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The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
 
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I awoke on Friday and because the universe is expanding it took me longer than usual to find my robe. This made me late leaving for work and, because the concept of up and down is relative, the elevator that I got into went to the roof, where it was very difficult to hail a taxi.
 

Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.
 
To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world.
 
A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.
 
Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget.
 
A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked
 
Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend.
 
true friendship isn't about being there when it's convenient; it's about being there when it's not.
 
What you call dog with no legs?
Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come.
 

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