Single due to Disney.....

[pookie10]

Long story short, i was seeing someone for about 5 months and I was going to take my annual wdw trip and thought it would be fun without my kids. I invited my bf. I paid for a week long trip, staying at poly club level, Coronado and akl. I didn't do anything he would consider childish like parades and character meals... Still the trip was the demise of our relationship and it was ruined for me almost completely. Now I'm single again.. Anyone know the best placd to find a guy who will just get the disney Magic??

 

[perditax]

Lots of red flags in this post. (Why did you have to pay for the whole trip? Why do you have to defend 'childish' things like parades?)

And if one vacation was enough to kill the relationship, it was either a REALLY bad vacation (and switching resorts three times in a week does sound kind of exhausting) or the relationship was already shaky to begin with.

That said, I suspect a lot of people here will be able to relate to having a spouse or SO who really isn't into Disney. But I don't think you should make that the very top criteria for selecting a mate. Maybe just be sure to try to date people who at least love travel and don't actively HATE Disney.

 

[mom2AidanAndEli]

And how did the kids feel about being passed over for a 5-month boyfriend?

 

[amandals2007]

i wouldnt have left my kids home for a guy i was seeing for 5 months but thats just me. thats a lot of moving for a trip and you probably overwhelmed him. and i dont think you should base finding a guy off disney. if they really care about you they will enjoy doing things that make you happy and go with you and maybe end up liking it as much as you do. my ex wasnt into disney but was willing to come with my family and i because its what we do and he wanted to be apart of it and see why it makes me so happy.

 

[JAMIESMITH]

Take your kids. It looks like you have a twelve year old prince and a seven year old princess?

My honey isn't a huge fan of Disney. He goes because he loves me and the trips make our daughter and me happy. He has a good time, but always says he needs a vacation from the vacation once we get home. A man who really loves you (and you kids) will be willing to go places he doesn't love if it makes you happy.

 

[EmmabaRose]

Whole lotta judgement in this here thread. because none of you have ever done the wrong thing when it comes to your kids... Slow sarcastic clap for you.

I dated a guy like this one, got engaged to him in fact. He lived in the States and my last visit to WDW was with him, we fought nearly every other day. In hindsight that was the beginning of the end. Who goes to Disney and doesn't smile at least 50% of the trip!? Anyway he took me for a total ride, ditched me for his childhood sweetheart and I lost a good deal of money on him. I don't have kids but I can very easily see how someone like that could draw you into that kind of thing.

OP, I'm sorry that it didn't work out, I'm sorry that he was a toolbag. But don't let that one guy ruin WDW for you. Go with your kids, make memories with them. And don't stress about having to find another Disnut to be the one. A year down the lane I'm with an awesome guy, who's never been to Florida, never set foot in a disney park, but this week he, my parents and I have decided we're going to WDW for two weeks next year! They are out there!

Although he did say that a trip like that would be "once in a lifetime." So admittedly he's got some learning to do, but there's plenty of time fr that

 

[Birdman1511]

Whole lotta judgement in this here thread. because none of you have ever done the wrong thing when it comes to your kids... Slow sarcastic clap for you.

I thought the exact same thing. Glad somebody said it!

 

[perditax]

(Well, to be fair, women putting all of their self-esteem into 'what guy am I with' is a larger issue that leads to lots of problems, and is a common cause of the guy in question being valued more highly to the woman than her own kids. Not saying that's the case with OP, but I think that's where those posters' reactions come from.)

 

[reaux]

It's not due to Disney, it's due to that guy being a toolbag. You're worth more than that! Especially because YOU paid for everything. Why wasn't he interested in paying for your joint vacation too?!

Good places to meet guys that still have a sense of imagination are, in my opinion, nerdy hobbies! Guys who play Magic the Gathering, watch anime, go to various nerdy conventions (anime, furry, horror, comic, etc) are usually into, or at least accepting of, girls who like Disney magic.

 

[perditax]

I will second the suggestion of nerd dating.

Also they often make bank.

 

[mom2AidanAndEli]

Sorry, but there's no way to put a good spin on, "I know we go to Disney every year, but this year mommy wants to go with her new freeloading boyfriend rather than take you kids." Maybe OP can come back and explain it better so we understand what really happened.

 

[EmmabaRose]

I thought the exact same thing. Glad somebody said it!

It's like word vomit, Disney's values are about treating everyone with respect and kindness, and I hate to see that forgotten on a DISNEY forum.

(Well, to be fair, women putting all of their self-esteem into 'what guy am I with' is a larger issue that leads to lots of problems, and is a common cause of the guy in question being valued more highly to the woman than her own kids. Not saying that's the case with OP, but I think that's where those posters' reactions come from.)

I thought the exact same thing. Glad somebody said it!

I can certainly understand the concern, I have family members who have done similar things. I just think the approach could have been a bit kinder. The OP came here looking for some reassurance, and she got judged. None of us have any idea of the whole picture, so what's the point in being rude?

 

[smiths02]

I think a week long trip with someone you have been seeing 5 months is moving too fast. I am not trying to insult you, OP, it just seems like that might be the problem. Perhaps you go all in too quickly? Dating someone and spending a week with someone is totally different.

I am also concerned that you made sure not to do "childish" things...but you have a 7 year old and a 12 year old. Any man you date will have to be willing to be apart of childish things sometimes (Disney fan or not).

My DH has no Disney obsession, but he likes vacationing there. I would never do 3 resort split stay with a first-time, though.
I would personally also save a Disney trip for me and my kids or for the whole family once I met the right guy. I would go on a shorter, more romantic trip (weekend getaway, cruise, etc.) while I was just dating someone.

 

[disneyfantotheend]

My guy (hubby of 21 years) was not a Disney fan at all. But I got him hooked quickly. Now he is asking when is the next trip way before I even think about it. So don't base finding a guy on him liking Disney, base it on him truly loving you and wanting to make you happy. Good luck finding the right match!

 

[verleniahall]

I am also concerned that you made sure not to do "childish" things...but you have a 7 year old and a 12 year old. Any man you date will have to be willing to be apart of childish things sometimes (Disney fan or not).

I agree with this

 

[EmmabaRose]

Sorry, but there's no way to put a good spin on, "I know we go to Disney every year, but this year mommy wants to go with her new freeloading boyfriend rather than take you kids." Maybe OP can come back and explain it better so we understand what really happened.

And I suppose you're a perfect parent? You've never done anything that could be considered detrimental to their emotional well-being?

People in glass houses and all that...

I'm not saying the choice she made was right in the situation, she made a mistake. We're human, and while some mistakes are inarguably more costly than others, I just fail to see the point in being unnecessarily rude to someone on the internet who you will likely never meet.

I don't mean to be rude or upset anybody, I just thought some of the reactions on here were a bit unfair.

 

[JohndeV]

To be short, if you are single because you love Disney then you are better off without your boyfriend. If you love each other you should be happy for your other half to do the things that he/she loves to do. If your boyfriend likes Disney or not shouldn't have any effect on your relationship. My wife doesn't get the Disney magic either and we're together for 20 years.

To answer your last question: how about this place?

 

[pookie10]

Lots of red flags in this post. (Why did you have to pay for the whole trip? Why do you have to defend 'childish' things like parades?)

And if one vacation was enough to kill the relationship, it was either a REALLY bad vacation (and switching resorts three times in a week does sound kind of exhausting) or the relationship was already shaky to begin with.

That said, I suspect a lot of people here will be able to relate to having a spouse or SO who really isn't into Disney. But I don't think you should make that the very top criteria for selecting a mate. Maybe just be sure to try to date people who at least love travel and don't actively HATE Disney.

I guess I'm glad he tried? And he didn't know he'd hate it.. Turns out.. He hates kids lol. Big red flag

 

[pookie10]

And how did the kids feel about being passed over for a 5-month boyfriend?

They didn't care. It wasn't like that. They get to go in the fall. This trip was spontaneous due to me declining the college program.

 

[pookie10]

i wouldnt have left my kids home for a guy i was seeing for 5 months but thats just me. thats a lot of moving for a trip and you probably overwhelmed him. and i dont think you should base finding a guy off disney. if they really care about you they will enjoy doing things that make you happy and go with you and maybe end up liking it as much as you do. my ex wasnt into disney but was willing to come with my family and i because its what we do and he wanted to be apart of it and see why it makes me so happy.

I didn't leave them home for some guy. Our family trip is coming up in the fall. They are 8 and 13. neither wanted to go, although im sure if they would have it would have been fun for them. This was my first time ever going anywhere without them. As a full time working and full time in school adult im entitled