Real ID: Married Women Beware!

OhhBother

DIS Veteran
Joined
Sep 20, 2000
How were you able to do it online? Did you upload the necessary documents?
I didn't have to upload anything. It said the DMV has everything it needs about me on file and that I was eligible to get my REAL ID online. Super easy!

And, just for the record, I am female and married. I changed to my husband's last name when we got married in 1995.
 

fly girl

DIS Veteran
Joined
Jan 20, 2012
I haven't got mine yet. I am hoping it won't be a headache.

I think a lot of hassle depends on your state.

I know Ohio has had a lot of issues because they won't take the traditional Marriage Certificates most of us have. (You know the one you got at the church). You have to get an official one from the state you were married in. And if you got married out of state (like I did) you have to jump through more hoops with a certified, notarized license.

https://www.wcpo.com/money/consumer/dont-waste-your-money/married-women-call-new-ohio-bmv-rules-unfair
 
  • Joined
    Oct 23, 2015
    I haven't got mine yet. I am hoping it won't be a headache.

    I think a lot of hassle depends on your state.

    I know Ohio has had a lot of issues because they won't take the traditional Marriage Certificates most of us have. (You know the one you got at the church). You have to get an official one from the state you were married in. And if you got married out of state (like I did) you have to jump through more hoops with a certified, notarized license.

    https://www.wcpo.com/money/consumer/dont-waste-your-money/married-women-call-new-ohio-bmv-rules-unfair
    I totally don't get that some states are way more of a hassle than others.

    On the other hand I also got married out of state and even though it was the neighboring state in my same metro it would have been easy to get a certified copy of my marriage certificate that was filed through the county if I didn't want to drive the 45mins to the courthouse to get it. I think that more goes back to the process of a specific state for issuing certificates in general. At least that's my opinion.

    FWIW when we sent in the marriage certificate we requested a certified copy of the marriage certificate which was mailed to us. That's the copy we used to change my name. Then over 5 years later we drove to the courthouse (which again we could have sent off easily to have it mailed) to get another one for getting my passport in my married name.

    That may also be because of how marriage certificates were done back in the day. IDK honestly on that. Maybe the issue is people didn't used to file through the counties as much...is that the problem?

    But I also think we have to remember the point of the documentation is prove you are who you are. I can show you the photocopy of my marriage certificate all day long. At the end of the day though it's just a photocopy and not a certified one.
     

    tzolkin

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Jan 3, 2008
    Luck has absolutely nothing to do with it. Keep your records current across the board
    and you will be fine.
    I understand that it seems like common sense to have your records be exact and consistent, but I just don’t think that was seen as very important in the past. It’s easy enough to know you should keep everything consistent and be sure to do so moving forward, but it’s more difficult to fix things that are already done.

    I can definitely see where this could be a hassle for some women. Just like in the OP’s example, I know that my mom’s name is different on various documents. I’m not entirely sure if that was by her choice or just how someone else decided to record them. She’s First Middle Last, First Maiden Last, just First Last, and various combinations of middle initials. If everything has to match exactly, I’m sure she’s going to have an issue.

    My grandmother has an even more complicated name history because her birth certificate had her name as “Female”. Over her many years she was able to get drivers licenses and even passports with different names on them, but now agencies are more strict about what documentation they accept. She already was not able to get a new passport because she couldn’t obtain some of her records. Now if she can’t use her existing ID (and doesn’t have the documentation to get a Real ID) she will no longer be able to fly even within the US.
     

    disneychrista

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Dec 26, 2002
    I didn't have to upload anything. It said the DMV has everything it needs about me on file and that I was eligible to get my REAL ID online. Super easy!
    Interesting...in California I had to provide two documents showing my address to prove resedency which the DMV wouldn't have had. My other documents were provided 30+ years ago when I got my license originally. In fact my certified birth certificate I only had because of getting my drivers license. when I was 16.
     

    bcla

    On our rugged Eastern foothills.....
    Joined
    Nov 28, 2012
    My wife won't have any issues since she never changed her name for any official purposes. I'm pretty sure this is common these days.

    However, if you really don't want to go through the hoops for a Real ID driver license or state ID, a passport card is perfectly acceptable for all the Real ID purposes. It's $30 if you've already got a passport, and valid for 10 years. I know some people think it's just kind of a pseudo passport, but my original reason for getting one was to have proof of citizenship along with all the talk that California might not keep on getting Real ID waivers and may not be compliant.
     
  • fly girl

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Jan 20, 2012
    I totally don't get that some states are way more of a hassle than others.

    On the other hand I also got married out of state and even though it was the neighboring state in my same metro it would have been easy to get a certified copy of my marriage certificate that was filed through the county if I didn't want to drive the 45mins to the courthouse to get it. I think that more goes back to the process of a specific state for issuing certificates in general. At least that's my opinion.

    FWIW when we sent in the marriage certificate we requested a certified copy of the marriage certificate which was mailed to us. That's the copy we used to change my name. Then over 5 years later we drove to the courthouse (which again we could have sent off easily to have it mailed) to get another one for getting my passport in my married name.

    That may also be because of how marriage certificates were done back in the day. IDK honestly on that. Maybe the issue is people didn't used to file through the counties as much...is that the problem?

    But I also think we have to remember the point of the documentation is prove you are who you are. I can show you the photocopy of my marriage certificate all day long. At the end of the day though it's just a photocopy and not a certified one.
    You'd think it would be the same in all 50 states :confused3 but then again it is our government ... they tend to do things insanely stupid at times.:upsidedow

    I don't think I have the states official Marriage Certificate. I was married in PA. And I do recall how "lovely" they are to deal with. That's going to be a load of fun.

    I just think if you have your birth certificate, SS, Passport, state DL, and proof of residency you should be good. I mean, you needed the proof to change your SS and Passport. They can find your trail. It isn't that hard. Even when I have white paged myself online I can see my maiden name in there. If white pages can find me, you'd think it wouldn't be that difficult.
     

    skittles67

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Jan 14, 2017
    I had to take in my birth certificate, marraige license and social security card. They used my current license, and the BMV renewal letter they mailed me as proof of my current address.
     

    disneychrista

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Dec 26, 2002
    Nobody I know has had an issue.
    The biggest issue I had when I got mine, was that it was also a renewal and their records showed I had to take the written exam too. My renewal letter didn't state that but I didn't have it with me, so I either could just take the test or go back home, get the letter and prove I didn't have to take it. I took the test and passed (thankfully) but that was nerve wrecking.
     
  • wenrob

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Apr 14, 2008
    So here’s what it says on our DMV website. If you’ll notice on the section for “name change” it says that if the documents listed above contain your current full legal name to skip this section. Mine did. I wasn’t changing my name it had been my legal name for 25 years at that point. The DMV, SSA etc. had all received my legal name change 25 years prior. The way this reads I didn’t need my marriage license.
    85BE0DF7-828C-4FFB-B8BB-DF17314E723C.jpeg2BB65AA9-B9DA-432E-A3BE-512584CADC5B.jpeg
     

    3threebabies

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Dec 6, 2018
    The biggest issue I had when I got mine, was that it was also a renewal and their records showed I had to take the written exam too. My renewal letter didn't state that but I didn't have it with me, so I either could just take the test or go back home, get the letter and prove I didn't have to take it. I took the test and passed (thankfully) but that was nerve wrecking.
    That would be the worst!!
     
    Joined
    Oct 23, 2015
    You'd think it would be the same in all 50 states :confused3 but then again it is our government ... they tend to do things insanely stupid at times.:upsidedow

    I don't think I have the states official Marriage Certificate. I was married in PA. And I do recall how "lovely" they are to deal with. That's going to be a load of fun.

    I just think if you have your birth certificate, SS, Passport, state DL, and proof of residency you should be good. I mean, you needed the proof to change your SS and Passport. They can find your trail. It isn't that hard. Even when I have white paged myself online I can see my maiden name in there. If white pages can find me, you'd think it wouldn't be that difficult.
    I believe the marriage certificate comes in play when names aren't matching.

    If you didn't change your DL, your passport or your SS card...well then your name wouldn't match. That's when you should need to show why your name is no longer X but is instead Y.

    For example I could have not opted to change my name legally and just used my married name on non-official things. I had my SS card with my maiden name, I had my birth certificate with my maiden name, I could have left my DL with my maiden name, I even had my passport with my maiden name. In order to change any of those (aside from the birth certificate) I had to show the reason for the name change. As mine was marriage I needed to show a certified copy of my marriage certificate.
     

    3threebabies

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Dec 6, 2018
    So here’s what it says on our DMV website. If you’ll notice on the section for “name change” it says that if the documents listed above contain your current full legal name to skip this section. Mine did. I wasn’t changing my name it had been my legal name for 25 years at that point. The DMV, SSA etc. had all received my legal name change 25 years prior. The way this reads I didn’t need my marriage license.
    View attachment 420444View attachment 420445
    I am pretty sure some states were already Real ID compatible—as were passport guidelines obviously. The other side is why many states kept filing for extensions. PA actually had to pass a law making Real ID requirements legal.
     

    Imzadi

    ♥ Saved by an angel in a trench coat!
    Joined
    Oct 29, 2004
    I just renewed my license a couple of days ago, got the Enhanced and had no problem. I brought in all the necessary paperwork including my birth certificate and my marriage certificate.
    All the info for NY residents is online. You go through a checklist of appropriate and needed ID documentation so you know exactly what to bring to DMV.
    I don't really see the problem.
    Yes, I read the info for getting an Enhanced drivers license for NYC a while back. It didn't seem as complicated as the OP states for a Real ID. :confused3

    I have Mary Jane Doe on my SS card & birth certificate. But, my drivers license says Mary J Doe. I havve no passport. Am I going to have a problem getting an Enhanced drivers license?
     

    kaytieeldr

    Post hoc, ergo propter hoc
    Joined
    Jun 11, 2005
    That is nice for you. In PA it is about double regular license renewal:( I chose not to give them anymore money and will just use passport.
    Okay, that's nice for you. For someone with no passport or foreseeable plans to travel outside the country, I can't imagine the PA Real ID costs anywhere close to a passport.
     

    Hikergirl

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Feb 28, 2016
    Yes, I read the info for getting an Enhanced drivers license for NYC a while back. It didn't seem as complicated as the OP states for a Real ID. :confused3

    I have Mary Jane Doe on my SS card & birth certificate. But, my drivers license says Mary J Doe. I havve no passport. Am I going to have a problem getting an Enhanced drivers license?
    It is the same requirements as Real ID. You just have the option of paying extra to make it "enhanced" so you don't need a passport to go to Canada, Mexico and the Caribbean (although it says "some" countries but isn't specific). If you are renewing it is your renewal fee plus $30. I don't know what it would be if you aren't up for renewal but I'm sure the info is on the DMV site.
    My SS card, birth certificate and marriage license say Mary Jane Doe but my driver's license says Mary J Doe. so you shouldn't have any issue. You need to also bring in a mortgage statement, or utility bill that has your current address on it.
     

    fly girl

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Jan 20, 2012
    I believe the marriage certificate comes in play when names aren't matching.

    If you didn't change your DL, your passport or your SS card...well then your name wouldn't match. That's when you should need to show why your name is no longer X but is instead Y.

    For example I could have not opted to change my name legally and just used my married name on non-official things. I had my SS card with my maiden name, I had my birth certificate with my maiden name, I could have left my DL with my maiden name, I even had my passport with my maiden name. In order to change any of those (aside from the birth certificate) I had to show the reason for the name change. As mine was marriage I needed to show a certified copy of my marriage certificate.
    But here is the thing in Ohio.

    You have your Maiden name on Birth Certificate

    You got married. You changed your last name. When you did, you went to SS office and used your Marriage Certificate. (the pretty one with the gold letters)
    You have your Married name on SS
    You then changed your DL to match new married name. Since you have your SS and DL, Passport follows suit.
    You have your Married name on DL
    You have your Married name on Passport


    Now to get REAL ID, your Marriage Certificate you once used to prove you got married to SS is no longer valid. They don't take the pretty one with gold letters. You now have to contact the county in which you were married and obtain a certified and notarized copy.

    The problem lies in the fact the Marriage Certificate the SS office accepted, isn't being accepted by your state. And that's how the frustration snowballs. Especially if you were married in a different state.
     

    3threebabies

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Dec 6, 2018
    Okay, that's nice for you. For someone with no passport or foreseeable plans to travel outside the country, I can't imagine the PA Real ID costs anywhere close to a passport.
    You are correct, it is nice for me that I already had a passport and am able to choose to pass on state issued Real ID. It is an unnecessary expense for me and also saves me an extra visit to the DMV. I find it unfortunate for those who have to pay extra for Real ID. I wish all states were like SC and @OhhBother.
     



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