Remember me and my private school/public school issues?

[connorlevismom]

Believe it or not, they are STILL going on! I cannot for the life of me decide what to do! Just a re-cap:

We live in a not so great school district and DS will be starting kindergarten next fall. We deicded to go private and after interviewing about 15 schools, we chose one. Then we decided that the school was in a good district so why not try public.

Here is what has happened since then. We decided to scap that area and move closer to some family members. We decided there is a great public school district and we would look for a home there. We put our house on the market and it has been 2 months with no offers. We looked at about 50 homes in this district and are not in love with any of them. So now we are thinking private again. Moving to a different area still but chosing a private school for several reasons.

I feel like I am ripping my hair out! Am I making to much of this decision or am I on the right track by making sure my DS gets the best I can give him? Am I crazy for thinking private again when there is a good school district around? I just feel terrified to make the wrong decision! Has anyone else gone through this?
Kristine

 

[imthatgirl]

out of curiousity, because i dont remember the first post, what exactly is it that makes the public schools in your area bad? are all the ones in your city or town bad? without moving couldnt you send him to another on in the same city or town?

 

[connorlevismom]

out of curiousity, because i dont remember the first post, what exactly is it that makes the public schools in your area bad? are all the ones in your city or town bad? without moving couldnt you send him to another on in the same city or town?

Pretty much. My district is really bad and is having major budget issues. I thought about open enrolling him in the one school in the district I might be OK with and found out they did not offer all day kindergarten. That does not work for me.

Yeah, my district has a reputation in my area as being pretty bad.

Kristine

 

[imthatgirl]

Pretty much. My district is really bad and is having major budget issues. I thought about open enrolling him in the one school in the district I might be OK with and found out they did not offer all day kindergarten. That does not work for me.

Yeah, my district has a reputation in my area as being pretty bad.

Kristine

what im asking is what is so bad? sometimes reputations mean nothing and are unfounded. i assume youve done some looking into the school. what are the test scores? i dont know what they are called there, ours are the MCAS. its public record how each school is doing. also what is the attendance? that shows a lot about how well the school is doing. you can also find this info on line.
funding is an issue everywhere, so i wouldnt base the decision solely on that.

you can send your child to any school in the area, the schools like to make you think you have to send them to a specific school, its not true. you just have to be willing to provide transportation.

you say the other school that you like is only half day kindergarten. what about an after school program. almost every school in the country provides some kind of program or transportation to a care facility. it does cost, but so would private school

my middle child starts K next year. he will go to the same school my daughter currently goes to. they offer full or half day k. the full day costs, im not sure how much. we choose half day. i dont know if you are choosing half because of your work schedule. but i know i looked into the advantages of a full day program vs, a half day program. the only advantage i could find were for kids who didnt have parents around to do things with them. not just parents who work, but who are basically physcologically absent and uninterested in their kids lives. my children dont fit that catagory .

so, i dont know, maybe really look into the schools and the test scores and make a solid informed decision. rememeber paying for school does not gaurantee a better education, many parents find that out the hard way.

but, no you are not making too mauch out of it, as long as you know what it is you are looking for.

 

[connorlevismom]

what im asking is what is so bad? sometimes reputations mean nothing and are unfounded. i assume youve done some looking into the school. what are the test scores? i dont know what they are called there, ours are the MCAS. its public record how each school is doing. also what is the attendance? that shows a lot about how well the school is doing. you can also find this info on line.
funding is an issue everywhere, so i wouldnt base the decision solely on that.

you can send your child to any school in the area, the schools like to make you think you have to send them to a specific school, its not true. you just have to be willing to provide transportation.

you say the other school that you like is only half day kindergarten. what about an after school program. almost every school in the country provides some kind of program or transportation to a care facility. it does cost, but so would private school

my middle child starts K next year. he will go to the same school my daughter currently goes to. they offer full or half day k. the full day costs, im not sure how much. we choose half day. i dont know if you are choosing half because of your work schedule. but i know i looked into the advantages of a full day program vs, a half day program. the only advantage i could find were for kids who didnt have parents around to do things with them. not just parents who work, but who are basically physcologically absent and uninterested in their kids lives. my children dont fit that catagory .

so, i dont know, maybe really look into the schools and the test scores and make a solid informed decision. rememeber paying for school does not gaurantee a better education, many parents find that out the hard way.

but, no you are not making too mauch out of it, as long as you know what it is you are looking for.

I do have to say, I am kind of offended by your comment about parents not being around to do things with them. I work, I work because I want to work. That does not mean I don't want to be around to do things with my child. It means that I am a better mom when I work. But that is a different thread entirely.

I have done a year and 1/2 of research into every school possible in my district and it is a bad district. The test scores are low, there is major discipline issues, it is just a bad district all the way around.

ETA: around here, this is a large difference between 1/2 day and full day kindergarten. They have a bunch of other subjects they cover that 1/2 day cannot.


Kristine

 

[imthatgirl]

I do have to say, I am kind of offended by your comment about parents not being around to do things with them. I work, I work because I want to work. That does not mean I don't want to be around to do things with my child. It means that I am a better mom when I work. But that is a different thread entirely.

I have done a year and 1/2 of research into every school possible in my district and it is a bad district. The test scores are low, there is major discipline issues, it is just a bad district all the way around.

ETA: around here, this is a large difference between 1/2 day and full day kindergarten. They have a bunch of other subjects they cover that 1/2 day cannot.


Kristine

apperantly you didnt actually read wht i wrote, you read what you wanted to read. try reading it again. i would assume as you are asking about schools that your child wouldnt fit into the catagory...so i dont know why you would be offonded

by law the school must prepare all children ,half day or not ,for 1st grade. they do not cover more in a full day program. they just go over the same thing again. they also spend time in recess, lunch, music, art...things we can do at home. all curriculums are approved ny the school board and must cover the same material, full day or half day. like i said..ive done ridiculous amounts of research on the benefits of full day. although even though there are no benefits, there certainly are no disadvantages academically. so i still dont get why you are so defensive. if you want to send your kid to full day, by all means send them, i was just giving you other options.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

dont know if you are choosing half because of your work schedule. but i know i looked into the advantages of a full day program vs, a half day program. the only advantage i could find were for kids who didnt have parents around to do things with them. not just parents who work, but who are basically physcologically absent and uninterested in their kids lives. my children dont fit that catagory .

Im always amazed by the level of rudeness on this forum, maybe some people are way too stressed to be on a public forum.

Your comments come across as mean-spirited. There are many reasons I might chose an all day school - the opportunity to learn spanish, advanced reading, etc.

 

[imthatgirl]

Im always amazed by the level of rudeness on this forum, maybe some people are way too stressed to be on a public forum.

Your comments come across as mean-spirited. There are many reasons I might chose an all day school - the opportunity to learn spanish, advanced reading, etc.

there was nothing mean about it. like i said, the program is the same. some kids just stay longer. i didnt say there were any disadvantages......so why does everyone get so defensive when someone makes a comment? where did i say full day was bad for a child? it just doesnt put a child ahead of a half day student.

 

[connorlevismom]

there was nothing mean about it. like i said, the program is the same. some kids just stay longer. i didnt say there were any disadvantages......so why does everyone get so defensive when someone makes a comment? where did i say full day was bad for a child? it just doesnt put a child ahead of a half day student.

Maybe they are the same where you live, but they are not where I live. The extended day kids have cooking and spanish and classes like that.

 

[connorlevismom]

but i know i looked into the advantages of a full day program vs, a half day program. the only advantage i could find were for kids who didnt have parents around to do things with them. not just parents who work, but who are basically physcologically absent and uninterested in their kids lives. my children dont fit that catagory .

How is this NOT rude? Seriously?

Kristine

 

[imthatgirl]

How is this NOT rude? Seriously?

Kristine

i suppose if you are a pscologically absent parent you would be offended. im sorry if i offended you,like i said, i assumed you were an involved parent as you were asking about schools

 

[bobbiwoz]

I'm a DGM now, but when we were raising our sons, we moved from NJ to PA because of the small private school we found for our oldest DS. Imagine my dismay when we realized that as good as the school was, it just didn't fit for our second DS. They had an all day kindergarden program, and DYoungerS just couldn't stay up the whole day without a nap!

So, whatever you do, you may find yourself changing more than once regarding schools for your DS. DoldestS went to Private and DYoungerS went to Public. They are both engineers and doing fine!

Best wishes! I would actually meet the kindergarten teachers and principal of the proposed schools and then decide that a system/school is right or not!

Bobbi

 

[DISNEYFOS]

We are going to do Private Kindergarten. Our public is a great school system but my reasoning is my daughter is very used to her small community preschool...She is very comfortable there. I know the kindergarten teacher and she's great. There is a small class ratio which I feel is important at the young age for more individualized attn. It is still a half day program. This is really based on what I think would be the best environment for my relatively quiet, not so quick to jump into new things DD.

As for Public vs Private in general. Its my opinion you get more bang for your buck in Private high school rather than a Private elementary....The Private high school will more than likely get you into a better college.. etc etc. (generalizations here people...don't get offended).

If it were me I would just examine each as to how your child would fare maybe make a plan to visit each and get his opinion?

 

[bellebud]

schooling is always a hard decision. I can give you some reasons we like our private school.

It's a catholic school, and while we aren't very religious (I actually have to get my butt to church more often!), the kids getting that value system at a young age really can't hurt. Does it help??? I don't know, but when my kids hear an ambulance siren and say "mom, let's say a prayer that the people that ambulance is for are ok", it warms my heart and I like that they're thinking that way.

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the uniforms. None of the 'I have to shop in this store', 'so and so made fun of me for my jeans', etc, etc. Boys have to have short hair, girls cannot wear makeup (the school is pre-k to 8th), cannot highlight or dye their hair, cannot wear nail polish, cannot wear jewelry except a small religious necklace and 1 small ring per hand if they want. DD and I do her toenails all the time, and her hand nails on the weekends and vacations. DS7 got a mohawk for the summer and he loved it, but just before school started, we shaved it off. The kids don't mind any of this in the slightest.

The discipline and structure they get is really fantastic. Because it's a private school, they don't 'have' to take anyone. If someone causes a lot of trouble, they'll eventually be gone.

some negatives of our private school... they don't get the funding a public school gets, so not nearly as many different classes (meaning, we have no language, because they cannot afford a language teacher). We have computer from pre-k to 8th though, but i'm sure not a "lab" like a big public school might have. We don't have the science lab stations like a public school has. Our cafeteria food is very limited (not a biggie though). We don't have as many after school activities and clubs as a public school might have. We have jv and varsity basketball and soccer. We have a small student band that the band instructor comes in once a week after school to instruct. I just heard we might be doing a drama club, but that's might. We have only afterschool latchkey, not before school latchkey. Socially, the kids don't have that many kids to pick from for friends. There's only 1 class per grade, and each class has about 20 kids. This is something dh and I like and don't like. when dd had social girl issues last year, it was hard. but it can be hard in a public school too i guess. And if you really have a problem with a teacher, that's it for that grade. But the teachers are great here anyway.

DH and I do like that most of the families there are sort of on the same page as far as life in general goes. every teacher gets to know every child in the entire school, since there aren't that many of them. Kids don't get away w/ much there, and it's such a small building, there's no where to 'hide' in the stairwells or whatever, and smoke, kiss your boyfriend, or worse from stories i hear about some schools.

public schools, i think, can usually offer more 'stuff', but i really like our private school and we're very happy there for our family.

oh, and some kids go onto the private local catholic high school, some go to the local publics, and they all do fine from what i hear. So you don't have to feel like "this decision is forever!", whichever way you go.

and please, anyone taking any offense to public schools, please don't.

 

[connorlevismom]

schooling is always a hard decision. I can give you some reasons we like our private school.

It's a catholic school, and while we aren't very religious (I actually have to get my butt to church more often!), the kids getting that value system at a young age really can't hurt. Does it help??? I don't know, but when my kids hear an ambulance siren and say "mom, let's say a prayer that the people that ambulance is for are ok", it warms my heart and I like that they're thinking that way.

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the uniforms. None of the 'I have to shop in this store', 'so and so made fun of me for my jeans', etc, etc. Boys have to have short hair, girls cannot wear makeup (the school is pre-k to 8th), cannot highlight or dye their hair, cannot wear nail polish, cannot wear jewelry except a small religious necklace and 1 small ring per hand if they want. DD and I do her toenails all the time, and her hand nails on the weekends and vacations. DS7 got a mohawk for the summer and he loved it, but just before school started, we shaved it off. The kids don't mind any of this in the slightest.

The discipline and structure they get is really fantastic. Because it's a private school, they don't 'have' to take anyone. If someone causes a lot of trouble, they'll eventually be gone.

some negatives of our private school... they don't get the funding a public school gets, so not nearly as many different classes (meaning, we have no language, because they cannot afford a language teacher). We have computer from pre-k to 8th though, but i'm sure not a "lab" like a big public school might have. We don't have the science lab stations like a public school has. Our cafeteria food is very limited (not a biggie though). We don't have as many after school activities and clubs as a public school might have. We have jv and varsity basketball and soccer. We have a small student band that the band instructor comes in once a week after school to instruct. I just heard we might be doing a drama club, but that's might. We have only afterschool latchkey, not before school latchkey. Socially, the kids don't have that many kids to pick from for friends. There's only 1 class per grade, and each class has about 20 kids. This is something dh and I like and don't like. when dd had social girl issues last year, it was hard. but it can be hard in a public school too i guess. And if you really have a problem with a teacher, that's it for that grade. But the teachers are great here anyway.

DH and I do like that most of the families there are sort of on the same page as far as life in general goes. every teacher gets to know every child in the entire school, since there aren't that many of them. Kids don't get away w/ much there, and it's such a small building, there's no where to 'hide' in the stairwells or whatever, and smoke, kiss your boyfriend, or worse from stories i hear about some schools.

public schools, i think, can usually offer more 'stuff', but i really like our private school and we're very happy there for our family.

oh, and some kids go onto the private local catholic high school, some go to the local publics, and they all do fine from what i hear. So you don't have to feel like "this decision is forever!", whichever way you go.

and please, anyone taking any offense to public schools, please don't.

Thank you so much for you post. You sound a lot lot me and your reasons for liking and not linking private are spot on with mine. I like the discipline factor a lot.

I need to remind myself that I am not going to ruin him forever if I choose the wrong elementary school for him.

Kristine

 

[bigbabyblues]

We chose private school for our DS, and his younger brother will join him next year. Our thoughts/reasons are very similar to Bellebud's. DS has 10 children in his second grade class. Our school does have "languages" starting in 3rd grade. We don't have uniforms, but the dress code is pretty easy to follow. They don't tolerate bullying or cheating, once it is confirmed, the students are disenrolled by the administrator.

Our public schools are ranked (by the dept of ed) among the very lowest in the state. They have 25-30 kids in each class, and that's too many for little ones, in my opinion. If my child can be in a small class, especially in the ealy grades, he gets much more attention and it's better for him.

This is all my opinion/experience, take it for what it's worth. Private school isn't right for everyone, but it woks for us.