Here are some more. This first one was on last night.
Jerry: You got gonorrhea from a tractor? And you call that the tractor story?
Girlfriend: Yeah, my boyfriend said I got it while I was riding the tractor in my bathing suit.
Bubble boy episode, "I'm sorry, the card says MOOPS"
Reverse peep holes
Bizarro Jerry
But are you still master of your domain
The urban sombrero
Video store employee: We have a wide variety of Gene Picks.
Elaine: Gene's trash.
Video store employee: I'm Gene.
I lover that episode where Kramer gets the big bag of condoms. George takes one and Kramer offers Elaine 100. Her response: What am I a hooker?
Donna Chang You know you're not Chinese.
Yeah, you better give me the insurance. Because I'm gonna beat the hell out of this car.
Jerry: I need to talk to you about my friend, Dr. Tim Whatley. I think he's converted to Judaism just for the jokes.
Priest: And this offends you as a Jewish person?
Jerry: No, it offends me as a comedian.
George's ATM code: BOSCO
Surveys show that the #1 fear of Americans is public speaking. #2 is death. Death is #2. That means that at a funeral, the average American would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy.
Morty Seinfeld: Jerry, this is the most thoughtful gift you've ever given me.
Jerry: You know, I bought you a Cadillac... Twice.
Newman, you wouldn't eat broccoli if it was deep fried in chocolate sauce.
Seven Costanza
Who buys an umbrella anyway? You can get them for free at the coffee shop in those metal cans.
Your Nana is missing because she's been passing those bum checks all over town and she finally pissed off the wrong people.