"Save the Date" cards?

[minniecarousel]

We received a "Save the Date" card a few months ago for a wedding on Labor Day weekend. We haven't received the actual invitation yet. Shoudn't we have received the invite by now? The wedding is in SoCal and we'd need to fly, so we need to book a room and get airfare. I'm hesitant to do that until I get the actual invitation. Are Save the Date cards in lieu of invitations nowadays?

 

[shortbun]

'Save the date' is so people can make plans ahead of time. Actual invitations are just a formality and carry the rsvp card. I would have made plans by now. If you're uncomfortable, call someone. You might be too late since it's a holiday weekend.

 

[luvmy3]

Isn't the time frame around 6 weeks? You should be receiving an invitation within the next few weeks if thats the case.

 

[Bren's Mom]

If there are out of town guests, sending invites 8 weeks before is a good idea.

The Save The Date card *should* be an indication that you will be invited to the wedding, but the way some brides and weddings are these days I personally wouldn't buy plane tickets without having received the invite (or confirming directly with the bride). Because what if they realized their 325 person list was too much on their budget and decided to scale back? I wouldn't chance it.

OP, if you need to get plane tickets I would call the bride to confirm the plans and that you will still be receiving an invite. Or, wait until you get the invite and if it's too late to get a decent rate then you just miss the wedding. How close you are to the couple getting married will likely dictate which you choose.

Dh's cousin is getting married in mid-August. We were told months ago by dh's mom that her SIL (the groom's mom) informed her that we would be invited but that it was adults only. Dh's aunt passed this message along so we could all start looking for sitters since usually MIL or SIL watches our kids and other SILs kids.

Last Sunday at a family picnic I asked how plans for a shower were coming along, and dh's aunt looked at me oddly. You didn't get an invite she said? Um, no. So she asked my SILs, and they hadn't either. She was SHOCKED, since the invites had been out for weeks and she DID put us on the list. I felt bad, because I didn't really care was just making conversation. So the next day all 3 of us got e-mailed shower invites from the bride's sister. It's less than 2 weeks away, and we've all already got plans.

Then yesterday we had the other side of the family over and MIL asked for our wedding invite to show someone. Um, we never got one! LOL So here we go again! I think the bride and groom are in over their heads. Or maybe the right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing. Either way, no big deal but in this case if it was out of state there is NO WAY I would buy plane tickets!

 

[mjkacmom]

We have a wedding that weekend, and received a save the date months ago, and the invitation a couple of weeks ago. Most of the guests are from out of town (which is why DH is going alone - $500+ for air).

 

[ohiomom28]

Supposed to be 8 weeks for OOT guests, as a courtesy. I sent mine out at 7 weeks for all.

 

[bumbershoot]

The *point* of save the date cards is so that people can get their travel arrangements worked out well ahead of the invitations. Invites don't usually get sent until way too soon before the wedding for those traveling. That's why save-the-dates got started.

To wait to make travel arrangements until you get the invite is thwarting the helpfulness of the save the date.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

Invitations can should be sent 6-8 weeks before the event depending on where guest are coming from.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

6 weeks tends to be the "norm" for invites.

We had a save the date and already got the invite for a late october wedding. I thought it was kind of early.

But I also have family that got an invite for a late September wedding just recently and that is after labor day. So--I don't know.

Labor day is a little over 7 weeks away.