Put Down Your Phones!

[Sehart497]

I see this everywhere I go. I have noticed a new generation of parenting. The type that thinks a device in front of their child is perfectly acceptable. The issue I take with it is the device is placed in front of the child in places that used to be places where families would go to have quality time together. I also believe that children need to learn to he patient when adults are having a conversation or when they are waiting for their food. It is important to teach self control and patience.

 

[surferdave]

I have a smartphone and use it a lot but I think I am much more engaged now than when I seemed to be stuck behind a video camera for the first five years of my daughter's life watching every minute of every big event on a tiny screen, because everyone seemed to think everything had to be video taped back then. We don't watch any of those now except some of the Disney ones. It was nice to see some dance recitals with my own eyes when that fad passed.

I'm not so on board the anti-smartphone rage because it doesn't affect me that much when someone else is doing it (driving aside). The previous rage I remember was against bluetooth earpieces because apparently people hated seeing other people on the phone using one.

My last tech rage was against the old redneck radios; the two way chirping phones like Nextel sold. Those things were horribly inconsiderate and I'm glad they died away.

All that said, if you haven't checked it out, go listen to the DIS Unplugged podcast on using social media in the parks, they have some great tips!

 

[bluejasmine]

Dh and I do take our smart phones with us, we like to update on instagram and facebook and check in with family, take pics, but also you can use your phone to check wait times, find character greetings and make dining reservations.

I will say we arent on our phones but when we are in line or waiting for something, we enjoy our rides, shows, and meals w/o being on our phones constant.

 

[okeydokey]

I think generally parents are MORE involved with their kids than parents of years ago. I know that is true in my family. I spend a lot more time with my kids than my parents did with me and my mom was a SAHM. If I check my phone while waiting in line or hand my phone to one of my kids, you don't need to feel sorry for poor us, we are quite happy, thank you.

 

[Gracie09]

I haven't read the whole thread but I guess my opinion is why do you care what other people do. As long as they aren't walking into you while texting it none of your business. My husband and I both worked high stress have to be available jobs. Our phones allowed us to stay in contact with our offices and take care of business. Sometimes that is just the way it is. Did our daughter care, no she was at Disney.
But you know what's rude, the gy behind me on the dole whip line who made a big deal about me checking email while waiting. He kept going on and on about how he couldn't do that and I should put my phone away. That was rude.

 

[LoKiHB]

The nature of my work is such that I need to be able to be reached in an emergency, regardless of where I am. It doesn't happen too often, and when I do go away, I know that my team is left in capable hands.

That being said, I will check my phone occasionally during the day- let's say a quick glance every 45 minutes to an hour. If there is nothing there, I put it back in my pocket.

There are times when my wife will go off with my older son and I will sit and relax for a while with our little one while he is napping. At that point, yeah, the phone usually comes out just to keep me occupied. However, I do find myself ignoring the phone more often and just watching the world go by when at Disney.

Also, keep in mind that these days, many people use their phones as cameras as well.

As for kids at dinner on the phone playing games... I have a 7 year old with ADHD and ODD. Between the over stimulation of being at Disney, the long days (even though we are the more relaxed touring type), and the fact that his medication is winding down usually about the time we settle in for dinner, keeping him occupied with Angry Birds, Fruit Ninja, Temple Run or whatever so Mommy and Daddy can also enjoy some quiet time - after all, it is our vacation too - is not something I am opposed too. He plays his game, he's happy, and we're all nice and calm and quiet.

We have spent the entire day together at this point, and letting him unwind in that manner is what works for him and for our family. We have been that family that has cell phones out at the table during meals, but it is also the only time we have to catch up on the rest of our lives outside Disney. For the most part, my wife is sending pictures from the day to the rest of the family. As much as we want to get away from life, it still keeps going while we're on vacation.

Cell phones and tablets are a part of modern life. I do agree with the original poster though that some people do take it too far and that in general people need to slow down and enjoy life.

 

[Magpie]

I see this everywhere I go. I have noticed a new generation of parenting. The type that thinks a device in front of their child is perfectly acceptable. The issue I take with it is the device is placed in front of the child in places that used to be places where families would go to have quality time together. I also believe that children need to learn to he patient when adults are having a conversation or when they are waiting for their food. It is important to teach self control and patience.

My daughter could read by the time she was 2 1/2. All I ever had to do to keep her quiet when we went out was hand the kid a book. People would smile at me, and total strangers would tell me what a GOOD parent I was. It was sweet! And my kid wasn't any more trouble to me than a houseplant, for however long I liked.

My son wasn't so keen on reading, despite me teaching him when he was 3. When we were out, the only thing that interested him was his DS - a handheld gaming device. We'd line up for a movie, I'd give his sister a book, and I'd hand him his DS. And people would start frowning. My boy may have been solving puzzles and conquering virtual worlds, but I never got a single compliment on my parenting while he did it.

Would we all be on our devices at dinner in Disney? No, since it's 75 cents a text when we're roaming. But we might all be reading, looking at maps, checking out newspapers, etc... Would it make me "sad" to see another family looking at their devices? Certainly not!

What makes me sad is seeing parents yelling at their kids. Hitting their kids. Placating obese preschoolers with candy. Giving a toddler a caffeinated beverage and then getting mad at them for being twitchy. Abusing cast members. Being rude to the people around them.

But it's been this way forever, and shouting, "PEOPLE, STOP GIVING YOUR BABIES CAFFEINE", won't change anything.

So, I let it go. And instead, I try to practice compassion, and work on being a better, less-judgemental person.

 

[momofboyz3]

The nature of my work is such that I need to be able to be reached in an emergency, regardless of where I am. It doesn't happen too often, and when I do go away, I know that my team is left in capable hands.

That being said, I will check my phone occasionally during the day- let's say a quick glance every 45 minutes to an hour. If there is nothing there, I put it back in my pocket.

There are times when my wife will go off with my older son and I will sit and relax for a while with our little one while he is napping. At that point, yeah, the phone usually comes out just to keep me occupied. However, I do find myself ignoring the phone more often and just watching the world go by when at Disney.

Also, keep in mind that these days, many people use their phones as cameras as well.

As for kids at dinner on the phone playing games... I have a 7 year old with ADHD and ODD. Between the over stimulation of being at Disney, the long days (even though we are the more relaxed touring type), and the fact that his medication is winding down usually about the time we settle in for dinner, keeping him occupied with Angry Birds, Fruit Ninja, Temple Run or whatever so Mommy and Daddy can also enjoy some quiet time - after all, it is our vacation too - is not something I am opposed too. He plays his game, he's happy, and we're all nice and calm and quiet.

We have spent the entire day together at this point, and letting him unwind in that manner is what works for him and for our family. We have been that family that has cell phones out at the table during meals, but it is also the only time we have to catch up on the rest of our lives outside Disney. For the most part, my wife is sending pictures from the day to the rest of the family. As much as we want to get away from life, it still keeps going while we're on vacation.

Cell phones and tablets are a part of modern life. I do agree with the original poster though that some people do take it too far and that in general people need to slow down and enjoy life.

This! I agree w/this post as I do many others I've read on here. Nobody knows the reason behind someone's iPhone. Whether for your business or career, whether checkin in on an elderly grandparent or sending someone a photo. Or just distracting a child that might need that. Why do people feel they have to defend themselves to those who judge? I never understand this. I have a friend who judges me because the food I allow my children might have preservatives. I've been judged for being a working mother. Nobody is perfect. Express an opinion is fine, disagreement is fine but all this judging one another drives me bonkers.

 

[atwmommy]

Technology is creeping everywhere! I just read they are encouraging Boy Scouts to bring their phones to the Jamboree ( usually a huge no-no when camping) to learn about the area and share info. They set up 250 hot spots.

I personally want my family to use less on vacation, but know we need it some for pictures and communication (different age groups, need to split up some).

 

[Magpie]

I see this everywhere I go. I have noticed a new generation of parenting. The type that thinks a device in front of their child is perfectly acceptable. The issue I take with it is the device is placed in front of the child in places that used to be places where families would go to have quality time together. I also believe that children need to learn to he patient when adults are having a conversation or when they are waiting for their food. It is important to teach self control and patience.

I know! Isn't it awful when parents stick a BOOK in front of their child in a restaurant?

Oh wait, that wasn't the device you meant? Were you perhaps talking about a colouring placemat and crayons?

Even when I was a child in the 70's, my mother didn't believe in making me sit in silence at a restaurant table without anything to entertain myself while the adults talked.

 

[Southernmiss]

What about these new fangled things called microwaves for cooking food. Smh. It was sooo much better to go gather wood and start a fire...exercise, togetherness, time spent together. Dont get me started on the invention of the wheel. Wow, was that a doozy...

There will always be new technology, we have to adapt and change with the times.

 

[TiggerBouncy]

Personally, I am against overly checking your phones while you are on vacation. However I generally do have to check my email a few times a day in case something blows up while I am gone. Further, I use text as an easy way to meet up with my brother who sometimes brings his family the same weekend I bring mine.

I also know a couple of small business owners who literally can't take a vacation as they have to process sales and stuff while they are on vacation or sick or whatever. They CAN'T take 7 days off or their business might literally go under.

That said, I remember I was on the Disney Fantasy a few years ago and our dinner table mates spent almost $900 on facetime with the states during the cruise. That seemed excessive to me! I personally managed that ONE time to actually disconnect my phone and told people I just could not be available. There were some concequences to that, but it was worth it!

 

[Poohforyou]

Wow, it seems like there are a awful lot of people in this world paying close attention to complete strangers rather than using that time and energy to interact with their own families .

Honestly, unless someone's action directly impact me I don't give them a whole lot of thought. I imagine if someone saw a snapshot of my mothering my child and interacting with my family there could be a lot of judgement. I'd rather have a kid playing on a phone than whining and fussing.

 

[tjmj9801]

And don't get me started about the playgrounds. Moms heads buried in phones never once interacting. Some claim it is their time after SAH all day with kids. I get it, I am still there but check a few emails and then play with your kid some. Sad times when updating FB status is more important that watching your kid giggle and laughing.

Whoops! Looks like you skipped my post on the first page. Here it is again: http://www.scarymommy.com/dear-mom-judging-me/

 

[PrincessJo]

I really don't care what others are doing or not doing... UNLESS...

they are in front of me in line waiting at a CS restaurant and we've been in line for 20 minutes and we finally get to the CM to order and the family in front of us has been playing on their electronic devices this whole time and NOW they FINALLY try to decide what they want to eat, THANKS....

or we're behind a family in line waiting to get on a ride and we've been waiting for an hour and we're FINALLY at the front and a CM motions for the family in front of us to move down and NONE of them are paying attention because they are playing on their electronic devices and I have to tap them on the shoulder to wake them up...

THAT is when it's just plain rude. We (my family) play on our devices, but we know when to chill out and pay attention so as not to waste the time of others around us.

 

[Karbase8]

I see both sides, I have seen an overwhelming trend of overuse of technology, parents being "checked out" and this can be especially dangerous if they are driving their children not paying attention to the road or walking across the street texting while you and your baby in the stroller can be hit by a car. While in WDW, I have experienced people talking on their cellphone during an attraction or at dinner, and to me this just is not proper etiquette, if you are on the bus or walking and need to talk to someone that is different and I know myself I am guilty of texting too much and I think the OP point is maybe not judging per se but just observing that we have become a tech-reliable society and that human connection is getting lost in the mix. Technology is a great thing but it has it's cons just like everything else.

 

[LSUfan4444]

When has it become forbidden to make observations of something that has become increasingly obvious and commonplace? If the OP had come up to you in line or to your table and remonstrated you for placing your electronics over and above your family, then you would have a perfect right to object. But simply making an observation? Really? She wasn't attacking you personally.

Did you even read the name of thread? That's not simply "noticing" as you are trying to imply...that's flat out telling people to put their phones down.

People here have complained if others are on their phones in line, while walking, or while sitting down in a restaurant.

It isn't the noticing that anyone has a problem with, it's the implications that you, the OP, or anyone knows who or why is on their phone or for what reason. To then come to a message board and talk about the behavior as if there is something wrong with it (or to flat out stop doing it, like the OP suggests) causes people to become defensive....well, because you are being offensive. So yeah, notice my behavior. If you want to talk to your group about it, fine. As soon as you discuss my behavior with me, or in public, things change.

I notice people every day in tennis shoes or golf shirts....this is not the same thing, not even close.

 

[HippieChickadee]

I read an article just last week about people living life behind a screen instead of in person- that is- recording concerts so they only see it through a screen when they are there in person, recording the fireworks and parades when they are right there on the other side of the screen- all so they can share on social media how awesome these things are that you really aren't experiencing fully for yourself.

People are so concerned with who they aren't with instead of who they are with.

I think most everyone here took what was said wrong- and then took offense to it because you had your phone out in the parks before.

I don't think a business call, checking maps/wait times, looking up reservations, or even (for me anyway) games while waiting in line or for dinner is what is upsetting- it's very easy to tell those things from the frantic thumb typing I am talking about. It's the texting/emailing/facebooking that I'm talking about.

Do you really think we thought "ZOMG!!1! They JUST took a phone out of their pocket!! They are bad!!"

Come on people, be reasonable when you respond. We are talking about the extreme here- not you because you're checking a voice mail.

We are talking about the ones "thumbing" franticly in the middle of hall of presidents. The ones recording the whole carrasole of progress. Feeling bad for the family we saw who didn't look up during their entire meal because they were busy talking to people they weren't with. (I mean the entire meal- not waiting for food)

If the extreme isn't you- then why get so defensive?

Unless...

 

[LSUfan4444]

It's kind of hard not to notice it.

Nobody said you shouldn't notice it.

Bringing it publicly, to an open forum, in a negative connotation is more than noticing. People defending behavior that is WIDELY considered acceptable and even encouraged in many, MANY instances should only be accepted.

 

[LSUfan4444]

If the extreme isn't you- then why get so defensive?

Who made you judge and jury as to what cell phone activity is acceptable and what isn't?

The point is, you don't know why they are on their phones, how long they have been,who they are, etc.

And because you don't, coming to judgments about what they should or shouldn't be doing is completely irrational.

That's NOT "noticing".

Is the lady next to you that is "thumbing" franticly in the middle of hall of presidents responding to a facebook message from a family member in another country? Or just updating her status? YOU HAVE NO IDEA! If you do know (and are not just assuming), you are paying wayyyyy too much attention.

Alot of people who visit other countries (even Canada) to not activate their phones for cellular use, but when on wi-fi, can access facebook and texting apps to communicate with friends or family members (possibly someone just on the other side of the park).

The fact that you, or anyone else here feels they can set a standard as to what is an acceptable amount of time and or topic matter to discuss electronically is just way off base.

Whether you admit it or not, talking about something negatively or saying others need to stop (as the OP says) is more than noticing, it's judging. Often times, prematurely without the appropriate information to do so.