Rational or Irrational?

[Papa Deuce]

My mom won't move into a house because there is a woman on the block that she thinks is the most eveil person in the world. The house is ABSOLUTELY PERFECT for what she needs and wants in a home.... this lady would be about 6 houses away from her. They are all single homes.

It isn't like my mom would run into her on the street, as my mom can barely walk 50 yards, and never walks if she doesn't have to. Plus the home she would get "IF" this lady didn't live on this block has LOTS of privacy because of bushes and trees.

The house really is exactly what she needs considering her medical condition. You would have to hear her rants to understand why I think she is being irrational.

She hasn't even seen this lady in 10+ years. In fact, the woman could even be dead for all my mom knows, but she knows where she THINKS this lady lives.

 

[KristaTX]

There's no way for us to say "rational" or "irrational" unless we know why your mom thinks the lady is evil. Did the lady do something hurtful to your mom or someone else in the past? Or does she just have the physical appearance of a witch? It all depends on what this woman did or didn't do, and your mom's reasons for not liking her.

 

[TheDisneyTraveler06]

I agree with the previous post. I wouldn't call this "irrational". If she's not happy with her neighbors, then I wouldn't want her to move in and not be completely happy. That's my opinion.

 

[Stacerita]

Irrational! But then again, I know a lot of elderly women who are irrational, but it doesnt matter. If they think they are rational, nothing can make them change their mind. My nana is like that. She wont talk to neighbors and will curse them under her breath, because they might have let their kids walk across our lawn. Mind you, that could have happened 40 years ago and said kids are now in the 50's. Irrational yes, but to her is makes perfect sense.

You said the lady might not be alive. Maybe you could find out if thats true or not and if she is no longing living, then your mom wouldn't have issue with the new place. And if the lady does infact still live there, the place isn't absolutely perfect. Its only absolutely perfect if your mom is happy to be there.

But yeah, I think its irrational.

 

[crazyme5kids]

Maybe the house or move is not what she really wants so she is using the irrational thought as her way of not being pushed into it. Does that make ant sense?

 

[Disney Doll]

I have learned in my 44 years of life that mothers are not always rational.

It's irrational, but Mom is not going to be happy there, no matter what, so why bother?

Unless you can find out if the "evil one" lives where your Mom thinks she lives. If she doesn't, you may have a chance of getting her into the perfect house.

 

[Papa Deuce]

Maybe the house or move is not what she really wants so she is using the irrational thought as her way of not being pushed into it. Does that make ant sense?

It makes sense, but in this case, it isn't the reason. She asked me to look for a home for her, and once she heard which street it was on, she wen't on a wild rant about this other lady. So, she never even saw the house.

It meets all the criteria that she asked me to look for.

 

[freckles and boo]

I am sorry, but I have to ask this. Does your mom just hate this person or does she truly appear to be delusional and think she is actually evil? I ask because a mentally unstable neighbor of my brother and SIL's put a bullet through my young niece's bedroom window - right over her bed. Terrifying. She really believed my SIL was a "European Witch", whatever that meant. I am not suggesting your mom is dangerous, but if she is delusional you should talk to her doctor and not let her live alone! Good luck.

 

[Cool-Beans]

I dunno. But not sure that it makes much difference. She's got the right to live where she pleases, right?

Is very nice of you to help mom. Good son.

 

[Papa Deuce]

I am sorry, but I have to ask this. Does your mom just hate this person or does she truly appear to be delusional and think she is actually evil? I ask because a mentally unstable neighbor of my brother and SIL's put a bullet through my young niece's bedroom window - right over her bed. Terrifying. She really believed my SIL was a "European Witch", whatever that meant. I am not suggesting your mom is dangerous, but if she is delusional you should talk to her doctor and not let her live alone! Good luck.

No, she isn't delusional. Maybe irrational, but not delusional.

 

[freckles and boo]

No, she isn't delusional. Maybe irrational, but not delusional.

That is good to hear! Keep looking. From what I hear, it is a buyer's market.

 

[momrek06]

I dunno. But not sure that it makes much difference. She's got the right to live where she pleases, right?

Is very nice of you to help mom. Good son.

ITA !!! So, now Papa: what you need to do, ever so nicely (speaking from one whose own mom is 80yo and some days I get so with her statements)....is ask mom, "Mom, are there any other streets, roads, avenues, lanes that you do not want me looking at houses on sooo we do not go through this again!"...PERIOD!!!

 

[Papa Deuce]

ITA !!! So, now Papa: what you need to do, ever so nicely (speaking from one whose own mom is 80yo and some days I get so with her statements)....is ask mom, "Mom, are there any other streets, roads, avenues, lanes that you do not want me looking at houses on sooo we do not go through this again!"...PERIOD!!!

I guess.... but she wants to live 3 or 4 blocks away from me at most, so there aren't many houses for sale at any given point. And, she needs a first floor BR and bath, and a driveway that takes her to her front door....

This ain't gonna be easy, but I'll keep trying. We have mostly Cape Cods where we live.

 

[momrek06]

I guess.... but she wants to live 3 or 4 blocks away from me at most, so there aren't many houses for sale at any given point. And, she needs a first floor BR and bath, and a driveway that takes her to her front door....

This ain't gonna be easy, but I'll keep trying. We have mostly Cape Cods where we live.

Well, Papa, if that one house you found is really a sweet deal and perfect for mom, MAYBE you could check out if the "evil lady" is in fact still even living on that street and is in fact even still alive???

 

[Papa Deuce]

Well, Papa, if that one house you found is really a sweet deal and perfect for mom, MAYBE you could check out if the "evil lady" is in fact still even living on that street and is in fact even still alive???

Already in the works. Thsi lady worked with my mom and brother. He is going to his HR tomorrow to see if they still have an address on her. If they do, I will take it from there..... I sure hope she has moved! BTW, she probably is alive...

I just called my brother and he can't remember this woman's last name, but he says she is around his age.... so that would make her about 40. And, he did confirm that she was not a nice lady at all, but that it wouldn't stop him from living on the street as long as she was at least 3 -4 houses away. He said he would NEVER live next door to her.

 

[momrek06]

Already in the works. Thsi lady worked with my mom and brother. He is going to his HR tomorrow to see if they still have an address on her. If they do, I will take it from there..... I sure hope she has moved! BTW, she probably is alive...

I just called my brother and he can't remember this woman's last name, but he says she is around his age.... so that would make her about 40. And, he did confirm that she was not a nice lady at all, but that it wouldn't stop him from living on the street as long as she was at least 3 -4 houses away. He said he would NEVER live next door to her.

Well good then, hopefully, for mom's sake, she has indeed moved away...and if not and she is still on the street...3-4 houses away should be fine. And in that case, you and your bro can, maybe, hopefully convince mom that living 3-4 houses away should be no problem for mom at all.

Papa, keep us updated as bro does his "mini" investigation.

 

[paigevz]

Some folks can make the whole neighborhood miserable. If your mom's not happy living near her, then keep looking..................

 

[Papa Deuce]

Well good then, hopefully, for mom's sake, she has indeed moved away...and if not and she is still on the street...3-4 houses away should be fine. And in that case, you and your bro can, maybe, hopefully convince mom that living 3-4 houses away should be no problem for mom at all.

Papa, keep us updated as bro does his "mini" investigation.

Well, it turns out that the lady does live there, but this house would be 14 SINGLE homes away from the one I think would be perfect for my mom. I was driving past the home today when I saw the lady who owned the home I had interest in. She was out front. Very nice, friendly lady.

She knew of the lady that my mom wants to avoid. She said that the lady had an "episode" about 5 or 6 years ago, where the police were called, but other than that, the worst thing this woman does is yell loudly at her children, as far as she knows.

So, I have been trying to reach my mom to try to get her to at least take a look. I know my mom..... it ain't gonna happen...... and she thinks I am stubborn! well, I am, but I am not irrational.

 

[momrek06]

Well, it turns out that the lady does live there, but this house would be 14 SINGLE homes away from the one I think would be perfect for my mom. I was driving past the home today when I saw the lady who owned the home I had interest in. She was out front. Very nice, friendly lady.

She knew of the lady that my mom wants to avoid. She said that the lady had an "episode" about 5 or 6 years ago, where the police were called, but other than that, the worst thing this woman does is yell loudly at her children, as far as she knows.

So, I have been trying to reach my mom to try to get her to at least take a look. I know my mom..... it ain't gonna happen...... and she thinks I am stubborn! well, I am, but I am not irrational.

PAPA: Maybe if you DRAW UP a sort of layout of the street....(we do this all the time with our business)...note the house MOM would live in and then note the house of the "evil" lady and she can see on paper just how far away "evil" would be, maybe she would "consider" this option. Explain to her the benefits of the actual house...first floor etc etc!!! This may help her realize it is not going to bad after-all!!!

 

[doxdogy]

You can also check through the property appraiser's office. Our property appraiser information can be checked online. So you may want to check that route too.