Religious marriage but not legal?

[Dr Pepsi]

I see you are in Texas. Do your friends live in Texas too? If so, they want to be careful because Texas is one of the few US states that still recognizes common law marriage. They should talk to an attorney before they do anything.

And yes, they can be religiously but not legally married (assuming the common law thing isn't an issue) as long as they can find a minister who's willing to perform a religious-only ceremony.

 

[mickeyfan2]

If the couple did not get the marriage license then they are not married in the legal sense.

 

[sanctus]

oh, and btw-as far as u.s governmental benefits go- a person that marries another is not legaly obligated to support them or their children (so no issue for an adult or a child re. public assistance), and, social security regulations were revised some time ago to eliminate the provision wherein a person (most often a woman) is disadvantaged regarding survivor benefits if they choose to re-marry (current regulations look to the duration of a former marriage vs a current-so a re-married can receive a higher benefit if they meet the period of matrimony requirements wherein a former marriage affiliation entitles them to more).

Just a heads up....this is not necessarily true. For food stamps and medicaid, a spouse's income IS countable if they are living together and married. I've also seen people lose SSI benefits due to a spouse's income. SSDI is based on your past earnings, so that would not be impacted.

Just do some research on this stuff first if it's an issue.

 

[Frantasmic]

If a couple is truly committed to having a real marriage, the same committment should also apply in wanting to follow the rules of the country. Does that make sense? Wanting to have a true "religious" marriage should come under the same tenets of wanting to obey the laws God has placed over them via the country as Paul indicates in so many of his letters.

 

[janette]

If a couple is truly committed to having a real marriage, the same committment should also apply in wanting to follow the rules of the country. Does that make sense? Wanting to have a true "religious" marriage should come under the same tenets of wanting to obey the laws God has placed over them via the country as Paul indicates in so many of his letters.

I know of no law that requires you to marry to cohabit.

 

[JPN4265]

Is this possible?

Say you were deeply religious so living together is out of the question but because of legal / financial reasons it is complicated to be married.

If you have a wedding in a church would you have get a marriage certificate?

This is an older couple so no issues with children etc; no one is planning to change names and they plan to keep finances separate.

Just wondering if anyone has heard of or done anything like this.

I always thought that the religious ceremony, was just that, a ceremony. The legal end of it came from the county clerks office where to get the certificate. A judge can make it legal.

 

[froglady]

I see you are in Texas. Do your friends live in Texas too? If so, they want to be careful because Texas is one of the few US states that still recognizes common law marriage. They should talk to an attorney before they do anything.

And yes, they can be religiously but not legally married (assuming the common law thing isn't an issue) as long as they can find a minister who's willing to perform a religious-only ceremony.

It sounds as if in some states, having the appearance of being married (which would be true if a religious ceremony was performed) would make you legally married (eventually) so if they want to avoid being legally married, they can't do it.

I grew up in RI, and have encountered several people in long term "cohabitations" who have made it very clear that they are NOT married. My SIL's mother lived with her fiance for over 30 years. (No children involved)

 

[Keli]

If a couple is truly committed to having a real marriage, the same committment should also apply in wanting to follow the rules of the country. Does that make sense? Wanting to have a true "religious" marriage should come under the same tenets of wanting to obey the laws God has placed over them via the country as Paul indicates in so many of his letters.

I know of no law that requires you to marry to cohabit.

I believe what Frantasmic is saying is that to be truly married, in a religious setting, you also have to follow the laws of the country you live in because Paul tells us to obey the law. The law in US says that you must have a marriage license to be married (in most states).
I don't think Frantasmic was trying to say that the law requires you to marry to cohabit.

 

[NotUrsula]

A good friend of mine is not married because her (male) partner is severely disabled. He would lose his health benefits if they were legally married, and she could not add him to her own health benefits because no private insurer would touch him.

This quandary can sometimes be very hard on disabled older folks who are deeply religious. They don't want to "live in sin", but they literally could not survive without their disability benefits, so they cannot afford to marry a fellow retiree and lose them.

I've heard of ministers doing "blessing" services for older people in this situation. Not officially a marriage, but something that makes them feel that God has recognized their intent.

 

[JennyMominRI]

Personally I don't see how it is possible to be married in the eyes of God but not in the eyes of the gov't.
Either you are married or you are not.
I don't think too many mainstream churches would hold a 'committment ceremony" for a couple.

Many Jewish institutions hold them for gay couples

 

[Laura]

I've known of a couple situations where a couple was married in a religious/spiritual ceremony but without a marriage license. One was a Muslim couple and the other couple was married by a Native American shaman.

 

[missypie]

A good friend of mine is not married because her (male) partner is severely disabled. He would lose his health benefits if they were legally married, and she could not add him to her own health benefits because no private insurer would touch him.

This quandary can sometimes be very hard on disabled older folks who are deeply religious. They don't want to "live in sin", but they literally could not survive without their disability benefits, so they cannot afford to marry a fellow retiree and lose them.

I've heard of ministers doing "blessing" services for older people in this situation. Not officially a marriage, but something that makes them feel that God has recognized their intent.

I think that some older folks will also lose retirement or other benefits if they remarry. There was this older (over 75 year old) unmarried couple in our church choir. I got a kick out of it because of course they shared a room on church choir tours. There is no way that a younger unmarried couple would have been allowed to do that!!!