RSVP for a birthday party

[rt2dz]

This is my biggest pet peeve.

I hate people that don’t put the date, time and/or place on the invitation because any of those three things can affect our decision to attend or not, which means I have to call twice. Wastes my time. And I don’t want people calling me twice, again, wastes my time.

When I put down to RSVP, I actually don’t put RSVP, but let us know if you are coming or not. Gives them a bigger hint. I provide my home phone and email. I used to provide a voice mail number too, but unfortunately, I don’t have that anymore. I miss it desperately. I also have them give me the RSVP two days before I actually need it, so the day after, I call/email people to ask. I do so nicely. I just wanted to make sure you received the invitation… I also try to pick a time when I think I can just leave a message, school pick up, so I don’t have to hear their excuses. Although, a couple of times, they didn’t receive the invite. Turned out their kid had their feelings hurt by it to. They were thrilled I called.

I call because I’ve had people who did not RSVP not show and had people who did not RSVP show up. 50% assume that if they don’t RSVP you know they’re not coming. The other 50% assume that if they don’t RSVP you know they are coming.

 

[megthewonderful]

I would not assume that they aren't coming. I made that assumption with my son's birthday party in March and then the day before I found out that three kids we thought weren't coming, were planning to be there. I had already told my son his friends weren't coming and had completed the goodie bags. Well, the parents called the night before and told me they forget to let us know and just remembered when they looked at their calendars.

 

[MindyLuvsMickey]

Thanks to the OP for posting this. We are having DS 4th birthday party next Saturday and I have 3 of his school friends that have not RSVP'd yet. It is a party at our home, but I am making things like big race cars for the kiddos to wear and custom license plates for each . . . not to mention the goodie bags. I really need to know. The cars alone are taking me 2 hours each (painting, stenciling, adding shoulder straps, wheels, etc) I don't want to make them if the kids aren't even coming!

I think I'll just have to suck it up and call.

Why does it have to be so difficult?

 

[tigger813]

I would call them. I usually email or call people I haven't heard from just to make sure they got the invitation. One of my daughter's friends hadn't gotten the invitation so I was glad that I called to check.
We're having a 40th party for DH on Saturday. I sent out evites. There was only one family that did not RSVP. I don't think they are coming but they have not RSVP'd before and shown up anyways.
Just call or email them so you know. If someone doesn't like that you are checking, then you didn't need them at the party. I just find it rude to not RSVP.
I've heard of people not RSVPing for weddings and then showing up which is even worse!

 

[Aristomommy]

I would call the parents and ask. DD9 has gotten invitations at school and forgot to bring them home when she was younger. I would have never known of the party unless I got he call. I also wouldn't want the host to think we were rude (they still may) for not RSVP'ing. This is a busy time of year with vacations ending and school starting. People may be distracted by many things.