Starting to freak about the holidays

[jedi_librarian]

Ok, I think it just hit me about 5 minutes ago that the holidays are coming! This week is Thanksgiving, we just came back from Disneyland a little over a week ago, and next week we're leaving to Puerto Rico for 10 days for a family wedding. Meanwhile, I still gotta get the house ready for Turkey day, we're celebrating my Mother and MIL's birthdays on T-day so I gotta get cakes and presents, I have to plan my Black Friday shopping, I have to gather gifts for family in PR, including homemade calendars I decided to make everyone at the last minute

What drives me nuts is that I get no sympathy from DH. He thinks I do it to myself and gets annoyed when I start to freak (like right now). He seriously thinks I'm the only person in the world to stress out about stuff like this! He dreads Thanksgiving morning because of how "freaked" I get. He just hides from me and watches TV or surfs on the Internet

EEEEEKKKK!! Just wanted to vent. I'm not looking for sympathy


By the way, if anyone is feeling this way, I highly recommend the book, "God Rest ye Grumpy Scroogeymen" by Laura Walker. It's a riot!

 

[golfgal]

Why do you freak out? I guess I don't understand. I would have to side with your DH. So you are making a meal, do what you can the day before and if it isn't perfect, oh well. Skip the calendars and give them as Valentines presents or something. Order the cake from a bakery, that will take about 2 minutes on the phone. Get gift cards for the mom's or gift certificates someplace (massages maybe). I had 30 people at our house for Christmas last year. It isn't that big of a deal unless you make it that way.

 

[Disney Doll]

In the year 2001, both my in-laws died. My DFIL died in March. My DMIL became ill shortly after he died and died in December. So, we spent basically that whole year caring for sick people.

DMIL died December 9th. Normally by December 9th, my holiday planning, shopping, doing is in full swing. Of course, that year, I was spending a large amount of time at my DMIL's home, because we were caring for her in her home. We had a schedule, there were 5 primary caregivers with a couple of "back-ups". Can't go to the mall when you have a sick MIL who can't be left alone. Can't decorate your house when you're not at it because you are at DMIL's. Can't attend the holiday parties. Can't do a quaint little "tree shopping" event, because you only have an hour to get the tree before you have to be back at DMIL's to care for her. Could bake cookies at DMIL's. Could do holiday cards at DMIL's. Could wrap what presents I was able to buy at DMIL's.

And Christmas came anyway. And it was fine. And we lived through it. And, quite frankly, that year I learned more about the meaning of Christmas than any shopping, tree trimming, or partying ever could have taught me. In many ways, it changed my life.

Christmas always comes. Do the things that are important. Let the other stuff go.

 

[Crankyshank]

Honestly? As someone who dreads the holidays because her Mother is such a stress case that it just sucks the fun and meaning right out of it, i think you need to step back and evaluate why you're letting it get to you. Golfgal has some great advice. Even just small things like cook the veggies and dessert the night before.

I know all about the pressure to get everything just right and to make the holidays magical, but when you're rush rush rush to do all of this stuff and everything has to be done you're missing the point of the holiday season. If your family is avoiding you because of freaking out, then that kind of defeats the purpose don't you think?