Should i go anyways???????

[daystar]

Hi,
I just found out that my dh doesn't want to go on vacation next year in which was planned out for us to go back to WDW....He's kind of a home body so he says he doesn't want to go on vacation every year...We were suppose to go to WDW this year but he decided that we should make a change and go to Hershey Pa and then to Gettysburg, Pa...Now he enjoyed his time in WDW when we went so i don't know what the problem is...He was like this before we went to disney but when we got there he had a really good time....My oldest son is the same way either he doesn't want to go to WDW because he says it's for little kids or he just don't want to go because he will miss his friends, he's turning 14 this year...
Now here's my question to all you spouses, if i were to decide to go any ways and leave my dh and oldest son at home and take my youngest son with me to WDW, would that be a bad move for the family???Has anyone did this before???I'm really thinking about doing this...Only because i enjoy it so much and so does my youngest son....What do you think???

 

[MKCP5]

I think you need to find out what the real issue is here. Is it really about disney? or is it about money or wanting to try new thing, control? who knows? But vacations are about being togther. Being a family, getting out of your day to day environment and reconnecting as a family, away from all the distractions of home. See if he wants to go on any vacation anywhere before you decide to leave him at home : )

 

[jeast]

my stepfather posted a little mirrored sticker on the bathroom mirror when I was a teenager. It said, "you are looking at the face of the person responsible for your happiness".

Make your plans, encourage the rest of your family to decide to go. Leave that option open. Tell them it's okay if they don't appreciate vacations like you do but you are different and owe it to yourself and your younger son to add richness to your lives.

my dh doesn't really like to travel or add hassle to his life. He has already traveled some in the marine corps. I really wanted to. He was a big enough man to let me backpack through Europe with a friend (I was a teacher). I will always be grateful to him for not holding me back from something that really interested me that didn't interest him. Maybe you could explain it in that vein? Just my HO.

 

[alisonbestford]

If it's not about anything important, like money, but more about personal preference, I'd go
DH isn't too bothered about holidaying with DD (6) and myself but I try to work him round because his health is poor and it would be much harder trying to find someone to spend time with him whilst we were away than leave him asleep in a hotel room for a few hours until we all meet up .......
If there are really no major issues I'd say 'GO'
A chronic family illness helps you see black and white I guess but, IMHO, 'GO'

 

[daystar]

Hi again,
The only issue is that my dh is a home body he could careless to go any where....I have just always loved to travel any where...The only place he like to go is to race his Atv....He is complusive when it comes to stuff like that or even working on it so i really think that he doesn't want to interupt what he's doing....I don't think it's a control thing because he lets me do what ever i want and doesn't question me about it...Money is not an issue trust me if he can put top of the line parts into his ATV i'm sure i can swing going to WDW...
I just feel that i need to do something that i want to do...I loved spending family time all together but what do you do when the others don't want to go along with you???

 

[tessqt]

Go anyway!!! My dh is not a traveller either, unless it is something he wants to do, like stand out on hot asphalt in the middle of summer and practice/play with model airplanes. Go figure, but I don't care as long as he understands (he does reluctantly) that that is not a vacation for me and allow me to do what I want. I have taken our 2 kids without Daddy to Disney 2x. We are finally going later this year as a family. We had been 2x, honeymoon and 2nd anniversary, we are coming up to 14 years! So I don't think it is Disney, we had great times on those trips.

Our kids will be 6 1/2 and 8 1/2, when we go in the Fall. 2 years ago when I requested a family vacation, he did not want to spend money when kids were smaller and the kids were "too young" for Disney. I know, I know. Anyway, his vacation suggestion....Williamsburg? Go Figure! Disaster.

You will have a great time with your 6 year old, go without them both!

 

[wide awake]

Plan it for you and the younger DS, but don't be surprised if DH and older DS decide that they want to go. My DH is in the AF, gone quite a bit, really likes staying at home. I have a stressful job which allows me NO relaxation unless I am away from home...far away...so DH understands when I book for distant vacations. But what usually happens is that when he sees what a good time I will be having with DS and my mom he decides he wants to go along too...which I sort of figured, and booked two rooms to begin with. I think that DHs sometimes need to know that we're capable of having a good time without them, that we have our own interests, and that if they respect ours we'll respect theirs. I'm not interested in everything DH is, and vice versa...there are some vacations I want to do that I know he wouldn't go along with, but we trust and respect each other. Just because you're married doesn't mean you need to be joined at the hip. Do what you want and have a good time !!!!!!

 

[GJM]

I would go with your younger DS. I am probably going in Sept. or Aug with my DS. This will be my first trip with just DS, but DH doesn't know if he can get from work and I want to go for a couple of days and my DS loves Disney. If DH wants to go great but if he doesn't why shouldn't I go.

 

[Brendita]

Same problem here.
My husband would rather stay home & work in the yard.
We only have 1 DS together.
He's 11 love Disney rides & all the other great stuff.
So we take off without him.
He stays @ home & babysits .
He's totally Ok with it.

 

[dismom9761]

My DH's attitude toward WDW is"been there done that".When I started to talk about the next trip he said he would rather not go.So..Feb.06 I am taking the 4 kids and he is staying home.We will take a short trip in the mtns. or beach as a family.

 

[TNKBELL]

Don't get me wrong, Disney is awesome!!! Hershey is really cool too, I went 11 years ago, and when we drove into town it smelled like chocolate!!! I couldn't believe my nose!! It's a nice place with a pretty cool theme park and chocolate "factory" and huge shopping place. It's probably even better now! As much as I like Disney, Hershey is one other place I would choose to go also if my family really wanted to go there. I agree with some of the other posters that say vacation is for families to be together. Can you go to Disney next year? Or maybe find out if your DH really wants to go at all. SOmetimes if you give in and say ok to Hershey, he might admit that he really just doesn't want to go on vacation at all and then you can go to WDW guilt free!! Good Luck! This year is our last trip to WDW for awhile because my DH says he's had enough! So of course I'm already thinking about our next trip in 2010! (maybe)

 

[daystar]

Hi,
This year my family was suppose to go to WDW but my dh says he would like to try something else which is Hershey and Gettysburg....So i said ok so that next year it would be my turn for picking vacations....So now he tells me that he would just like to stay home and not go on vacation at all...I will miss not having the whole family together....I do believe in spending family vacation all together but my dh isn't into traveling and i love to travel...Now my oldest son just told me he wants to go now, which i'm very happy about....Only if i can get my dh to change his mind...I know that he wont only because it took me a long time to get him to go the first time we went...He could careless to go anywhere other than staying at home and doing some kind of work...Thanks again for your replies

 

[tlbwriter]

I say, you go and he stays. That way everyone gets to do what they really wanted to do, and everyone is happy.

 

[patrenoe]

daystar, My dh sounds a little like yours. He loves staying home and doing other things such as; fishing, boating and playing golf. To my dh vacation is not going to WDW and standing in lines in the hot sun being around thousands of people and waiting to get on rides, waiting to get seated for dinners, waiting to go or return from parks. I don't know whats wrong with him He has always supported me when I have chosen to take the other family members or for solo trips to WDW. Please have a wonderful time planning and enjoying your trip with your ds.

 

[daystar]

Hi,
Thanks for all your replies they do mean alot to me....Now i can start to plan my vacation with my boys and not feel guilty leaving my dh at home...Hey who knows maybe he will change his mind ...Thanks again...

 

[swilshire]

If it won't start a family rift, then by all means go. I've found I often enjoy leaving reluctant family members at home more than trying to make them happy on trips.

I agree that vacations are for families, but I've also learned that time alone with one child is very special. Take the son who will enjoy it and plan something for the whole family at another time.

Sheila