Sister Vent: Enough

[eeyore kelly]

I'll gladly trade you sisters!

No thank you, and don't worry about highjacking the thread, nice to know that there are worse than mine out there. Sorry about your sis though. My, what a mess!

UMMMM, can I ask what you did that was so awful that your neice had to tattle on you?

I corrected her and hurt her feelings. But it is okay for my sis to correct my children

Just where do you draw the line if you don't draw it early on.

I guess the schools and justice system can do it later on. My sis sure won't.

Unfortunately, many people have close friends who are as supportive and caring as a family SHOULD be. Just because someone is blood related doesn't mean they are healthy to be around.

I have that in my life, but my sis is threaten by that relationship and talks bad about my friend and her kids. I just let it go in one ear and out the other, because my sis has no creditability in my eyes.

 

[Disney Doll]

I have never been one of those folks who say "Family is everything". I do not think being related to someone absolves them from the consequences of bad behavior.

DH has a sister who is a nutjob. The lasy go around we had had me telling her that if she did a certain thing she was threatening to do, the I would write her off as if she never existed. That has kept her in line in recent months, because she is deathly afraid that I would do it, and I would. I told her she adds nothign to my life, so if she aggravates me in any way, she's out. For good.

 

[dianeschlicht]

It sounds to me like you need to put a little distance between you and your sister for awhile. Maybe NO calls or visits for a few months at least. I guess I wouldn't want my kids tattling all the time either. WHen our kids tried to tattle on ANYONE, I always stopped them and told them they had to tell something on themselves before I would listen to them tell something about someone else.

 

[eeyore kelly]

Dh and I have talked about all of this today, and he and I decided that my sister and her family expend to much of my energy. I quit. I am going to keep my family away from hers. We have a different set of values and objectives, especially when it comes to children. She can have her life, and I'll have mine.

 

[Cindyluwho]

OK, we get that you're angry but it's killing me....What is it you did that the kid ratted you out?

 

[eeyore kelly]

I told her to keep her voice down the baby (my other neice) just fell asleep. She tattled, and cried. My sister told me I hurt my neices feelings, and I asked "Your Point is? I also told her children shouldn't tattle on adults and she is encouraging it. That's when I was accused of not liking my niece.

 

[Mermaid02]

I wouldn't like being "tattled" on by my niece either. I'd tell my sister "Yep, I corrected her and if she does______ in my presence again... I'll correct her again."

Sometimes I enjoy being an only child.

 

[chrissyk]

I have never been one of those folks who say "Family is everything". I do not think being related to someone absolves them from the consequences of bad behavior.

DH has a sister who is a nutjob. The lasy go around we had had me telling her that if she did a certain thing she was threatening to do, the I would write her off as if she never existed. That has kept her in line in recent months, because she is deathly afraid that I would do it, and I would. I told her she adds nothign to my life, so if she aggravates me in any way, she's out. For good.

I agree with you. We had to write my nutjob SIL off after she made her most recent litany of threats. We also had to go to the police because of what she was threatening. It was a lovely situation. Unfortunately, MIL sided with her nutjob daughter, tried to insist that my DH "forgive and forget" because SIL is "family," and generally harrassed my DH. As a result, she too has earned herself a one-way ticket out of our our lives. I have a feeling that we're not the only family that these 2 have run out of their lives, too. At a certain point, you have to accept that you can't fix crazy and move on.

I love your line about your SIL adding nothing to your life. Sometimes that is SO true!!

 

[eeyore kelly]

you have to accept that you can't fix crazy and move on.

My new motto! Thanks!!!

 

[Serena]

Kelly, I"m sorry. I wish I had some advice for you.

I used to babysit my neice and nephew and yes, I would correct them. Well, I found out later that I was "mean aunt laurie" because I actually expected them to behave in my home.

I don't have much contact with my ex-sil now. My neice is older now and actually likes me. My nephew is still growing and he's learning I'm not an ogre.

 

[chrissyk]

My new motto! Thanks!!!

You're welcome I learned that motto the hard way

 

[eeyore kelly]

I was "mean aunt laurie" because I actually expected them to behave in my home

I know the feeling my sister and niece call me "mean aunt Kelly"

 

[lbgraves]

Family can ruin your life. Get rid of any & all toxic relationships. I did & now I am free of the stress that resulted from my birth parents being in our life. My sister is bipolar/manic with an ADHD DD and a DS who she is trying to link ACD & other disorders to. I hear from her every couple months. We haven't seen them in over two years now. Her life still upsets me & I feel sorry for the kids...BUT it is HER life & SHE makes the choices, whether they are good or bad. The only "family" I have are our friends, who have been supportive over the years.

 

[bubba's mom]

So, I've found the "i hate my sister" thread!! this is definately the thread for me! my sister ranks up there with the "i don't get it" ones?? the crap she is putting our family thru......and DH's one sister too.... uugghhh...why can't we ship them ALL off to an island somewhere and let them all co-habitate and co-miserate together??? seems to be one in every family......and fwiw, i wouldn't trade my sister to any of you for anything.....i just couldn't put a "friend" through that.....i love ya all too much!

 

[FayeW]

Both of my sisters are crazy, and one is a pathological liar to boot! ( Either that, or she lives her life with her head up her *** and doesn't know truth from fiction!) That one called me 3 yrs ago to "say goodbye" if you get my drift. Turns out she hadn't paid their mortgage in about 6 mths and the bank was foreclosing. Her husband didn't know anything about it and she was afraid that he would divorce her when he found out. I called my parents in a panic, and they gave her the money to bring everything up to date. Turns out this was the SECOND time they nearly lost the house ( her MIL & SIL bailed them out the first time). I set up a payment schedule, including interest, for her to repay my parents. She paid for about 2 months, and then never paid again. A year later, the bank is foreclosing for a THIRD time!! This time they were able to list the house and sell it before the time ran out. She told my parents a bunch of lies about the lawyer knowing all about her debt to them, and he would send them a cheque from the proceeds of the sale, etc. The web of lies was outrageous, and only after my father finally told my BIL what was going on did they get their money (they are retired and on a fixed income, they needed to have the money back!). Somehow, this all became my parents fault (apparently they should have let her kill herself ) and neither my sister or Bil will speak to them. I wrote these crazy, lying, toxic people out of my life 2 yrs ago, and things are much less stressful!)

 

[Serena]

My sister was a pain until she had her twins, after that we've gotten along just fine.

 

[tiggersmom2]

Both of my sisters are crazy, and one is a pathological liar to boot! ( Either that, or she lives her life with her head up her *** and doesn't know truth from fiction!) That one called me 3 yrs ago to "say goodbye" if you get my drift. Turns out she hadn't paid their mortgage in about 6 mths and the bank was foreclosing. Her husband didn't know anything about it and she was afraid that he would divorce her when he found out. I called my parents in a panic, and they gave her the money to bring everything up to date. Turns out this was the SECOND time they nearly lost the house ( her MIL & SIL bailed them out the first time). I set up a payment schedule, including interest, for her to repay my parents. She paid for about 2 months, and then never paid again. A year later, the bank is foreclosing for a THIRD time!! This time they were able to list the house and sell it before the time ran out. She told my parents a bunch of lies about the lawyer knowing all about her debt to them, and he would send them a cheque from the proceeds of the sale, etc. The web of lies was outrageous, and only after my father finally told my BIL what was going on did they get their money (they are retired and on a fixed income, they needed to have the money back!). Somehow, this all became my parents fault (apparently they should have let her kill herself ) and neither my sister or Bil will speak to them. I wrote these crazy, lying, toxic people out of my life 2 yrs ago, and things are much less stressful!)

Bless your heart sweetie....I believe your sister just might find a soul mate in my oldest brother.

 

[LisaR]

Dh and I have talked about all of this today, and he and I decided that my sister and her family expend to much of my energy. I quit. I am going to keep my family away from hers. We have a different set of values and objectives, especially when it comes to children. She can have her life, and I'll have mine.

I had to do the exact same thing with my sister. She was using up far too much of my energy and the relationship wasn't a positive thing for me. There was always so much drama in her life. While I honestly feel bad and sad that our relationship has ended, my life has been so much more peaceful over the last six months. I felt like I was on a never ending episode of Jerry Springer when she was in my life. Good luck.

Lisa

 

[epcotfan]

Unfortunately, many people have close friends who are as supportive and caring as a family SHOULD be. Just because someone is blood related doesn't mean they are healthy to be around.

 

[Allan]

I have a sister that I didn't see eye to eye with for many many years. We had many battles over trivial things and went long periods of time without speaking but in the last few years we've become very close. My sister died this morning after a brief battle with stave IV breast cancer. Trust me, I can't imagine what we would be going through right now if we didn't have the blessing of the last few days in particular with her.