Suggestions for 2 families traveling together...

[polyfan]

We always go to WDW just the 4 of us- myself, dh, and two sons 4 & 7. this year a friend and her dh, and two sons, 3 and 6 are going also. they have never been before, she says they will do whatever we do. Anybody have any experience traveling with another family or suggestions?

 

[thetraveler]

would be to make certain that you do spend some time apart during your trip. No matter how close your two families are, there's nothing like some alone time with just you and yours. Have fun

 

[goofy4tink]

I would second that advice! We traveled with another family on our last visit. I was sure that when we got off the plane at home,we would never speak to each other again. They asked me to do the planning, which I was happy to do. Checked everything with them, gave them a copy of what we were doing, and when we were doing it. Told them nothing was etched in stone. The other dh was never happy. We started splitting up after only 3 days. We would do a couple of hours in a park together, then go our seperate ways for the rest of the day. Sometimes ate dinner together. We found that to work out quite well. I would suggest that you plan on 'just family' time every day, for at least a little while. It will make a huge difference. Oh, we are still good friends but we won't travel together anymore!!

 

[polyfan]

goofy4tink- wow, that sounds like my situation so far- I have done all the planning,made all the PS for dinner, I sent them a copy of my plans for each day as in what park each day and where we were eating for the PS (which they told me to make for all of us)- I told them to let me know if there was something they didn't like or thought they would rather do, but they said no, it looked great. I just have this feeling that is not going to be great once they get there. I just have a hard time changing my way of doing things when we have been doing it every year for 8 years.

 

[CamColt]

Great thread!!! This will help us out too. We have 2 DSs 3 & 6 and are going along with our neighbors with 2 DSs 4 & 6. Im the disneyholic and the others havent been in 17 years, so Im in charge. Im a bit nervous that they will hate it and it will cause problems, but I have already repeatedly told them, they dont have to do everything we do...but they want to, because they dont have a clue.

 

[polyfan]

Camcolt- sounds just like us- I am afraid I will be the one not having a good time because I'll be too busy trying to keep everyone else happy and worrying that they don't like what I want to do. I wish I had not gotten myself in this situation. We go July1st. I am very set in my ways and we have learned what works for our family, but for someone elses, I don't know.

 

[BevS97]

I would not plan on being together with the other family 24/7 - that sounds like a recipe for disaster. Maybe you could schedule some apart time into that plan?

at the very least, if you get to a park and one family says 'we need the bathroom' feel comfortable saying, "ok we are going to ride Dumbo and we'll catch up with you later" rather than dragging your whole family over to the bathroom and waiting for them - too many people and you can spend your whole time waiting for other people rather than actually doing things.

Bev

 

[clutter]

Just pray that the kids make it all work out. If they are the "follow along but don't express an opinion" type of people, you will drive yourself nuts worrying if they are having a good time. Hopefully they'll perk up while there, lol.

The older boys may hit it off (are they already friends?), maybe you can trade them off on either set of parents and let the littler ones have some good parenting time. If the kids don't get along, you're in deep kimshee. Prepare a second plan, one for them, one for you, where you all end up meeting up for certain meals and events together, but are off on your own for other times.

 

[disneygeek]

Last year we went to WDW with a family that we always go with. There were 9 adults and 2 kids under two. We rented a house from www.gemstonehomes.com. It was awesome and inexpensive. 100/pr adult for 5 nights. Everyone had there own bedroom. We shared the family room/kitchen area of course. We ate at the house 2 meals a day. And rested there. We would swim in the pool every day. We rented 2 minivans so that we could split up if necessary. Some would come and nap and relax will others were more commando type tourists.

i know that this isn't the best for everyone but we were extremely satisfied.

 

[MinnieGi]

We have travelled with another family too and it went so well they are joining us on our February trip next year!!

I was the "planner" for our first trip and have already been asked to do that again - so I guess they liked everything!! I did not schedule everyday out, but did plan several special meals together throughout our week. Now these are good friends of ours and we did spend a good deal of the time together touring the parks, swimming, and eating together. But we were also comfortable enough to say, "We're going to chill out this afternoon in our room and by the pool." And another morning we decided to sleep in and they decided to go to MK early and we met up later. We also arranged an afternoon for the guys to golf and another for the girls to shop. So it worked out great. It was also great for "adult" rides. Since at the time we each only had one child and both were toddlers we'd pair up the kids and two adults and the other two went on an "adult" ride and then we switched. We really liked that - usually DH and I do the child swap and ride alone - I think its more fun to ride with someone!!

We're all looking forward to another trip together!!!
Have fun!!!

 

[goofy4tink]

I think my basic problem was that as the planner for the trip, I was constantly worried that the other family wasn't having a good time. I love planning and the other mom doesn't, so it seemed like a great idea to me. If we ever do it again, I'll plan more alone time. Then again...my dh, who seemed like a saint next to the other dh, told me on our last night (as we sat on the curb waiting for Spectro to start) that he wanted to do WDW again but just the three of us, no one else!! So, I guess it did work out in the end!!!

 

[dsnycrzy]

Love they ideas, I was thinking about this same situation. I have one problem though, I paid for everything, so how would I split up? I doubt we would anyway just because the kids would want to do all the rides together. It will be me, DD10, DS7, DD1, DD's friend 9, My sister her kids DS12,DD9, DS8, DD1 1/2, my other sister and her god son whose 2. I don't like giving out money for 2 reasons, 1. I have to take care of 12 people and I do better budgeting then them and 2. if I do give them money I always feel like it's not enough and I'm being cheap. That's 2 1/2 families 1 pocket. Any suggestions?

 

[djm99]

I have planned several trips with other families. In Feb 2002 myself along with 2 families went to LA (we did Disney and Universal) I was the planner and we pretty much had a ball. Although one of the familes were not "thrilled" with Universal Studios (which i loved) they didn't blame it on me. They wanted the experience of just going. In July 2002 I planned a Disneyworld Vacation (That was when airlines tickets were supercheap) now this family didn't want to do a lot of stuff my husband and I wanted to do. They wanted to go to the Clearwater Beach (about a hour away from Orlando) and with us both only having one child they took our daughter with them and dropped us off at Island of Adventure and- boy, my husband and I haven't had that much fun sense high school. This year were going back to disney taking 3 families with us - (2 went with us to LA last year) and although i'm sure we will not to do everything together, we have met and agreed on at least doing 2 days at disney.

I think that's the key sitting down with EVERYONE (including husbands) and figuring out what everyone wants to do and whatever else they can do own their own. Oh yeah if at all possible take more than one car.

 

[LIFERBABE]

We returned 2 weeks ago from our group trip to WDW. There was a total of of 28 of us and we stayed in 2 vacation homes.

I planned everything! Having travelled with our "miserable" cousin and her family last year I made several changes to our trip this year. I was very leary but everyone was so excited to go that I decided to give it a go again.

We did have meetings and phone conferences. I bought planners for each family ($1.00 store) and at the meetings I gave out PS numbers for the breakfast and the other activities.
THere were some that wanted to do Disney and those that wanted to do US. They had never been and had no clue ( many were not interested in planning their own vacation either which to me is 75% of the fun)

For together activities, I booked Chef Mickey's for 28 one morning and our house did Beaches n Cream the first night as the others hadnt arrived.

Other than that, as soon as we arrived at the parks, we split up. Some mornings we left early and left them a quick note as to our agenda. We kept in touch by cell and never waited to proceed with the days activities. I advised everyone to drive their own family vehicle and even though the kids were getting along great, the kids were to ride with their parents. You need to be free to make split decisions without affecting the group, this is what vacation is FREEDOM!

Do not tie yourself to another family (I love my friends dearly) and set a time limit of how long you will wait for each other. i.e. 5 minutes and then move on and we'll see you back at the house.

At first they thought I was being mean, but it worked out perfect and everyone remarked on how much fun they had and we are all still best friends.

We spent alot of time together at the house with the kids swimming and the men went out one night to celebrate a birthday and the ladies ate chocolate dipped strawberries and sipped wine in the hot tub while the kids slept.

It was the best trip ever and everyone wants to go back next year. That is a true testament as I vowed never to invite our miserable cousin again (who did not go this year) and almost swore off group trips.

You can still have a "family" vacation on a group trip. Make some PS's for you and some for the other family and let them decide if they want to do them or not. Don't schedule them for the same time.

Sometimes the DH's can be a problem as your husband is used to your planning and touring style and the other DH is not. It's one thing to follow along with his wife but anyone else they may feel the need to assert himself over his families decisions. This usually comes after they have let you plan everything which is irritating to say the least. Even though you planned everything, leave it up to them as to what they do and they will find their groove.

 

[motaei]

I too am going with another family & I have been designated the planner (my first time to WDW). I've done this before on other trips with the same family, but I have never been anywhere that required reservations & stuff. I have always just made a ton a research & followed a general idea. I like the idea to make the PS & then do them or not. I was worried about - "what if they don't want to do that park that day?" But I guess if we never make it to the PS, it won't kill anybody. Sometimes I get a bit tense. I want to make sure everybody has a good time, but over the years, I have learned to relax a bit. Years ago, when I took them to DL, DH told me the the other DW mentioned I was a bit uptight about getting all the rides in & stuff - which miffed me off at the time - so I've tried to learn to be a bit more "Hakuna Matata" in style. My big worry is that the other DW if wigging out that we are spending so much time there - 6 days. I somehow have to explain to her that WDW is very different than DL (which we did in a weekend) or DLP (which they did on there own in the rainy winter). I just pray the weather is good for us, so if any of us wants to just kick back at the resort (CSR) we can. I want to make plans, but leave enough wiggle room to be able to throw them out the window if I have to. It's just the Cirque tickets that will have to be etched in stone since they are pre-paid. But I have to admit, I still worry if I'm making all the right decisions because I feel I have to make everyone happy. Let's chant together "Hakuna Matata".

Also, we have definatley learned to have time apart. It makes for a much better time when we're not with each other 24/7. So if things are getting a little tense, nicely suggest just that. I'm the shopper in the group, so sometimes I will go off all by myself which is a real treat after stressing over all the planning.

 

[NotUrsula]

"I have one problem though, I paid for everything, so how would I split up?"

I'm not sure what you mean by this. Surely you are not holding the incidental spending money for each individual? I don't think that's a great idea when more than one nuclear family is concerned, bound to cause resentment all over the place. If you absolutely had to do that and were staying onsite, you could put pre-set spending limits on the room cards, I suppose. Park passes are best purchased in advance; they are less expensive that way, anyway. If you are buying them, buy them as a gift, photocopy the backs, and just pass them out once, preferably before you get there. If they lose them, you can refer to your receipts for replacements, but I'd read the riot act about losing them.

Normally, in a multiple-family situation, incidentals, including meals, are on a cash basis within each nuclear family, unless one family is hosting a particular meal, in which case it is their treat. One family might make the room reservations and put down the initial deposits, but then collect all of the lodging money for the trip before departing. NEVER let a trip begin on the theory that a travelling companion will pay you back later; that is a recipe for disaster--either it is a gift, or it isn't, but don't be anyone else's creditor. If the purchase you are making is going to be non-refundable, such as air tickets, don't do it unless a paying member of the other family is actually present at the time you make the purchase, cc in hand.

 

[CamColt]

Polyfan, check your pms when you get a chance.

 

[polyfan]

camcolt-just checked them Thanks

 

[beattyfamily]

I'm so enjoying this thread and seeing my scenario and me in many of the replies!!!

This year, our first stay 'home' at the Boardwalk, we invited my BIL and his family so we'll have a 2 bedroom with a kitchen.

I'm a bit nervous as this is a big vacation and lots of money and I'm just afraid of how it will turn out. I'm not very close with them either. This will be our 5th visit while it will be their first. I'm kind of excited showing them everything but nervous too.

Then when our best friends found out, they wanted to come next year so we've already started planning that trip with our friends and their 3 young children...we have 2 DD's 3 1/2 and 7. I sure hope we can remain friends after that trip!

Of course, I'm doing all the planning and I'm very organized and I am also a worry wart and I'll be worrying all week hoping everyone's having a good time...

Wish me luck!

 

[john1012]

It is great to have family and friends along. Over the past few years I have planned a few such adventures. Although I have a tendency to overplan( I've got spreadsheets, planners, etc.) I do allow a lot of free time. For the most part I would pick a restaraunt or event each night for the group and make all the reservations. unless the event was prepaid I would tell people to cancel thier PS if they weren't going to make it. I would have an agenda for my own family and would leave it up to everyone else if they would like to join in, no pressure and no disappointments. A lot of things change when you are with a group, especially with kids. Some people are early risers and others are nightowls. Small kids sometimes mean frequent trips back to the room or downtime at the resort.