Reality check -- problems with neighbors -- update2 post #60

[Tink-aholic]

One of my coworkers is always telling me: don't let negative thoughts (or people) rent space in your head.

Keep your head up and don't shed another tear. Maybe you could go to your clergyperson for advice? I can't imagine that anyone would actually side with the Unreasonables. They might make them see reason and smooth things over. You do have to live next to them, after all.

Good luck.

 

[Disney845]

We put up what I refer to as "The Barn" in our back yard. It is one of those Tuff Sheds that they sell at Home Depot and they come and build it on your property for you. It is HUGE, I think 12'X16'. I am not sure how tall it is at the peak, but DBF had to have the loft feature added (cha-ching ), so it is a good height.

We also do not have a HOA, but we have to get building permits with the city, have an inspector come out, etc. None of our neighbors have ever complained, of course we have some good neighbors (most are either elderly and DBF does so many odd jobs to help them that they love us, or the house sits empty for half of the year because they are snow birds). I think I am the only one who didn't want the "eye-sore" in my own backyard, but SO really wanted a work shop/storage unit...and we are remodeling the garage into a craft room for me, so it was suposed to be a trade!

But if any neighbors were to have complained...I certainly wouldn't care. It would be my property to do with as I pleased. I agree with the other poster who suggested that you write down the information pertaining to the threat in case anything ever does come of it.

 

[aspcamhreditor2]

, and had motion detector lights installed at the rear of my property in case they decided to retaliate.

Someone also suggested that you take photos of everything as well.

BOTH are great pieces of advice. Hope you follow them!

Most important ... although it's hard ... try to follow the advice many have given here to try to let it roll off your back.

 

[dis-happy]

Well, I'd be super tempted to paint a big smiley face on your new shed...facing their bedroom window of course. Or maybe a scripture verse..."love thy neighbor". And plant a couple of drippy trees.

Guess I'm not a very nice person. Hugs!!!

 

[lunalibre]

Folks have asked to see pictures. I took some today, but I'm not sure how to post them. Can anyone help? I see the little "insert image" icon on the "compose a reply" page, but then it prompts me for a URL. My pictures are local, not on the net, so they don't have a URL. When I try to insert an image using the pathname to the picture file on the local computer, the pictures don't show up in the preview post. What am I doing wrong?

 

[SelfEmployedDebtFree]

Just do what this guy did.

http://cbs2.com/watercooler/Water.Cooler.Stan.2.271539.html

 

[lunalibre]

Thanks for the tips on posting pictures. Here they are. Sorry they're so big. I'll find some cropping software for next time.

I'll start with The Eyesore (aka shed):

You can see the neighbor's basketball goal over the fence. The other neighbor's Suburban isn't parked in the driveway, but trust me, you'd be able to see it if it were there. I realize the port-a-potty really "makes" the scene. At least it's temporary!

Here are two pictures of our new room:

For perspective on the new height of our roof, the old roof went up about midway through the one window in the new room. We really didn't add much height to that part of the house.

Thanks again to everyone for all your support. I swear, we honestly didn't think our storage shed would "ruin the view" from their house and their pool. I'm really not sure what "view" they had before. Our van parked in the driveway? The Suburban?

So, let me know -- is this all going to be totally ugly when it's all done like the U's keep telling me? Did we just ruin our house as well as our relationship with the U's?

 

[Disneychix]

Your neighbors are absolutley ridiculous and I would be happy if I were them because you created a lot more privacy in their yard for them. From the looks of those pictures what really was their view of?

Your addition looks beautiful and that shed isn't hurting anything! I would NOT pay anymore money for plants if it's only for thier benefit. I might even consider keeping the port-o-potty around for good!

It seems like your neighbor may be jealous of your new additions. This is the way they are responding to the fact that your house is now 'nicer' than theirs. Don't baby the babies!

 

[aribelle]

Well, once the porta potty and the spare wood pieces were gone I'd say it looks like lots of houses in my neighborhood. And since the height difference in the fences is so very obvious, perhaps THEY ruined the neighborhood by being too cheap to pay for 2 more feet of fence like everyone else......THAT looks less "conformity" to me, because the fences in the neighborhood have more to do with the asthetics than the yard contents. In our neighborhood everyone has masonry/brick/whatever they're called fences, except one guy who torn that down and put in a redwood fence, which like your neighbor is now the ugly brown fence. Only one in the neighborhood and definitely ruins the continuity of the other fence. But hey.....he had the proper city permits and he does keep it maintained (it started leaning once and he fixed it).

If you had the proper permits than I'd say your neighbor's complaint should be with the city. Our city has a "beautification" department that has to sign off on any permits that are outside.....maybe for just such a reason?

Anyway.....if you want to plant vegetation then just make sure that you first ask the city for their written policy about trees or whatever that hang over your fence.....in other words, make sure that whatever you do is completely approved by the govening authority.

We have a tree that was planted long before we lived here....and planted the certain footage away from the fence....but it's grown above the roofline and of course leaves and stuff fall from it into other yards. The neighbor with the pool complained about it to the previous owners (they were friends so we got lucky and knew a lot about our house/neighborhood before buying). It got to the point where the neighbor had an attorney write a letter to our friends claiming if they didn't pay for the monthly cleanup or remove the tree they'd be sued. They talked with their own attorney, who talked to the city, measurements were taken to be sure the tree was X from the fenceline and the city gave our friends an opinion letter that the tree conformed to all applicable laws. Neighbors shut up, lol. I have the letter "just in case" now, but nothing has ever been said, and this neighbor isn't well liked in the neighborhood anyway, lol.

So....talk to your city departments, be sure that you are following the laws to a T. Maybe ask the city for copies of the pertinent code to provide next time you get a foul mouthed tirade.

Me, I'd probably be more upset about the abusive words......and I'd also let them know that I don't take kindly to threats and neither does the law.

Good luck to you. It's not an envious position but you do appear to be in the right.

 

[LisaNJ25]

honestly..I would of told them to bleep off and if they want any say with what I do on my property than they can pay my mortgage every month.

I looked at the pics and I dont see anything wrong with them

I would keep track of the dates and any threats they make incase you wake up one day with a hole in the shed.

 

[tlbwriter]

That little shed is supposed to be an eyesore? Puhleeze.

 

[Scurvy]

I agree with everyone else that your neighbor is being unreasonable. From the pictures, your additions are not in any way going to be an eyesore. In fact, I would think they would actually increase your property value, which is always a good thing.

I also agree that you need to take pictures of everything for your records and get motion-sensing lights for the area. Also, be sure to keep copies of any paperwork (reciepts for the work and supplies, permits, etc.) Most importantly: document, document, document! They have essentially warned you that they intend to escalate this. They could attempt to damage your property or cause other problems for you. You need to keep a clear record of any interactions with them about this. Start now, while it's fresh in your mind, and write down everything they've said and done so far. Add to the record each time they say or do anything else. Hopefully they are just being irrational right now and will get over it. In case they don't, though, you need to make sure you don't forget anything. If the time ever comes that you need to take legal action against them it will help if you have accurate records of any incidents.

 

[Anonomom]

While I think your neighbors' way of approaching the problem was 100% wrong, I can't say as I'd be thrilled to see your shed every time I wanted to use my pool. It's pretty ugly, and it looks like it's right on the property line. I can see why they're annoyed. I'm guessing that they're even more annoyed that they didn't have any warning of what you were going to do.

I know they have no say in what you do and that you're in compliance with the law. I'm not saying you really did anything wrong. But checking in before you built the shed would have been the right thing to do, as a matter of courtesy. At the very least, you could have tried to work out a reasonable compromise. We've checked with our neighbors any time we've done anything (even planting trees) near our property line. I know our neighbors would do the same (and, in fact, they have in the past).

 

[LisaNJ25]

While I think your neighbors' way of approaching the problem was 100% wrong, I can't say as I'd be thrilled to see your shed every time I wanted to use my pool. It's pretty ugly, and it looks like it's right on the property line. I can see why they're annoyed. I'm guessing that they're even more annoyed that they didn't have any warning of what you were going to do.

I know they have no say in what you do and that you're in compliance with the law. I'm not saying you really did anything wrong. But checking in before you built the shed would have been the right thing to do, as a matter of courtesy. At the very least, you could have tried to work out a reasonable compromise. We've checked with our neighbors any time we've done anything (even planting trees) near our property line. I know our neighbors would do the same (and, in fact, they have in the past).

Do you think the neighbor would of/did check with the neighbors before the put up the pool? A pool in itself can be annoying to neighbor with all of the noise.

Its not like she put up this huge garage. When you live this close to your neighbors things will change overtime in their yards.

What would they have done with more warning..sat there nd stared over at the other neighbors suburban?

Op..you need to buy something like this and put it up on the backside of your shed

 

[RMulieri]

While I think your neighbors' way of approaching the problem was 100% wrong, I can't say as I'd be thrilled to see your shed every time I wanted to use my pool. It's pretty ugly, and it looks like it's right on the property line. I can see why they're annoyed. I'm guessing that they're even more annoyed that they didn't have any warning of what you were going to do.

I know they have no say in what you do and that you're in compliance with the law. I'm not saying you really did anything wrong. But checking in before you built the shed would have been the right thing to do, as a matter of courtesy. At the very least, you could have tried to work out a reasonable compromise. We've checked with our neighbors any time we've done anything (even planting trees) near our property line. I know our neighbors would do the same (and, in fact, they have in the past).

In certain states and townships you can place things on the property line( Not that it is recommended)As long as she is on her property, in compliance with all regulations, she can build whatever she wants.If you are close with your neighbors than by all means inform them of the decision,ask advice.But no one needs to ask Permission (nice but not necessary) about something in their yard, especially since the neighbors 1) aren't paying for it or 2)don't pay the mortgage.Whenn I put my pool in, we informed the neighbors on all sides .We sited it so it would not inconvenience anybody.The one set of neighbors still were not happy, and were trying anything they could to discourage a pool.They also did the same thing when we put up our fence.My point is that some neighbors will complain and argue no matter what, and no matter how much you may include them on homeowner decisions.Even though they were unhappy, there is absolutely no excuse for foul language or crass behavior because they are displeased either.Count yourself lucky you have good neighbors.

 

[Anonomom]

I didn't say that the OP shouldn't have built on the property line, just that I can understand why the neighbors are annoyed. I also said that the way the neighbors addressed the issue was 100% wrong.

There's a huge difference between what people can do and what they should do. The OP was totally within her rights to build like she did, but it seems silly for her to be in tears now about the result. She chose not to ask anyone's opinions before proceeding, and now she's dealing with unpleasant consequences.

If she had asked the neighbors before hand and had gotten the response she describes, I'd be right in agreement with the rest of you and would have recommended that she proceed regardless of the neighbors' reaction. But since she never thought to ask ahead of time, she'll never know if they would have been more reasonable beforehand or if a good compromise was possible. The damage is done now, and both families have to deal with it.

 

[aspcamhreditor2]

Wow ....

THAT addition and "outbuilding" are what is causing the problem? Sorry, I was expecting an "eyesore". That little building is practically a nothing ... and most of it is HIDDEN by THEIR fence.

Again ... recommend you take pics, document, get motion sensor lights.

I never cease t be amazed that today's society gets worked up over stuff like this. People are way to self-centered and self-absorbed. Sorry you are stressing over this.

 

[RN01]

I would put a 8ft high wooden fence up around your yard ( do they make them that tall?) That way you don't have to look at them and they don't have to look at you!

 

[LisaInNc]

Bless your heart!

My gosh it's your property and you did everything right. You did not have to ask them anything . I am sorry they didn't like it but if they can't play nice with their neighbors maybe they need to move waaaaaaayyyyyyyy out into the boonies so so one there can ruin their property values.

How awful that you have to deal with someone like that!

 

[disneydreamgirl]

Sounds like they're trying to bully you into feeling bad about this and I don't think you should. Sometimes you just have to say to a neighbour, "I'm sorry you feel that way." If that doesn't close the subject, you may have to say "I've listened to your concerns however there is nothing that's going to change at this point in time. I'm sure given some time, you will get used to it."
Good Luck with this - these situations can be tough, but hopefully it passes sooner than later!