It's going to sound soooo stupid, but it matters a lot to me.
On tuesday night I told him a lot of things that I don't normally tell people. I mean my small niche of people know my secrets, but he's not in my small niche. I also told him some things I HAVEN'T told people in my small niche. He basically tested the waters to see how much he means to me by asking me that question about "I'd never f you over, so am I gonna die soon?", so he KNOWS he means a lot to me.
He just never wants to see me anywhere other than work it seems. I mean, we've made plans before and he's broken them, twice. I invited him to see a movie with a friend and I, and he just didn't respond to the text. It just makes me feel like I'm just some sort of entertainment at work for him. Then, of course, the only person I talk to says that he probably just doesn't want to be friends outside of work. I dunno, I just don't understand him. He wants to know everything about my life, but he basically doesn't want to be my friend, he wants me to entertain him with stories of my life. He's told me more than once that I'm the most fascinating person he's ever met, and that I have the most interesting stories. I mean, I always felt that I was going in a good direction with it, but now I just feel like a book reader in a kindergarden class of 1.
I'm probably overreacting, and he probably never got the text, but it still just hurts being ignored right after I trusted him with a lot of stuff.
