you should find some way to include your sister. (I wouldn't give a flip about what your bil thinks, it isn't about him! He knows he's being a butt, otherwise they wouldn't be having issues!)

You're going to need two rooms anyways, with 6, so one more person won't add all that much $$ in the long run. And I'm saying that as someone on a tight budget! AND we did find our 7 yr old got a bit weepy by the end of the week, and that was WITH her mommy there (me, lol)...she was so tired, and overwhelmed from all the fun, she needed me.

I think you're an awesome person!

 

[cocodog]

I think it's a great idea!! Every child needs a childless aunt (and uncle) to spoil them. What a great guy your husband must be for suggesting it. Try to be prepared for a wide variety of responses from your sister.

 

[squirrel]

I have taken my niece on my last three Disney trips.

The first trip was to Disneyland for 4 nights when she was 3.5 yrs.

The second and third trips were to WDW for 14 nights each. She loved having all the attention. She is trying to figure out a way her little sister can't come this year.

This year it is her little sister's turn and she will be almost 4.5 yrs. She is excited, but she is quite different than her older sister. I think she will miss her mom more.