Seems like everyone has their hands out...

[Marseeya]

Now that I remember, I saw a Dateline or 20/20 special on mattresses. Many companies would take old mattresses and recover them and sell them as new. They did a whole undercover thing on this business and it was really nasty what they found in those mattresses.

I don't think it's against the law to sell a used mattress, only to recover an old mattress and sell it as new.

I didn't know there was a problem with that. Early in our marriage, we'd bought a mattress that we were convinced was used with a new cover on it. Within just a week it was saggy and lumpy like an old mattress.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

My favorite (note sarcasm) is when you to go the grocery store and are literally ambushed by kids selling stuff for fundraising. Then you get ambushed AGAIN when you go out.

I did a lot of my shopping through Amazon.com and whatnot this year so I haven't done a lot of "malling." We've only seen one bell ringer so far this year and it was at Wal-Mart (I know I know, but detergent and things like that are cheaper there in this area). All she said was a cheerful "good morning" as we went in and a cheerful "have a great day" as we left. I thought it was nice

But I do agree about the other stuff. It's getting out of hand. Oh and BTW, I think donating your time is AWESOME!

 

[Chattyaholic]

I do give change most times when I see a Salvation Army bell ringer, but I do hate being asked at stores to donate a dollar for various things. Recently at McDonalds the employee asked me if I wanted to "buy a hand" for $1 and I said "no, thank you." She looked disgustedly at me and said "it's for the children!" I just stared at her and waited for our food. I heard her ask a couple other people, then the manager must have spoken to her because she was spending more time bugging people to donate than she was getting people's food and she stopped asking.

One time leaving Wal-Mart the Shriners were asking for donations and I just said "no, thank you" and he said "well, I hope you never need our services then!" I am usually not one for confrontations and will back away from situations like that but I stopped, turned around and told him he had no idea how many various charities we give to throughout the year and he had no right to say anything to me after I politely had told him no. I SHOULD have walked back into the store and spoken to the manager about it but didn't. I understand that organizations depend on charity, but when someone says "no, thank you" that should be the end of it.

 

[bicker]

Recently at McDonalds the employee asked me if I wanted to "buy a hand" for $1 and I said "no, thank you." She looked disgustedly at me and said "it's for the children!" I just stared at her and waited for our food.

My reply would be, "Gosh, you are incredibly rude." I think leaving these things hanging doesn't project the right message, as if you were actually abashed by what they said. I respect people right up to the point they disrespect me, no further.

One time leaving Wal-Mart the Shriners were asking for donations and I just said "no, thank you" and he said "well, I hope you never need our services then!"

Something like that would be more than enough to ensure that I never donate to a specific charity. It indicates to me that the charity isn't charitable. Charities would be well-advised to train their solicitors better.

 

[Tigger_Magic]

My reply would be, "Gosh, you are incredibly rude." I think leaving these things hanging doesn't project the right message, as if you were actually abashed by what they said. I respect people right up to the point they disrespect me, no further.

Well said! I tend to avoid confrontation IRL, but situations like the McDonalds or Shriners do need to be confronted. I would probably go so far as to speak to the store manager if treated so disrespectfully by an employee.

Something like that would be more than enough to ensure that I never donate to a specific charity. It indicates to me that the charity isn't charitable. Charities would be well-advised to train their solicitors better.

ITA! I've encountered many solicitors who were kind and respectful, even when I did not donate. Those situations left a better feeling with me about the charity than the few who implied I was being mean and cheap for not forking over some cash.

 

[Alicnwondrln]

also at work i donated 52 1 for every week I work and it come right outt amy paycheck and shaws donated it to the united way
i forgot about that one

 

[Marseeya]

Well said! I tend to avoid confrontation IRL, but situations like the McDonalds or Shriners do need to be confronted. I would probably go so far as to speak to the store manager if treated so disrespectfully by an employee. ITA! I've encountered many solicitors who were kind and respectful, even when I did not donate. Those situations left a better feeling with me about the charity than the few who implied I was being mean and cheap for not forking over some cash.

My problem isn't really that I'm afraid to speak up about things, although I am definitely non-confrontational. It's just that when something like that happens, I'm usually very stunned and can't think of a thing to reply until later!

 

[Marseeya]

My favorite (note sarcasm) is when you to go the grocery store and are literally ambushed by kids selling stuff for fundraising. Then you get ambushed AGAIN when you go out.

I usually won't donate to kids when they're just holding out a bucket expecting cash, but if they're selling things or doing a car wash, I'll go out of my way to give them something. Mostly I try to stick to my local school kids because that's where I went to school and where my kids go to school.

That's another thing that's gotten out of hand too, is the school fundraising. We're lucky that our PTA puts on one big fundraiser each year and it pays for a lot of things -- enrichment programs, teacher education, improvements to the school, a folder for every child, an assignment book for every child, and field trips in certain grades (plus many other things I can't remember). What's sad is this is stuff the district used to be able to pay for on its own dollar. But there are other schools that have a fundraiser every single time you turn around -- it gets old for the kids, the parents, AND the community.

I've already talked to my DH about this, but when I start teaching my paycheck (all $20k of it with my masters ) will go towards paying off student loans and putting the money right into my classroom (books, supplies, activities) for the kids.

 

[Tigger_Magic]

My problem isn't really that I'm afraid to speak up about things, although I am definitely non-confrontational. It's just that when something like that happens, I'm usually very stunned and can't think of a thing to reply until later!

I completely understand... been in the same situation too many times myself. Sometimes the exceptional rudeness of someone else can throw anyone off-guard. I suppose during the holiday season it's especially unexpected.

 

[Disneyrsh]

You know what drives me nuts? When the Salvation Army guy shouts "THANK you" when I walk by him without putting money in his pot. I finally turned around to him (I food shop every monday) and said "I just spent 100 dollars on Salvation Army Angel Tree kids, can you try and save the judgement for Jesus?"

Heh, it so shut him up. And darn it, it's true; every year we do as many angel tree kids as we can. And we do socks for the veterans over at the hospital-nice warm Costco ones, too. And we give to the church, blah blah blah. In other words, we're doing our part in society, and some of these charities are downright uncharitable if they're not the recipient of our hard earned money. It's probably because they don't deserve it, with their tactics!!!

I think what people who donate regularly need is some sort of a pin, along the lines of the breast cancer/support our troops ribbon pins, that say "I donated!"

I don't feel guilty for not donating more, since we do a lot, but I won't stand for being made to feel bad by some ignoramus ringing a bell or calling me on the phone during dinner.

I usually just say, "I've already donated." Yes, I may not have donated to YOU, but I definitely donated.

Sooooo, I wonder how to get a pin made....

 

[Disneyrsh]

The people who stop you in the middle of town/the street/wherever who want you to donate to this charity and that charity... we call them Chuggers in the UK.
Charity Muggers.

that's great! Chuggers!

 

[canwegosoon]

I agree...and the funny thing is I was doing a wreath fundraiser sale for our Cub scout troop at our Church Sat and Sun. Several people that know me (and know I volunteer a lot of time at the school and for scouts came over and said hi)...if they brought a wreath or not, it was ok with me...we all have our own things, but the people who knew me well, and would have otherwise said HI, but this time scurried off, without even a wave or smile, made me feel uncomfortable. I did not ask if anyone wanted to buy a wreath, they knew they were for sale, and they knew the money was going to scouts...end of story.

Now back to OP and donating at all the little " hawkers" , I used to feel guilty too..but, when 9/11 happened and they money was going other places.. that was strike one, when I found out Salvation Army was paying bellringers(not all but a good % in our area) that was strike 2, and when I see Holiday collectors out before Halloween(SA in mid October)..that is strike 3.

Like many people have said, I have specific charties I have donated to this year, plus my voulnteer time, plus food pantries, etc. I am only able to do so much. I also turn down supermarket and fast food requests...I usually say, Not today thanks.

My mother ran a SA for years, and when we were having money problems(serious ones) she said, if I ever needed clothes I could ask for them at any SA, but she never mentioned anything like bedding. Speaking of... I have to go organise my donations for the SA...

 

[Disneyrsh]

I didn't know there was a problem with that. Early in our marriage, we'd bought a mattress that we were convinced was used with a new cover on it. Within just a week it was saggy and lumpy like an old mattress.

Off Topic, sorry, but I love www.originalmattressfactory.com. They're made right here in Atlanta, and are the best mattresses EVER! My christmas present to myself last year was the orthopedic king sized pillow top mattress from them.

After 12 years of marriage on 30 year old grandma hand me down mattress with my 6'4" husband, this mattress is a dream! I don't fall into the gulley when he lays down , because there is no gulley anymore

Sorry, jsut had to post about how much I love my mattress...

 

[Marseeya]

Off Topic, sorry, but I love www.originalmattressfactory.com. They're made right here in Atlanta, and are the best mattresses EVER! My christmas present to myself last year was the orthopedic king sized pillow top mattress from them.

After 12 years of marriage on 30 year old grandma hand me down mattress with my 6'4" husband, this mattress is a dream! I don't fall into the gulley when he lays down , because there is no gulley anymore

Sorry, jsut had to post about how much I love my mattress...

Hey, I'm glad to hear that! DH and I are looking for a mattress right now and we have a few of those Original Mattress Factory stores in Pittsburgh. I wondered how they were.