question about instant messaging and privacy

[luvflorida]

I've asked this of several friends, but I've gotten differing replies. Maybe someone here knows the answer. Is it possible, when using AIM, to have someone put you on their buddy list without your knowledge? For example, could someone put my daughter's screen name, assuming they know it, on their buddy list without her knowledge?

If so, then couldn't someone know when my daughter is on AIM without her knowing it?

 

[Fantasmic303]

Yes and yes, unless you set your preferences to only allow her name to show up for people on her buddy list.

If you are not familiar with how to set that, I'd be more than happy to walk you through it.

 

[chell]

Yes, you can add someone to your AIM buddy list without their knowledge. You can adjust her settings though.

 

[luvflorida]

I would love to know how to fix her settings. There is a "friend" of hers who only seems to call the house when my daughter goes on IM. I'm figuring he knows she is at home because he has her screen name on his IM.

 

[chell]

If you open up AIM go to 'My AIM'. Select 'Edit Options', then 'Edit Preferences'. Click on the 'Privacy' category. Here is where you can set the options you want. Let me know if you have any problems. Also, if you know this person's screen name you can block them (so they can not tell she is on-line) on this screen.

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

<font color=navy>The problem with blocking a screen name, though, is if they get another screen name - then they know that she's blocking them - so it's better to only allow certain names than to block certain names.

Good luck

 

[Cruisin]

How old is your daughter?

Maybe you better ask first if she wants to block this person, she may not want to. She might not appreciate it if you do it without her approval.

 

[luvflorida]

Chell- Thanks so much! I did manage to change her settings.

Cruisin'Kroezes- My daughter is 13. She doesn't know the screen name of the person who calls her, and she really doesn't want to do anything to anger him. She just finds him annoying and would rather he didn't know when she is on IM. Hopefully, the setting change will fix the problem.

 

[Cruisin]

In the situation that you have described then it sounds like a good idea. If your daughter doesn't want to encourage it, then you have helped her to find a solution to the problem. Maybe the boy will get the hint and leave her alone.
Good luck.

 

[DNSDisney]

even if you block all screen names from knowing your daughter is online they can still go to members directory and it will tell them she is online even if they are blocked.
I would suggest your daughter change her sn alltogether and it would solve the problem . He then of course won't know it.