Sharing hotel rooms with coworkers?

[cijay]

Just sayin'...

I can't believe people would be willing to quit a job they like/are secure in rather than spend a night with a co-worker. (It's not like the company is trolling the lobby for someone to share a room, they know this person.) If there IS a reason to not want to room with 'that' specific person, I would understand and it'd be an issue to take up with your manager. I couldn't room with a smoker. The stink of residue on their clothes is always there. But the original post here just said 'in general'. Likewise with the car sharing. Of course there would be reasons to not want to car share - again, the smoking thing, unsafe driver/unsafe car etc.

Many are saying they like the quiet and privacy after working all day. Wouldn't you give your co-worker's needs the same respect? Perhaps they'd be the same. You can be alone in a room with another person. Put your headphones on, read a book...whatever you would do if you were alone.

Transgender wasn't an issue in the original posts. No sense bringing your own biases and aversions into it. Would I care? No. It's a business trip, not an orgy. I AM able to be in the same room with someone without the topic of their sexual preferences and identity coming up at all.

It is strange when you live alone (which, I'm assuming all the people who say 'no way I want my privacy' do, otherwise, how much privacy can you get in your own home?) because every sound in the room is foreign. I just say that if it's a business trip and treated as such - not just a wild weekend away with no responsibilities, it's not worth quitting a job I like over.

 

[cabanafrau]

You have your own personal sleep space - it's a bed! And you have a private grooming space - a bathroom with a locking door.

What you're asking for instead is solitude. A place to refresh and recharge without the presence of other human beings.

That's essentially an introvert trait. Nothing wrong with it! Introverts recharge by being alone, while extroverts draw their energy from being around others. An classic introvert says, "I've been around these people all day. I need a break!" A classic extrovert says, "Yay, it's a slumber party!"

It doesn't mean you're solidly one thing or another - we all have introverted and extroverted tendencies, mixed in different proportions.

As for the sleeping in a pile like puppies... it was cold, and wet, and no one had slept in the past 24 hours. So very logical under the circumstances! And an extreme example, I agree. I just thought it was cruel to stick me out alone in the cold, just because I was a girl.

I disagree that qualifies as an introvert trait/extrovert trait. I know plenty of people who need to get up in the morning and have their coffee and get ready for their day without chatting or interacting with anyone, yet are extremely extroverted individuals. Making that pronouncement by that small of a measure makes no sense to me.

 

[nkereina]

For those of you with no qualms about sharing a room with a co-worker, what about going #2? Seriously. I don't want to smell that from my co-worker and I would not be comfortable enough to do that with a co-worker three feet away from me.

I have a professional relationship with my co-workers and not much more. It would be odd and uncomfortable for my co-worker to see me in my jammies with no makeup and messy hair, maybe hear me snore or talk in my sleep, and then deal with the next morning's "bathroom routine" if you know what I mean.

While it wouldn't be the end of the world nor would I quit my job over it, I don't think it's appropriate for a company to force this on their employees. If it's to save a buck, they are essentially only saving a couple hundred dollars. And if the savings is more than that, that means employees are taking extended trips or traveling frequently which makes this policy all that much worse. My company gives us a price limit for hotels, based on the region, and that's how they control the travel budget.

 

[YachtClubWoman]

In my opinion, requiring employees to share a room when traveling shows a lack of respect for the employees. I would also question financial stability if they are pinching pennies on hotel rooms. I travel often for work and have never thought that would be a possibility of having to share a room.

 

[Magpie]

I disagree that qualifies as an introvert trait/extrovert trait. I know plenty of people who need to get up in the morning and have their coffee and get ready for their day without chatting or interacting with anyone, yet are extremely extroverted individuals. Making that pronouncement by that small of a measure makes no sense to me.

I wasn't making any pronouncement about anyone in particular. I said everyone's a mix of both.

I rather like this article from Psychology Today, about what it means to be (at least a little bit) an introvert: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201403/nine-signs-you-re-really-introvert

 

[Andtototoo]

I have had to share with another woman and it's never been a big issue except when the woman was a sworn enemy of mine. I ended up telling my boss that I simply could not share a room with this person because I could not trust her to see me in pajamas, when I first woke up, etc without taking pictures and posting them around. (Yes, she was a prize. A real prize.)

My husband has, however, had numerous problems due to men snoring. One example: He went on one trip and had to share a room with his boss (which is really unacceptable due to power issues) and literally did not sleep for 5 nights because the guy snored like a freight train. Guy knew he snored like a freight train and thought it was funny. (Even though he admitted that a chief reason for his divorce was his snoring. Thought his wife was a "princess" for having issues with the fact that she could not find anywhere in the house to sleep due to his snoring.) My husband tried pillow over the head, ear plugs. He tried to sleep in the tub in the bathroom. No go -- the noise was just too loud. Guy snored so badly that the rooms on either side of them called the front desk to ask their room to quiet it down. My poor husband ended up nodding off during conference workshops and so on because he was so exhausted. Boss got angry at him because they were suppoesd to drive from place to place and my dh was supposed to be the driver and he refused because he was so sleepy.

Boss tried to file a reprimand and when HR got wind of the situation and then Risk Management got involved, things changed. They did a study and found that snoring was a real issue amongst coworkers on trips. They also decided that the potential for sexual harassment or regular harassment (like in my situation) was too high. So They put rules in place that forbade people from sharing rooms anymore.

 

[Chocolate Cake]

For those of you with no qualms about sharing a room with a co-worker, what about going #2? Seriously. I don't want to smell that from my co-worker and I would not be comfortable enough to do that with a co-worker three feet away from me.

I am laughing about this, because neither my husband nor myself uses the master bathroom for "that" once we have settled in for the night. Nope. Go down the hall. And when we are in a hotel, well I hate that aspect of it. And then I am overcome by air freshener.

Can't imagine this with a co-worker.

My professional life is just that. I don't find it very professional to have pajamas on with my co-worker snoring to the right of me. I find that weird.

 

[aprilgail]

You were fortunate to apparently have other options.

just didn't go away for college.

 

[mom2rtk]

just didn't go away for college.

I guess we all have our line in the sand.

 

[sam_gordon]

For those of you with no qualms about sharing a room with a co-worker, what about going #2? Seriously. I don't want to smell that from my co-worker and I would not be comfortable enough to do that with a co-worker three feet away from me.

Crap happens? While it has happened, it's rare someone will go "#2" and stink up the entire room. Turn the bathroom fan on. I also don't think I've been in a hotel room where the toilet is 3' away from the bed/couch whatever (maybe on a cruise ship).

While it wouldn't be the end of the world nor would I quit my job over it, I don't think it's appropriate for a company to force this on their employees. If it's to save a buck, they are essentially only saving a couple hundred dollars. And if the savings is more than that, that means employees are taking extended trips or traveling frequently which makes this policy all that much worse. My company gives us a price limit for hotels, based on the region, and that's how they control the travel budget.

One of our large events, we get 16 rooms (and put two people in each). Each room is ~$1,000 for the weekend (four nights). And you can't get much cheaper. A "normal" night in one of these rooms is $70, the priced is raised for the event we attend. I'd MUCH rather share a room than stay in a "cheap" hotel.

Don't get me wrong, I prefer being by myself, but if my choice is some cheap flea bag motel for $50/night or a Hampton Inn/Holiday Inn Express/Marriott/etc for $100 and I have to share the room, "Hi, roomie!"

 

[cabanafrau]

I wasn't making any pronouncement about anyone in particular. I said everyone's a mix of both.

I rather like this article from Psychology Today, about what it means to be (at least a little bit) an introvert: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201403/nine-signs-you-re-really-introvert

Precisely the point I was making -- you stated in this thread that those who want to room solo are CLASSIC introverts. As I've said, I don't think that factor alone is enough of a measure to make that pronouncement, which is the same quibble I'd have with the blogger's individual factors, one factor alone isn't very determinative in my view. The sum of the parts is much more telling to me.

 

[Magpie]

Precisely the point I was making -- you stated in this thread that those who want to room solo are CLASSIC introverts. As I've said, I don't think that factor alone is enough of a measure to make that pronouncement, which is the same quibble I'd have with the blogger's individual factors, one factor alone isn't very determinative in my view. The sum of the parts is much more telling to me.

Well, I'm hardly going to say that needing to be alone in order to recharge is an extroverted trait, am I? For the record, I am not saying that everyone who wants their own room is, like, totally an introvert, so I'm sorry if it came across like that.

As folks on this thread have made clear, there can be other reasons for wanting your own room besides needing your alone time. Maybe it's just that you can't stand your coworkers. Or you don't want anyone to see you in your facial and cucumber slices at the end of the day. Or you don't want them to know that you perform I'm a Little Teapot for your kids over Skype every night. Or you snore, and you're a considerate human being.

Finally, what's so bad about being a little bit introverted anyway? "I need my alone time!" is a perfectly valid thing to say.

 

[Flight]

Long ago had to share a room with a co worker once. I had to endure the conversation over the telephone with their spouse. I was not happy. It was a bit weird.

 

[Marlyn]

This thread makes me shudder....I hate sharing my space. I have travelled with my parents in the past and can't even stand that. They're in their 80s and have quirks. I just prefer my own space. Sharing with a coworker would drive me batty. I don't mind sharing a hotel room with my DH, my sister, a close friend (although only a select few) or my children. That's about it.

 

[Jennasis]

I sleep naked, sweat blood, suffer from both extreme night terrors and aggressive night farts...

Who wants to bunk with me?

 

[cabanafrau]

Well, I'm hardly going to say that needing to be alone in order to recharge is an extroverted trait, am I? For the record, I am not saying that everyone who wants their own room is, like, totally an introvert, so I'm sorry if it came across like that.

As folks on this thread have made clear, there can be other reasons for wanting your own room besides needing your alone time. Maybe it's just that you can't stand your coworkers. Or you don't want anyone to see you in your facial and cucumber slices at the end of the day. Or you don't want them to know that you perform I'm a Little Teapot for your kids over Skype every night. Or you snore, and you're a considerate human being.

Finally, what's so bad about being a little bit introverted anyway? "I need my alone time!" is a perfectly valid thing to say.

You're certainly shifting your statement. I've understood from the beginning there are many reasons people might not want to share a room with a coworker, and that having a little alone time is perfectly valid and necessary for everyone, extroverts included.

My perspective from the outset was that not wanting to share a room with a coworker doesn't point to a person being an introvert automatically. It may indeed be one of many factors common to those who are predominantly introverts, but the preference in and of itself doesn't necessarily indicate anything about introvert and/or extrovert tendencies overall. I submit you will find a great deal of extroverts not ready to happily sign onto sharing a room with a coworker. I also didn't indicate there was anything negative or preferable in being either introverted or extroverted.

I simply think it's jumping to conclusions to label anybody anything based on such flimsy information. The same way it would be jumping to a conclusion to presume that I as a female would have something to be concerned about with regards to sharing a hotel room with a coworker who was male, lesbian or transgender simply based on those labels. For me they all would be equally unwanted for precisely the same reason -- none of which has anything to do with the information their label provides or is inherently concerning to me on its face.

 

[cabanafrau]

I sleep naked, sweat blood, suffer from both extreme night terrors and aggressive night farts...

Who wants to bunk with me?

That's a big no.

Of course it was also a big no before your resume also!

 

[frndshpcptn]

No way. No how. No sharing rooms.

 

[Magpie]

You're certainly shifting your statement. I've understood from the beginning there are many reasons people might not want to share a room with a coworker, and that having a little alone time is perfectly valid and necessary for everyone, extroverts included.

My perspective from the outset was that not wanting to share a room with a coworker doesn't point to a person being an introvert automatically. It may indeed be one of many factors common to those who are predominantly introverts, but the preference in and of itself doesn't necessarily indicate anything about introvert and/or extrovert tendencies overall. I submit you will find a great deal of extroverts not ready to happily sign onto sharing a room with a coworker. I also didn't indicate there was anything negative or preferable in being either introverted or extroverted.

I simply think it's jumping to conclusions to label anybody anything based on such flimsy information. The same way it would be jumping to a conclusion to presume that I as a female would have something to be concerned about with regards to sharing a hotel room with a coworker who was male, lesbian or transgender simply based on those labels. For me they all would be equally unwanted for precisely the same reason -- none of which has anything to do with the information their label provides or is inherently concerning to me on its face.

I don't think I'm shifting positions.

What I originally said was: "I'm obviously more on the extroverted side of things, and wasn't taking into full account of the needs of introverts."

Then when someone said they didn't understand what introvert and extrovert has to do with it, I explained...

"Introverts typically need time to decompress at the end of a day of dealing with people. They need their "alone time" to recharge. A lot of people have listed this as a reason for needing their own room. I wasn't referring to you specifically."

I've subsequently tried to explain that introversion and extroversion is all about where you get your energy from. And I've tried to say that people are complex creatures who are never totally one thing or another. Also, I haven't "labeled" anyone. In fact, my very second post on this topic says, "I wasn't referring to you specifically." Or specifically anyone else for that matter.

In any case, rest assured, I am not calling you an introvert.

 

[mjkacmom]

I ,iced in a dorm for 4 years in college, same roommate, shared bathroom down the hall. That was the last timed I shared a room with a non-family member, until DH. Heck, I won't volunteer to chaparone overnight school trips, because I'm not sharing a room with another parent. Until this thread, I had no idea that some businesses made co-workers bunk together. DH travels about a dozen times a year, but always has his own room.