Slightly Freaking

[mickeysaver]

When my honey and I went to WDW last year, we made arrangements to meet up one night at DTD with her 3 best friends and one of her sisters. This would not have been so bad, except, it turned into a large group of people and most of them made me feel really uncomfortable and left out. My honey even admitted that the night turned into a disaster. But, in return, she said, "Never again."

Well, during the same trip, the last day was to be family day at MK with her family. We had to compromise our plans just to make her family happy. It was more of an intrusion on our vacation than we ever imagined that it would be. Let's just say that again, I felt like the red headed step child.

Ok, that having been said, we agreed that this WDW vacation would be ours alone. We would invite no one to join us. We wouldn't have to work around anyone else, it would be just us unless her family chose to follow OUR schedule and join us. We wouldn't deviate from what I have worked really hard to plan out.

Now, her Mom is wanting to join us on our Epcot day. This wouldn't be so bad, except I want to see Epcot on my own terms and I know if she is along, that just won't happen. My mother outlaw has limited energy and walking capacity due to multiple health problems. She certainly won't want to ride TT or M:S. I want to ride them. She won't want to stay all day and the plans call for us to stay all day, see all the Santas and Storytellers. Our plans also call for Candlelight Processional and seeing Illuminations! after/during dinner at Rose & Crown. This will all be trashed if she joins us. I don't want to have to change anything else about our plans. I have worked and reworked the itinerary to the point where it all makes sense for touring with just me and my honey.

I am not a total ogre. I have plans to surprise my mother outlaw by driving her from her home in rural FL to Orlando just to do the Afternoon Tea at the Grand Floridian the day before we were to actually arrive at WDW. Her Mom loves the whole British Tea thing. I thought it might be a nice way to spend the afternoon. I think we might even ask the my honey's sisters to join us too. But, that is still up in the air.

I am not overly tight with my honey's Mom. She has ticked me off on several occasions. It's always stressful for me to be around her, but I am trying. But, I just can't stand the thought of her screwing up my plans at WDW on this trip. It's so bad, that I am starting to dread the trip. My honey is totally her Mother's little girl. I am freaking out! Mickey

 

[reddixie]

Ok this might be a solution. At tea while she is in a good mood ask her to join ya'll at Epcot at dinner time at the Rose and Crown. Tell her dinner is your treat and then you'll be staying for Candlelight Processional and Illumanations. Explain that this will limit her walking and still allow her to do all the cool Christmas things with ya'll. Maybe that will work.

 

[Princess_Aurora]

Will she be able to herself there and back? If so and if she's determined to intrude on your special vacation then why not just spend a little bit of the day with her and then send her on her way.

However, I would say that the best way to deal with this would be just to tell her, or have your honey tell her, that this trip is strictly for the two of you and you have special plans that don't involve anyone else...maybe next trip she can come along but this trip is just for the two of you. Hopefully she'll understand that.

 

[mickeysaver]

In order for her mother to join us, most likely we will be paying for her admission. We would have to arrange to be up early enough to go rent her an ECV and that means that I get to get up early after staying up late at MVMCP and run to Epcot and then wait for my honey and my mother outlaw to catch up to me. We would also be "stuck" with her all day, or at least until she wanted to leave. When it comes time for her to leave, she will most likely want us to go with her and we will be forced to eat at some place like Shoneys offsite.

I hate this! I just want to be free of the things that mess with my life in the real world when I am at WDW.

Having to deal with family issues screws around with my badness level and causes bad pixie dust karma. lol Mickey

 

[browneyes]

This is why I wait until the last minute to tell my SO's family where I'll be at, just in case they decide to tag along. We went on a weekend trip this past weekend and my DD told one of my SO's SIL's where we were going. She decided we were on a family trip, so they came along too. Normally the SIL gets on my nerves (she yells at her dh and her kids about how stupid they are ), but fortunately, she was in a good mood this weekend.

Maybe your honey's mom will change her mind. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

 

[Jillpie]

Good luck with this one. It sounds like maybe it would have been a better idea if nobody even mentioned you guys going to DW this time and just have gone alone. Maybe next time? Good luck!

 

[mickeysaver]

Thanks folks. This turned into a major deal last night. I ended up becoming extremely upset last night. Part of it was just being overly tired and the other part was just extreme frustration.

My honey's mom just sort of invited herself. The way we were originally planning to do this trip was just to tell her family that we were coming down for a short visit with them only, but then we ended up deciding to ask her sister to watch our Chihuahuas for us while we were at WDW, so that went out the window. My honey refuses to board the dogs in a kennel.

We were not going to do anything more than provide our itinerary to them once we got there and tell them, if you want to join us, this is where we will be. In other words, they would be too broke at Christmas to join us. But, her mom is now talking about getting a hotel room in Orlando and doing MVMCP with us and doing Epcot. This totally sucks in my mind. It's going to affect the whole trip and make it where I dread it completely. I am seriously considering cancelling the trip. (Yes, it's that bad.)

My honey said that she would tell her mom that this was going to be a just us vacation, but I think that it will only worsen the problems between her mother and I. I love my honey. I am head over heals nuts about her. But, this is just driving me mad.
Mickey

 

[jfulcer]

I think that you should worry less about what your mother in law wants and cares about and more about what you and your honey need and want.

Tell your MIL that you want to spend time with your honey on this trip, and that it's a trip for just the two of you. Apoligize and offer to take her along another time when you can plan it around her.

She <i>will</i> get over it, especially if your honey says the same thing to her without sounding like trying to give in to you. It's time to cut a few purse strings, and let your honey be YOUR honey and not your MIL's.

 

[mickeysaver]

Well, the night certainly went downhill after I signed off. But, the bright side is that my honey told her mom flat out that we wanted this to be just our vacation. It was received well enough. Her mom was bummed, but understood. The beans were spilled about taking her to the Afternoon Tea at the Grand Floridian and she loved the idea. I was given full credit for thinking it up and wanting to invite her along, so for now, best I can tell, things are going to be ok.

Man, I hate drama. Mickey

 

[Disney Doll]

Aren't relatives swell??? I have a couple of "busters" myself!!!!