So tell me...

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I'm probably one of the minority; I don't think there should be a seperate school. I know bullying can suck (I'll be honest, I used to pick on some kids - but not about disabilities, sexuality, gender, etc, more materialistic, which I know is not much better), but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger and I am firm believer of that.

People need to be responsible for their own actions, and if people think high school is ever rough, real life outside those school doors is a lot worst. Protecting kids from the "pain" is only going to make them less able to accept it later in life.

I Googled it - the school closed in 2003.
The thing that scares me is that the bullies easily COULD kill someone. Our public schools are full of thugs.
I disagree that real life is harder than high school. For me, high school was a major hurdle that had to be cleared in order to gain access to the rest of my life. Since I made it out of high school things have been pretty decent, and I have been out of high school for 20 years.

 

[jlewisinsyr]

The thing that scares me is that the bullies easily COULD kill someone. Our public schools are full of thugs.

And in the 50s - 60's it was the greasers beating up on kids. Rarely do you hear of a bully killing someone, usually its a kid that goes postal, killing the bully.

I disagree that real life is harder than high school. For me, high school was a major hurdle that had to be cleared in order to gain access to the rest of my life. Since I made it out of high school things have been pretty decent, and I have been out of high school for 20 years.

Maybe I should have said it a little different. People can be cruel in high school, no doubt, but it is often filtered. In the real world, there are no filters.

 

[DVC~OKW~96]

I have to continue to disagree, 'cuse.

HS was the single most horrible experience of my life. In the real world people still hate me simply for what I am, but I don't have to listen to them say it every day. I can also choose to remove myself from them. I couldn't do that in HS.

I'm not sure how I feel about segregated HS, but right now I'd have to say that giving teens a place to learn and come to self awareness about their being gay is more of a good thing. They'd have the opportunity to grow strong, learn self respect and be educated.

Protection to grow strong can't be all bad.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I think we all have more choices in the real world. If you encounter workplace harassment then you have legal recourse. You also have a choice of what company to work for. DH works for a company with (I believe) a 100% rating from HRC. You can move to a geographic region that is more progressive and welcoming. As adults we just have much more control than when we were in high school.

It is true that bullying typically doesn't directly result in death. On the other hand, we all know that suicide rates among gay teens are astronomical. I bet bullying plays a part in some of those.

I was bullied in high school for no particular reason. I probably would have hated it even without the bullying.

 

[DVC~OKW~96]

Homosexual teens are have the second highest risk of committing suicide. Primary risk goes to white males over 80.

Bullying may not typically result in death, but it does cause emotional harm and scarring; often for life.

 

[Kevin&Randall]

You went to school in Boulder? A lot of my friends were there for school in those years. I wonder if we know anyone in common.

I saw you said Southern Colorado -- you talking Alamosa, Durango, Gunnison or even smaller? My Uncle had a ranch in Buena Vista - I loved it there.

Growing up in Greeley was interesting. Going back even more so. I was tortured in 6th and 7th grade for being "different." I never fit in. I was so happy to get to college.

I met some great friends in college and we still keep in touch. Besides my family, I keep track of two other people from my "hometown." Otherwise, I really have nothing in common there anymore.

Randall


ohhhhh... top!

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I want to thank all of you again for sharing your experiences!

To those who were bullied and/or did not have supportive families, I am so sorry. I am glad you made it through those times and that you are here today to talk about it.

Anyone who has just been following along up to this point, feel free to contribute!

 

[air]

I always knew that I was different ever since I was little. I came out to my friends when I was 15 and a few months later I came out to my family. My family is very supportive and don't really think anything of it. My sister was the first family member I told, she cried. She didn't cry because she was sad but she cried because she felt so bad that I felt that I had to hide it for so long. Then I told my mom that same day and she gave me a hug and asked what I wanted for dinner, haha.

 

[jlewisinsyr]

There was one person I came out to in kind of, well and odd way.

My uncle owns his own business and his daughter (my cousin who I was very close with) was helping him set-up his fax machine. So I was at my house and we were faxing each other back and forth until she had all the settings right (this was in the early 90's boys and girls, when modems were rated at speeds of 2,400 bps (that's bits not bytes)).

This was before I really came out to a lot of people. So I faxed her a note and said, let me know if your dad is still around. She faxed back and said he had gone to bed. So I faxed her this note that said something along the lines of I don't want you to fax me back, I want you to think about this for a three or four days. I'm gay.

Two days later, I started getting worried that she was mad or something, so I called her. I asked her if she was mad at me and if it was because I told her I was gay. She said no, not at all, and she hadn't called me because I told her to wait three of four days and it was only the second day later.

I felt like a complete idiot.

 

[rpmdfw]

I saw you said Southern Colorado -- you talking Alamosa, Durango, Gunnison or even smaller? My Uncle had a ranch in Buena Vista - I loved it there.

Growing up in Greeley was interesting. Going back even more so. I was tortured in 6th and 7th grade for being "different." I never fit in. I was so happy to get to college.

I met some great friends in college and we still keep in touch. Besides my family, I keep track of two other people from my "hometown." Otherwise, I really have nothing in common there anymore.

Randall

I grew up in Trinidad, Colorado. I'd say it's the smallest place in the world (no MacDonalds until I was a Senior in High School), but my grandparents lived in Aguilar, Colorado which was by far smaller (only two paved roads in the entire town).

My brother has been in the Durango area for over 10 years, and I've got family and friends in Pueblo, Denver, and outside of Alamosa.

I've got one very good friend left in Boulder. She runs a "family services" agency that contracts with the state.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I always knew that I was different ever since I was little. I came out to my friends when I was 15 and a few months later I came out to my family. My family is very supportive and don't really think anything of it. My sister was the first family member I told, she cried. She didn't cry because she was sad but she cried because she felt so bad that I felt that I had to hide it for so long. Then I told my mom that same day and she gave me a hug and asked what I wanted for dinner, haha.

Thanks for your reply!

There was one person I came out to in kind of, well and odd way.

My uncle owns his own business and his daughter (my cousin who I was very close with) was helping him set-up his fax machine. So I was at my house and we were faxing each other back and forth until she had all the settings right (this was in the early 90's boys and girls, when modems were rated at speeds of 2,400 bps (that's bits not bytes)).

This was before I really came out to a lot of people. So I faxed her a note and said, let me know if your dad is still around. She faxed back and said he had gone to bed. So I faxed her this note that said something along the lines of I don't want you to fax me back, I want you to think about this for a three or four days. I'm gay.

Two days later, I started getting worried that she was mad or something, so I called her. I asked her if she was mad at me and if it was because I told her I was gay. She said no, not at all, and she hadn't called me because I told her to wait three of four days and it was only the second day later.

I felt like a complete idiot.

That's a cute story! I am glad your cousin was cool with your faxed announcement!

 

[hematite153]

Well, when I was 15 I was sure I was a lesbian. Then, at 16 I fell in love with a boy and got really confused. That confusion got stronger as the relationship lasted and my GLBT friends kept telling me that I was straight. At 26 I came out to my family as gay--I'm reasonably sure they mostly think of me as a lesbian because I've never invested the time to explain in greater detail. I moved in with my DW when I was 28 and got married when I was 29 and now most of the world thinks I'm a lesbian. But, I'm not, I'm bi. There really don't seem to be any good examples for being bi, so many people tell you it's not real and think you're just easing into coming out. I think I really figured this out when I was 26...I really do get attracted to both men and women and I don't have to deny either of those.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

hematite153 - Obviously your feelings are 100% valid. I don't see how anyone can argue with you over it. I guess maybe human nature is to want to categorize everyone into columns and never admit that there can be crossover. I am glad you are in a loving relationship!

I have learned a lot from this thread! I am glad I started it!