SAHM with kids in school, a question for you.

[tiggerlover]

I was a SAHM from the time DS was born until he was three years old, my days were filled spending fun time with DS, cleaning the house, doing laundry, running the errands etc. Then we moved back to america and I went to work for three years. After returning to Italy I am once again geographically unemployed, but my days are not as full as they used to be because DS is in school from 7:30 until 3:30. So my question is for SAHM's who have children in school, none at home.....what do you do with your time?

I do a lot of volunteer work and of course I keep up with the house, laundry and errands. I attend a Bible study class, I am the VP of PTA, I go to the gym to work out a couple times a week and sometime I do things with my girlfriends. But there are some times during the week (usually a day a week) that I really do not have much to do, so I wondered what others like me do to fill their time.

 

[dizneenut]

Well, I'm a SAHM w/ 4 boys, all in school. I ended up babysitting 2 friends kids during the day. I don't know WHAT I was thinking!!

 

[Disney Doll]

DIS!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[SeaSpray]

My DSs are now 15 and 12 and I fill my days with many of the same things that you do, tiggerlover.

I volunteer at DSs' schools once in a while, I do volunteer work including bible studies for and with my congregation, I make all the phone calls that DH would make if he weren't at work, including setting up his doctor appts (he has a few health issues that require many doctor visits), I do the food shopping during the day, banking, shopping, cleaning, and other errands. I have my nails done every 2 weeks, and I just joined a Weight Watchers group that meets on Tuesday mornings. About a month ago I began working for our accountant, once a week, which happens to be today, Wednesday. She lives on Cape Cod, so it's a nice leisurely drive down (I live south of Boston), with coffee and a muffin, and the radio playing in the background. So that takes up one of my days during the week, but I am back home before DSs get home from school.
I also have days once in a while where it seems that I have a lot of free time, but for the most part, my days are filled with a lot of things to do, and I wouldn't trade this for the world. To me, being home when my DSs come home from school is important.

 

[rbuzzotta]

I, too am a SAHM. My days are hectic. 2 of my 3 DD's are in school full time, although they start and end at different times. My youngest goes 3 hours. It chops up my day. I come home from taking her to preschool and get some cleaning done before I have to pick her up. Then it's home for lunch and carpool soon after for the others.

She won't be in full day until grade 1.........so one more year of a choppy schedule then I will have a full school day to myself.....

 

[WendyZ]

I am a SAHM also. My days go so fast I can't believe it. My DD and DS run on two different schedules so my day is shorter than what it used to be. I do the housework, errands, etc. while their in school. Then I'm their taxi cab after school! DD does alot of sports so there is practices and games. I am so glad I get to be there to see her. I do volunteer alot up to DS school and I on the PTO. So my time is very full. I actually enjoy being home, but every now and then I wonder if I should be out working. I don't know why that is.

 

[mtemm]

Can you take a class somewhere? Learn something new? Take up a hobby?

 

[ByTheSea]

Not a SAHM, but DH is a SAHD...

In addition to the cleaning, laundry, shopping etc., he works on a home improvement project. I mean really detailed. He has spent months re-modeling our bathroom, had to learn as he went, new plumbing, re-wiring, new dryway, tiling, etc... the only thing that didn't get replaced is the bathtub but it was re-finished.... the end is near for that project so we are discussing what to focus on next...

 

[bananiem]

I do all the stuff you'd expect like cleaning. laundry, grocery shopping-which is just another way fo going to get more work for myself, etc... I throw in a trip to the public library 3-4 times a month, volunteer a bunch at the kids' school, then it seems to start over with laundry again on Monday. And I DIS each morning for a little bit.
If I have spare time I like to read as a stress-reliever and scrapbook. But I always feel guilty 'cause there's always SOMETHING else I should be doing. Shoot, right now I should be putting a load in the washer and vacuuming.

 

[Jeafl]

In addition to all the housework and laundry, and other chores, I volunteer at my kids' school Monday afternoons and all day Wednesday. On Fridays I volunteer at a nearby women's shelter. Mostly I watch their kids while they work or look for employment. I also do a lot of decorating which can be time consuming. My oldest daughter gets out of school at 2:14, so she is home before 2:30. Believe it or not, sometimes it feels like there are not enough hours in the day to get everything done! I do allow myself an hour or so a day to DIS--I deserve it!

 

[Mishetta]

I must be doing something wrong since I never have a spare moment. The only time I get to go on the computer is when baby is in highchair (almost right next to me) since he can squirm out of his belt. I couldn't tell you what I do all day long but I'm constantly doing something. We have a large home & I do care for baby (DS#2) as well as my ill DM all day (except for when both nap), but for the most part, I am picking up the house. There is always tons to do in my DS's room & always something in the kitchen. Always laundry & ironing to do (YUCK!) I do realize though that my 15 month old is more work then the rest of my family. I can't do anything when he's up....except follow him around the house to keep him safe. I have to constantly pick up all his toys since I can't have my DM tripping over them when she walks around the house. He's really a full time job!

This is all new to me though. I was never a SAHM until it happened to me abruptly in July when my DM was diagnosed with cancer. We spend most of our days running from one doctor's appt to the next & to the Cancer Center, etc...never a dull moment. Scramble to get dinner done, help DS#1 with homework ~ or check it over, clean up after dinner & make lunches for the big guys for the next day. I sit down around 8 or 9pm & get about 30 mins with my DH until he has to get to bed (since he's up at 415am) ~ and again to the computer for some relaxation & communication with other adults!

Whew...I'm tired just reading my post!

 

[disneygals]

Mischetta...so sorry about your DM!

As for not getting enough done...OF COURSE you can't with a 15 month old. It was one of my favorite ages for my kids..they're SO cute, but absolutely exhausting. It was so amazing to me when all my kids reached an age that I could actually leave the room without worrying about them being in physical danger..lol.

Vivienne

 

[sharbear]

I work part-time (20hrs per week) and sometimes I agree that it is lonely being home but think about it this way. Your child will benefit in many ways with you being with him.

I think that some of the problem is that you can't work even part-time because of your situation. Try to learn to enjoy this time. Don't worry about always being busy because someday you are going to miss this. This is a time that I think that you will always look back on because it is such a different experience in your life. Try to do something that you will never be able to do once you get back in the states. Try a new restaurant (try to enlist others) every week. Try a new dish and then try to make it at home. Learn a new language, learn to ski, or take bike ride through the countryside.

I go to lunch once a week with my friends and we have a great time. Someday I won't be able to do these things and right now it is better for me to be home when the kids are home. There will be plenty of days for me to work but not many more to spend time with my kids. Just remember it's not permenant and to enjoy doing things for yourself (or doing nothing at all but enjoying a good book)

 

[disykat]

I admit there are times I get bored. I think many jobs have times with less going on though. (At least that's what I gather from all who DIS at work LOL!) I do all the same things others have mentioned - except the out to lunch! Many of my friends are SAHM's too, but we can't seem to coordinate our schedules. It's easier to meet my working friends!

Volunteer work (which is what I spend the majority of time doing) seems to go in spurts. I get used to running around like a chicken with my head cut off and then all of a sudden the event is over and a little free time seems weird. Once I settle back in though I easily find things to fill my days. I've been planning on painting the inside of the house (pretty much every room) and have yet to start - so I know there is something waiting for me if I get bored.

 

[FINFAN]

My kids are on 2 different schedules as well, actual "alone" time I have each weekday is 5.5 hours. In that time I am the maid, financial planner (aka money juggler), lawn care/snow removal, auto mechanic, I free-lance and volunteer at 2 different schools, pet walker and since $ is tight I have added handy-woman to the list. DH is desperately job seeking so I am also a secretary/recruiter on many days. Then,before and after my whole 5.5 hours is up I become a tutor, cook,taxi cab, place of kids friends to gather, wife and friend. My day begins at 6 a.m. and ends at 11:30p.m. I admit I am not the most organized person, but there is always SOMETHING to fill my day. I have found that even if you are SAHM how to spend your day is never really your own, just on your own. That is where it can become lonely. If you do have the time a agree with the post about taking a class or even finding time to hit the library. I have met some regulars there when checking out "how-to" books.