I have another brother (besides Al) that, when I told him our mom was dying of lung cancer & only had about 6 weeks left to live, responded by saying: "Mom's a tough old bird. She'll pull through it." Talk about denial!!! Well, she did die 6 weeks later - almost to the day. Then, he didn't want to come down for her memorial service!
I had some very choice words to say to him and needless to say, he did come down. He's the same brother who went into denial when our father was dying. Al, on the other hand, did what he could from 1500 miles away to help out - even if it was calling every day (before cell phones) and paying exorbitant long distance charges. Because I was the only child living in the area - I had the honors of being the caretaker. It was tough, but I made it. If Al could have helped in that respect, he would have done it in (pardon the expression) a New York minute.
My mom had this saying: "A son is a son til he takes a wife. A daughter's a daughter all of her life." This doesn't apply to Al, but certainly does to our other brother.
Only available for partial sites. 
I am not downgrading. 
(Am I alowed to say that I am happy on this thread 
