Rate Your Happiness ?

[mrodgers]

Currently a 1

1.5 years separated. I pay to provide a home for my 2 kids with their mother, thus I can't afford a home for them with me or a home for myself. Been at my mother's house at age 44 for 1.5 years. Ready to put a bullet in my head, seriously.

Save up, give it all to a lawyer. Save up again, give it all to a lawyer. Lawyer is finally about done, just nickel and diming me now. Save up, car is junk. $4000 worth of parts for a $1000 car. Put it in a downpayment on a new car. Broke again.

I won't be able to afford a simple apartment for the next 5 years until the oldest is out of school. I won't be in a house for at least 10 years. So, I cashed in all my vacation time (5 weeks) instead of taking a break at work and threw that along with tax return in the savings. I have $9,000. Looking for a mobile home. No 2 bedrooms around. That's OK, I'd rather have 3 so each of the girls can have their own rooms at my place. Whoops, all the 25 year old mobile homes everyone seems to think they go up in value. $30k for the same thing I sold 3 years old in 2000 for $16k. Guess a mobile home is out of the question.

Next step, I have a tent, sleeping bag, and my car. That's where I'm going to be living here shortly. Oh, but of course I take care of my kids so they have a home with their mother. Doesn't matter that Dad is homeless.

I'm all for child support for the dead beat dads but it's ridiculous that child support puts so many dads who want to be around for their kids out on the streets. $65,000/year and homeless. Child support is so fair!

 

[ThistleMae]

Currently a 1

1.5 years separated. I pay to provide a home for my 2 kids with their mother, thus I can't afford a home for them with me or a home for myself. Been at my mother's house at age 44 for 1.5 years. Ready to put a bullet in my head, seriously.

Save up, give it all to a lawyer. Save up again, give it all to a lawyer. Lawyer is finally about done, just nickel and diming me now. Save up, car is junk. $4000 worth of parts for a $1000 car. Put it in a downpayment on a new car. Broke again.

I won't be able to afford a simple apartment for the next 5 years until the oldest is out of school. I won't be in a house for at least 10 years. So, I cashed in all my vacation time (5 weeks) instead of taking a break at work and threw that along with tax return in the savings. I have $9,000. Looking for a mobile home. No 2 bedrooms around. That's OK, I'd rather have 3 so each of the girls can have their own rooms at my place. Whoops, all the 25 year old mobile homes everyone seems to think they go up in value. $30k for the same thing I sold 3 years old in 2000 for $16k. Guess a mobile home is out of the question.

Next step, I have a tent, sleeping bag, and my car. That's where I'm going to be living here shortly. Oh, but of course I take care of my kids so they have a home with their mother. Doesn't matter that Dad is homeless.

I'm all for child support for the dead beat dads but it's ridiculous that child support puts so many dads who want to be around for their kids out on the streets. $65,000/year and homeless. Child support is so fair!

I have seen this same trouble with so many divorcing dads. Lot's of times it depends on the state you live in and the judge. My nephew just finalized his divorce and it was messy. I'm sure you can imagine how much $ went to argue about visitation and child support. If it wasn't for my sister, his mother, bailing him out, he would have been in exactly the same situation as you. I'm sorry I don't have any suggestions, other than winging it until the kids turn 18. It's a very sad situation. I hope, through all of this, you can find happiness once again.

 

[bellebud]

Currently a 1

1.5 years separated. I pay to provide a home for my 2 kids with their mother, thus I can't afford a home for them with me or a home for myself. Been at my mother's house at age 44 for 1.5 years. Ready to put a bullet in my head, seriously.

Save up, give it all to a lawyer. Save up again, give it all to a lawyer. Lawyer is finally about done, just nickel and diming me now. Save up, car is junk. $4000 worth of parts for a $1000 car. Put it in a downpayment on a new car. Broke again.

I won't be able to afford a simple apartment for the next 5 years until the oldest is out of school. I won't be in a house for at least 10 years. So, I cashed in all my vacation time (5 weeks) instead of taking a break at work and threw that along with tax return in the savings. I have $9,000. Looking for a mobile home. No 2 bedrooms around. That's OK, I'd rather have 3 so each of the girls can have their own rooms at my place. Whoops, all the 25 year old mobile homes everyone seems to think they go up in value. $30k for the same thing I sold 3 years old in 2000 for $16k. Guess a mobile home is out of the question.

Next step, I have a tent, sleeping bag, and my car. That's where I'm going to be living here shortly. Oh, but of course I take care of my kids so they have a home with their mother. Doesn't matter that Dad is homeless.

I'm all for child support for the dead beat dads but it's ridiculous that child support puts so many dads who want to be around for their kids out on the streets. $65,000/year and homeless. Child support is so fair!

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. It seems grossly unfair and like it's from the 80's. Usually today moms and dads get 50/50 custody, and 50/50 paying for the kids. Sometimes the main house needs to be sold so that mom and dad can both have smaller places to live. Again, so sorry.

 

[ThistleMae]

GOING OFF TOPIC FOR A SECOND: In Maine, the court looks at both incomes and bases child support, in part, on the difference between Mom and Dad's income. So if you have a spouse who chooses to work less hours or not work at all, you are supposed to make up the difference by way of child support to supplement that spouses lack of income. And this is where alimony can come in. Sorry for the rant, it's just frustrating. So sorry about your situation. You need a little magic!

 

[Magpie]

Currently a 1

1.5 years separated. I pay to provide a home for my 2 kids with their mother, thus I can't afford a home for them with me or a home for myself. Been at my mother's house at age 44 for 1.5 years. Ready to put a bullet in my head, seriously.

Save up, give it all to a lawyer. Save up again, give it all to a lawyer. Lawyer is finally about done, just nickel and diming me now. Save up, car is junk. $4000 worth of parts for a $1000 car. Put it in a downpayment on a new car. Broke again.

I won't be able to afford a simple apartment for the next 5 years until the oldest is out of school. I won't be in a house for at least 10 years. So, I cashed in all my vacation time (5 weeks) instead of taking a break at work and threw that along with tax return in the savings. I have $9,000. Looking for a mobile home. No 2 bedrooms around. That's OK, I'd rather have 3 so each of the girls can have their own rooms at my place. Whoops, all the 25 year old mobile homes everyone seems to think they go up in value. $30k for the same thing I sold 3 years old in 2000 for $16k. Guess a mobile home is out of the question.

Next step, I have a tent, sleeping bag, and my car. That's where I'm going to be living here shortly. Oh, but of course I take care of my kids so they have a home with their mother. Doesn't matter that Dad is homeless.

I'm all for child support for the dead beat dads but it's ridiculous that child support puts so many dads who want to be around for their kids out on the streets. $65,000/year and homeless. Child support is so fair!

I'm so sorry you're going through all this.

One of our good friends ended up the sole custodial parent for his severely disabled daughter and son, while his ex-wife was the one supposed to pay alimony and child support. But, it's been a constant battle. He spent awhile homeless living on friends' couches, with his kids in tow.

I am honestly in awe that he's managed to make it through each day.

 

[MIGrandma]

I'm going to go with 8.

I'm basically very happy with life in general. I have a wonderful husband of going on 42 years, two awesome adult children that we are very close to, a wonderful son-in-law and equally wonderful daughter-in-law, terrific grandchildren (with our first GREATgrandchild coming in September!!), a nice home, we're not rich by any means as far as $$ goes but we are able to do some traveling and we own property up north and spend a lot of time up there during the warm weather months, I have a lot of hobbies/interests I enjoy, and I'm retired.

We have some health issues, but not as many as some and we count our blessings for that.

I guess the reason I didn't say 9 or 10 is because I'm unhappy with myself in one aspect, the fact that I can't seem to find enough willpower to stick to a life-changing "diet" and get rid of 30 pounds for good. It's my own fault, I have no one else to blame and I know that until I make the commitment myself it ain't gonna happen. If I could manage to get that part of my life under control I'd give myself a 9 or 10.

 

[BillSears]

I average a 7. Some rare days it could be a 2, some days are a 10. But it averages out to a 7. Most of the lower numbers occur due to health issues for me or a family member. It could also be when a family member is hurting or in a bad situation and I can't do anything to help. 10s are rare but usually occur in special times with family or when I'm traveling and something amazing happens. On most days I'm a 7, content and doing OK.

 

[ThistleMae]

Life has a way of getting in the way, doesn't it? Perception has so much more to do with your level of happiness than anything else. Some of us are just so resilient, while others struggle to find even the smallest grain of happiness. I'm glad I was born with the Happy gene....it takes a lot to get me down, and the simplest things make me smile. Disney Trips get me the most excited...I just love to see people enjoying themselves.

 

[ThistleMae]

I would rate my happiness a 10 if Free Dining is offered for my next Disney trip!

 

[BrianL]

Last week I'd have rated it pretty low, but I finally got away to WDW for a few days and am feeling pretty good now, so 9/10 for the moment! It was my first shred of time off since August.

 

[ThistleMae]

Last week I'd have rated it pretty low, but I finally got away to WDW for a few days and am feeling pretty good now, so 9/10 for the moment! It was my first shred of time off since August.

Awesome! Great that you could get away and refill your happiness meter!