Rehearsal Dinner & Dining Plan question/advice

[mermaidbride1108]

So since Free Dining came out, all lot of my Bridal party booked a Free Dining Plan.

Bride's Parents
MOH (Sister & her 2 kids, RB & JMB)
Best Man ( Groom's Brother, his wife, & 2 FG's)

We are planing our Rehearsal Dinner at Ohana's. What do you guys think about using one of our Guests Free Dining table service credits for the Rehearsal Dinner?

Hear me out before you all call the etiquette police, lol.

First, they most likely aren't going to use the Dining Plan Table service credit the day of the wedding and probably not the day of the Rehearsal Dinner either.

Second, if we can use their Free DP credits, we then have money to pay for an alcoholic drink or two (we aren't trying to make this a rowdy party, but most of our families enjoy a nice drink with a nice meal, and Ohana has some really cool signature drinks) So even if we aren't paying for their meal, we will be paying for at least 1 Cocktail Drink

Third, we are going to try for a Breakfast at CRT with our families the day after the wedding (FMIL has requested this and she putting up the money for everyone who doesn't have DP, which isn't alot of people). It's our Nephew's first Birthday and she wants to order a small cake for him. We would like to get the White Chocolate Slipper Dessert as a Thank you to everyone for everything for the Wedding. We would pay for the slippers.

Now here's my reasoning, It's our family members, we're asking not wedding guests, their getting their Dining Plan Free, we'll have extra cash for other things, we are already getting them really nice Bridal Party gifts (so far I have a ton of stuff for BM's, plus I'm getting Disney Gift cards for them.)

What do you guys think, do I look like a unclassy cheapskate to mention this to our immediate families, or do you think it's reasonable to do this?

Please give me your honest opinions - best sides of the spectrum

 

[GoodFairies]

Meal plan entitlements cannot be shared with guests not on the dining plan/package. So they will not be able to use their credits to "pay" for you.

 

[mermaidbride1108]

I'm sorry Goodfairies, but I think you missed my explanation. They aren't paying for me - I would pay for myself and everyone on the dining plan.

They would be using their table service credit for their Dinner at Ohana

So basically the meal would be half DP & half cash

 

[GoodFairies]

What do you guys think about using one of our Guests Free Dining table service credits for the Rehearsal Dinner?

Hear me out before you all call the etiquette police, lol. First, they most likely aren't going to use the Dining Plan Table service credit the day of the wedding and probably not the day of the Rehearsal Dinner either.

Second, if we can use their Free DP credits, we then have money to pay for an alcoholic drink or two (we aren't trying to make this a rowdy party, but most of our families enjoy a nice drink with a nice meal, and Ohana has some really cool signature drinks) So even if we aren't paying for their meal, we will be paying for at least 1 Cocktail Drink

Third, we are going to try for a Breakfast at CRT with our families the day after the wedding (FMIL has requested this and she putting up the money for everyone who doesn't have DP, which isn't alot of people). It's our Nephew's first Birthday and she wants to order a small cake for him. We would like to get the White Chocolate Slipper Dessert as a Thank you to everyone for everything for the Wedding. We would pay for the slippers.

Now here's my reasoning, It's our family members, we're asking not wedding guests, their getting their Dining Plan Free, we'll have extra cash for other things, we are already getting them really nice Bridal Party gifts (so far I have a ton of stuff for BM's, plus I'm getting Disney Gift cards for them.)

What do you guys think, do I look like a unclassy cheapskate to mention this to our immediate families, or do you think it's reasonable to do this?

Please give me your honest opinions - best sides of the spectrum

Sorry, I highlighted the parts that come across as confusing.

I would think it would depend on requirements you have to meet for the rehearsal dinner, if any, of which I have no idea.

I will say though that if you expect them to have 2 credits left pp that is required for CRT, you should be the one to take up the burden to make that happen.

 

[29apr00]

I don't think it's a good idea. You would have to explain clearly to the guests before hand that they would be required to have a TS credit available for dinner at Ohana. what would you do if someone messes something up and does not have a credit available? What about the people who aren't on the dining plan? It doesn't matter that those on the DP didn't pay for it, it is still part of the package they booked and are possibly saving those credits for something else. If you are hosting a Rehearsal dinner, than IMO it is your responsibility to pay for it, not ask your quests to use their Dining Plan credits towards it.

 

[mermaidbride1108]

Sorry about that - We as in my & Df using THEIR dining plan credits to plan for THEIR Dinner. Meaning subtracting from the bill x number of dinners and calculating x number of DP credits and then we would of course pay for Gratuity and drinks and if there is anything extra as it's the rehearsal Dinner and we should host it.

For CRT, It's not actually as post bridal breakfast, meaning we aren't hosting it and we didn't ask anyone to go, DF's mom did. She asked everyone to go and bascially asked me to call & book it for her because she has no idea how to call at 7am exactly 90 days before hand, lol.

It's started as a 'going out as a family for Nephew bday' and then my MIL suggested that my family come to. Not invited but said why don't you join us kinda thing - my family is comingbecause they got Free Dining and want to use it up. They weren't coming before they got Free Dining. Basically it's almost free and they don't have to stress over booking it, lol

We would like to surprise everyone with chocolate slippers at the breakfast - and we would pre-pay for these. Just as something special for everyone.

Hopefully I'm clear now - should we talk to our families about DP credits for Rehearsal dinner? Or should we just suck it up and pay for everything? Thoughts???

 

[mermaidbride1108]

I don't think it's a good idea. You would have to explain clearly to the guests before hand that they would be required to have a TS credit available for dinner at Ohana. what would you do if someone messes something up and does not have a credit available? What about the people who aren't on the dining plan? It doesn't matter that those on the DP didn't pay for it, it is still part of the package they booked and are possibly saving those credits for something else. If you are hosting a Rehearsal dinner, than IMO it is your responsibility to pay for it, not ask your quests to use their Dining Plan credits towards it.

Honest opinion and this is what I'm looking for, Thanks for offering it up. This is the reason I'm on the fence about it.... It would just be really nice to be able to offer extras for the rehearsal instead of the basics, but it does come with a hassle about it...

 

[Skylarr29]

For our rehearsal dinner we paid for everyone's meals (appetizers, entrees, and desserts) and non alcoholic drinks. We told the servers ahead of time that a bill would go to each table for the alcoholic drinks consumed and we also discreetly mentioned it to our guests. This could be a nice option for you as well, we had no problem paying for drinks but we had an early morning wedding and wanted to discourage everyone from having too much fun the night before. We had a full open bar the next day at the wedding so we didn't feel too bad.

I agree that you are the host and should therefor pay for the meal. If you think it is out of your budget then maybe have a rehearsal breakfast or find a lower cost alternative.

GL!

 

[mermaidbride1108]

For our rehearsal dinner we paid for everyone's meals (appetizers, entrees, and desserts) and non alcoholic drinks. We told the servers ahead of time that a bill would go to each table for the alcoholic drinks consumed and we also discreetly mentioned it to our guests. This could be a nice option for you as well, we had no problem paying for drinks but we had an early morning wedding and wanted to discourage everyone from having too much fun the night before. We had a full open bar the next day at the wedding so we didn't feel too bad.

I agree that you are the host and should therefor pay for the meal. If you think it is out of your budget then maybe have a rehearsal breakfast or find a lower cost alternative.

GL!

Thanks for your input. We have the budget for a dinner at Ohana's but I just feel that people are going to be wasting Free DP credits and would rather but cash towards something else for our guests... Perfect situation would be if we can pre-pay for 1 or 2 drinks per person... Not sure how I could work that out though.

 

[Skylarr29]

Thanks for your input. We have the budget for a dinner at Ohana's but I just feel that people are going to be wasting Free DP credits and would rather but cash towards something else for our guests... Perfect situation would be if we can pre-pay for 1 or 2 drinks per person... Not sure how I could work that out though.

I don't think you can pre pay for drinks but perhaps you can print your own menu and say something on there about the first 2 are on you? I think every family is different and if you know yours and you think they would be fine using a credit for their dinner I don't think it would hurt. Maybe you can bring it up in a joking manner and see what they say, then you can gauge their reactions without directly asking?

 

[rebeccaroxane]

I understand where you're coming from with not wanting to waste the credits and use it wisely. However, it sounds like it would be alot of effort to explain to your guests the situation, etc and you might come off as sounding frugal??? But you know your guests the best so do what you feel is appropriate. I like what someone suggested with the idea of throwing the comment out there to test the water. Good luck.

 

[NloveW/Disney]

I think it more has to do with what type of family you have. What would they think of you doing this? I have the type of family that would be perfectly fine with this, and would think it was stupid for me to pay for their meal when they could get it for free. Now if it was for the entire wedding guest list( meaning outside your family), then I wouldn't do it, but it sounds like it's just your family. That makes a big difference. And you are still getting them something for being in the wedding, and like you mentioned the drinks and dessert the next day. I see nothing wrong with it, but like I said, it depends on the family you have. Hope that helps!

 

[Bride-to-be]

My feelings are this - if its immediate family - who cares!

Have your mom spread the word! I mean its free in teh first place so its not like you are asking them to pay. Additionally you are right that they probably will have extra meal stuff left over anyway so why not use it.

The only thing I can think that would change that is if someone wanted to dine in a restaurant like the brown derby that requires two meal tickets..

So with all of that said - if you were planning to do that for your all of your wedding guests then I would say probably no - because its might make you guys look a litte - well not traditional I guess is the nicest way to put it. However since its just family - why not?!

 

[daisygirl902]

Wow this thread made me realize how un-traditional we are as a family. 14 family members are all coming for our Escape Wedding - all planning on being on the DDP, and we are planning to eat at Ohana's the night of our Wedding and the guests will be using a TS credit for the meal. I don't think that's a bad thing at all, and neither do my family members...but we are pretty untraditional! Really though - we all have the TS credit....and it saves us money that we can spend elsewhere. Not one has complained about this - they are just happy we are dishing out for the fireworks cruise after dinner