Spin off....head table at wedding

[LBIJim]

I've never been to a wedding reception with a sweetheart table. Mostly head tables, or in some smaller venues, the bridal party sat at a standard round or long table in the middle of the surrounding tables.

Jim

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

Spinoff from another thread that mentioned having a head table at a wedding.

Are head tables common? I haven't seen a head table at a wedding since the 80s. These days it's a sweetheart table for the bride and groom, and the bridal party sits with their spouses, family, etc.

Just curious if it's a regional thing (I'm in NJ), or is that head tables are making a comeback?

I'm past the age of being a bridesmaid, so I don't have to worry about it! Just curious what states people live in that do head tables, and if they ever do sweetheart tables in those regions?

I hate head tables - did not have one 18 years ago at my wedding. Everyone of my attendants was from out of town and they were bringing spouses or dates who had never met anyone else present. So unfair to make them sit with strangers.

I love that people have moved beyond the head table - it really serves no purpose!

 

[cabanafrau]

Completely unfamiliar with the tradition of a sweetheart table. I've only been to two weddings that didn't have a head table, one was a very informal beach wedding and the other was my own, which was small enough where everyone in attendance was seated at the single table in the private venue. Had no interest in the whole wedding fiesta, still not my thing.

 

[YoYoAurora]

I live in the south. The majority of the weddings I help plan have a sweetheart table with the wedding party seated nearby with their family/significant other. I have a couple of brides who are insisting on having the head table.

One bride changed her mind from a head table to a sweetheart table after being a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding. She said that having to sit at the head table without her fiance was lonely.

 

[Disney Doll]

5 weddings in the last year and I've seen mostly head tables. I think there was 1 sweetheart table.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

My best friend's wedding 2 years ago had a head table on a stage.... which I promptly knocked over later in the evening

She was 26ish so I imagine it's still pretty common if new/young brides are still doing it.

You got startled and kicked it, didnt you?

 

[Gumbo4x4]

Most of the restaurant showers here are in separate rooms at the restaurants - mostly Italian, since 9 out of 10 restaurants here are Italian!

Is there a meal, or do they just use the space? As a guy, I don't attend showers (I probably just started another spinoff LOL), but DW says its usually just cake and punch and maybe some other finger foods.

 

[Bonnie40]

Our daughter is getting married this July, and she's not having a head table or a sweetheart table. They will be a the start of a very long table down the middle with their wedding party sitting with their partners rather than just the bridal party. Family next, etc. Nothing worse than having spouses/partners sitting with people they don't even know. Realizing that this wedding is breaking all the traditional rules - it's certainly going to shake things up with the older guests!

 

[Pixiedustaway]

Long island and I haven't been to. Wedding with a head table. Only one where they has one was in PA. But the family was originally from LI.

 

[mjkacmom]

Is there a meal, or do they just use the space? As a guy, I don't attend showers (I probably just started another spinoff LOL), but DW says its usually just cake and punch and maybe some other finger foods.

Oh, not here - full sit-down meal, most likely with wine. There really aren't any occassions here that wouldn't call for a full meal, regardless of the time of day.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

Oh, not here - full sit-down meal, most likely with wine. There really aren't any occassions here that wouldn't call for a full meal, regardless of the time of day.

I like it

 

[DisneyJamieCA]

I got married 15 years ago, so things may have changed, but we had a head table with our bridal party. They only sat there for toasts/dinner and then they went where they wanted or spouses came up the table. Didn't really matter to me. That said, in the case that somebody had a date, their date was sat a table with people they already knew.

It's been a long time since we've been to a wedding, but all the ones we went to had a head table.

 

[Handbag Lady]

We have head tables and larger sweetheart tables where the bride and groom sit with only their MOH and Best Man. Everyone else in the bridal party sits with their guests.


But MOST of the time, there is a head table.

 

[deedeetoo]

I've never heard of a sweetheart table. I've only seen head tables, but it has been a couple years since I've been to a wedding.

 

[Dizneefamily+4]

Every wedding we've every been to had a head table. We were married in 1997 and had a head table as well. It's the norm in these parts (Northeast Wisconsin as well as the weddings I've attended where I grew up in the north east suburbs of Chicago.)

 

[mtemm]

I started hearing about sweetheart tables when dh and I were married in '97. I remember thinking about it, but ended up going with a head table. I've been to many weddings since then with sweetheart tables and honestly if we were to do it again I would go with one. we barely sat anyway, were too busy making the rounds, and it would have been nice for our bridal party to sit with their spouses/boyfriend/girlfriends.

 

[aprilgail2]

I find it interesting too! For instance, in my family we always host baby and bridal showers at home. I always thought that was the norm until I got to the age where my friends were getting married and all of the showers were a Italian restaurants. My husband family does the Italian restaurant thing too, yum!

I think I went to one shower back in the 80's that was in a home- they are usually always out someplace!

Is there a meal, or do they just use the space? As a guy, I don't attend showers (I probably just started another spinoff LOL), but DW says its usually just cake and punch and maybe some other finger foods.

Always a full meal served! Usually drinks too. If it is not a full served sit down meal its at least a full buffet. Never just cake and punch/finger food!

As far as wedding I went to one that had a sweetheart table, the rest was head table for whole bridal party. And they always dance the first dance with who they are paired up with. Each pair is announced by the DJ and come out dancing!

 

[WorldWacky]

Any wedding I was at always had a head table. I live in Western PA. Some of our interesting traditions are The Cookie Table and the Shot Dance. Your wedding is judged by your cookie table. Different family members and friends supply cookies for this table and it is usually an elaborate spread. Many people will bring a ziplock bag to fill up. The Shot dance requires you to pay a dollar or other amount and then you drink a shot of booze and dance with the Bride or Groom. I thought these happened at every wedding until I went to some in other states

Ah yes, The Cookie Table. I'm from Pittsburgh, DH from Long Island. His family was so confused when I mentioned the cookie table. Having only been to weddings at home, didn't realize it wasn't the norm in other states. I've never seen the shot dance though at any of the weddings that I've been to at home. I wonder if that's more common for particular nationalities. I think my cousin who married into a Greek family had a "Money Dance." Same concept I guess. We had a head table 13 years ago. Here on LI, I've only been to weddings with Sweetheart tables.

 

[DeaverTex]

I've been to 8 (9?) weddings in the past 63 years (How do you guys go to so many? ) and have never seen a head table at any of them. This thread is also the first time I'd ever heard of a sweetheart table, but the concept has some appeal. I've never heard of a cookie table either, but I like the idea a lot! And the shot table wouldn't fly at any reception I've ever seen, due to the venue being part of the church where the wedding took place.

Showers around here, at least the ones I've known about, have always been in somebody's home. Then again, none of our friends has any money, which may explain things.

 

[NEDisneyFans]

We had a sweetheart table when we were married in 2006, in MA. My SILs both had sweetheart tables when they were married in 2011 (CO) and 2012 (MA). My niece had a headtable at hers in 2008 (CA). I think it just depends on what the bride/couple want to do or what options she/they are familiar with.