'Pregnant' man stuns medical profession

[wvjules]

Did your doctor tell you that you made him uncomfortable and because of such he would not treat you?

And I really do not think telling their story to the Advocate was "selling it to the highest bidder".

Why does your doctor even NEED to know if you're a lesbian, straight or bisexual? How did that subject even come up? I dont' recall a "sexual orientation" check box on the doctor's forms.

 

[Disney Doll]

and on the flip side, its discrimination to force a doctor into treating a patient who violates his religious beliefs which he is legally protected from exercising under the Constitution.

I guess my biggest issue with this whole thing is ultimately it boils down to a lesbian couple having a baby, and really whatever that doesn't bother me...what bothers me is its being successfully turned into a way to "push" an agenda. I support equal "rights" for gay couples...I do not support having an agenda shoved down my throat that if you have a religious or moral objection to homosexuality that you are a bigot...which has been stated several times in this thread. I'm a live and let live kind of person and what happens in your bedroom is your business...it doesn't need to be splashed all over the place as front page news (something this couple sought out by granting interviews and making media deals) and you do not need to force people to accept your lifestyle if you are unwilling to accept theirs.

You have a point.

 

[Disney Doll]

Why does your doctor even NEED to know if you're a lesbian, straight or bisexual? How did that subject even come up? I dont' recall a "sexual orientation" check box on the doctor's forms.

Well, a proper physical should include questions about lifestyle, social habits, sexual habits etc. My physician, who is also a close personal friend of both DH & mine, always asks me about spousal abuse at every physical. He knows me socially...he always asks about drinking habits, he always asks if I have any reason to think I may have an STD (either because of my own sexual behavior or any suspicions I might harbor about DH's sexual behavior), he always asks about recreational drug use...and again, I am a middle-aged woman who leads a pretty boring life, which is what I tell him. But, he doesn't live in my house, so he has no idea of the boring middle-aged persona that I present to the world is all of "me" or only part of "me". Any and all sexual practices, lifestyle practices etc,can impact health, and your MD should be aware of them.

Realistically, finding a doctor you can trust isn't always easy, regardless of what differences one may bring to the table. He is not my first doctor...I have been through a couple whose beliefs in how to interact with women patients didn't quite "mesh" with mine.

 

[HoneyBee06]

Oh come on...that's just messed up I really wish people would stop monkeying around with nature like this. I'm sure his decision had nothing to do with the media attention it would generate thereby opening the door for monetary possibilities sickening

I am not going to read this entire thread (as I feel I'll probably read things that anger me greatly.)

But I assume by "monkeying around with nature" you mean taking the testosterone and having the breasts removed?

Because in reality, he has a uterus still (even though he identifies himself as male) and therefore it's still nature for him to be pregnant.

Heterosexual couples "monkey" around with nature all the time too....fertility treatments and stuff of that nature. Some people really want children and prefer not to adopt. I don't see anything wrong with it. It's their choice.

I'm sure their child will grow up in a very loving enviornment.

 

[stacy347]

Why does your doctor even NEED to know if you're a lesbian, straight or bisexual? How did that subject even come up? I dont' recall a "sexual orientation" check box on the doctor's forms.

I was just going to ask this same question. Putting the baby issue completely aside (I've learned not to post on hot topics much around here ) ~ I really am curious as to how this would actually become an issue.

I'm pushing 40 years old, been seeing an OB/GYN since I was 14 (looong history of female problems) and even though every single doctor does ask if you are sexually active, I have never once had a doctor ask me to describe my sexual activity and quite frankly, if I did have one ask that, it would be the last time they'd see me. Sorry to go OT there but that really had me wondering.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Well, a proper physical should include questions about lifestyle, social habits, sexual habits etc. My physician, who is also a close personal friend of both DH & mine, always asks me about spousal abuse at every physical. He knows me socially...he always asks about drinking habits, he always asks if I have any reason to think I may have an STD (either because of my own sexual behavior or any suspicions I might harbor about DH's sexual behavior), he always asks about recreational drug use...and again, I am a middle-aged woman who leads a pretty boring life, which is what I tell him. But, he doesn't live in my house, so he has no idea of the boring middle-aged persona that I present to the world is all of "me" or only part of "me". Any and all sexual practices, lifestyle practices etc,can impact health, and your MD should be aware of them.

I had to chuckle at the part I bolded...that so used to be me, and not so long ago. Good for your doctor for asking the questions and really wanting to understand what's going on with his patients.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

and on the flip side, its discrimination to force a doctor into treating a patient who violates his religious beliefs which he is legally protected from exercising under the Constitution.

A doctor has a moral obligation to treat his patient. I do not care if he goes home and prays for his patient's sins. But in his office he has an obligation to provide care.

If it is OK in your view for him to NOT treat a patient who violates his beliefs - then the doctor should have a sign in his office of his beliefs so patients can recognize his bigotry. Also it should become a searchable criteria on health insurance websites - do you want a male homophobe? A female Wiccan?

The general public should have a way to know they might be looked down on if they see a particular doctor!

 

[Nikel]

I was just going to ask this same question. Putting the baby issue completely aside (I've learned not to post on hot topics much around here ) ~ I really am curious as to how this would actually become an issue.

I'm pushing 40 years old, been seeing an OB/GYN since I was 14 (looong history of female problems) and even though every single doctor does ask if you are sexually active, I have never once had a doctor ask me to describe my sexual activity and quite frankly, if I did have one ask that, it would be the last time they'd see me. Sorry to go OT there but that really had me wondering.

You've never been asked is you are practicing safe sex or asked about birth control?

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

I'm pushing 40 years old, been seeing an OB/GYN since I was 14 (looong history of female problems) and even though every single doctor does ask if you are sexually active, I have never once had a doctor ask me to describe my sexual activity and quite frankly, if I did have one ask that, it would be the last time they'd see me. Sorry to go OT there but that really had me wondering.

Really? I would wonder about a doctor who did NOT ask me about my activity. Just went to a new practice and the questions were quite extensive - have you had unprotected sex, do you have multiple partners, do you have anal intercourse, are you monogamous and if so how long, when did you become active, straight or bisexual etc.

Questions that give the doctor a better understanding of your risk factors. To protect my body I WANT someone to ask those questions.

 

[StrollPatrolMom]

A doctor has a moral obligation to treat his patient. I do not care if he goes home and prays for his patient's sins. But in his office he has an obligation to provide care.

If it is OK in your view for him to NOT treat a patient who violates his beliefs - then the doctor should have a sign in his office of his beliefs so patients can recognize his bigotry. Also it should become a searchable criteria on health insurance websites - do you want a male homophobe? A female Wiccan?

The general public should have a way to know they might be looked down on if they see a particular doctor!

I actually do not necessairly disagree with the idea that perhaps doctors could identify themselves are being open or friendly to certain communities of people...would have saved me a lot of trouble!

 

[PghLybrt]

Why does your doctor even NEED to know if you're a lesbian, straight or bisexual? How did that subject even come up? I dont' recall a "sexual orientation" check box on the doctor's forms.

Well, a proper physical should include questions about lifestyle, social habits, sexual habits etc. My physician, who is also a close personal friend of both DH & mine, always asks me about spousal abuse at every physical. He knows me socially...he always asks about drinking habits, he always asks if I have any reason to think I may have an STD (either because of my own sexual behavior or any suspicions I might harbor about DH's sexual behavior), he always asks about recreational drug use...and again, I am a middle-aged woman who leads a pretty boring life, which is what I tell him. But, he doesn't live in my house, so he has no idea of the boring middle-aged persona that I present to the world is all of "me" or only part of "me". Any and all sexual practices, lifestyle practices etc,can impact health, and your MD should be aware of them.

QUOTE]


Good answer.

For me personally I lead a very open life. I do not hide that fact that I am gay. I talk about my partner just as you all would talk about your husbands. The topic does come up. They want to know about your sexual history. I mean how can they not know when they ask you a question like this

"Could you be pregnant"
"no"
"Well are you sexually active"
"yes"
"well how can you be sure"

"Gee ,cause I do not have sex with men. " I think they get the point right about there that I might be a lesbian.

 

[stacy347]

You've never been asked is you are practicing safe sex or asked about birth control?

Yep, of course I have and those are pretty common sense questions to me and have nothing to do with my sexual orientation so that still doesn't stray from my question, which is why would this ever be an issue?

 

[stacy347]

QUOTE]


"Could you be pregnant"
"no"
"Well are you sexually active"
"yes"
"well how can you be sure"

"Gee ,cause I do not have sex with men. " I think they get the point right about there that I might be a lesbian.

Thank you for the straightforward answer, and I can totally see how that would play out .




chicagodisneyfan ~ I stand by my feelings that those things are personal and not something my doc will be discussing with me. As far as I am concerned, I should be getting the same treatment and regular/annual testing as every other woman in the practice and since my doctor's office has always been thorough in that regard, it has never been an issue for me.

 

[Nikel]

Yep, of course I have and those are pretty common sense questions to me and have nothing to do with my sexual orientation so that still doesn't stray from my question, which is why would this ever be an issue?

Actually, they do have something to do with sexual orientation. If you are in a heterosexual sexual relationship and NOT wanting to get pregnant, you're going to need birth control. A same sex couple is not.

 

[lillielil]

Good answer.

For me personally I lead a very open life. I do not hide that fact that I am gay. I talk about my partner just as you all would talk about your husbands. The topic does come up. They want to know about your sexual history. I mean how can they not know when they ask you a question like this

"Could you be pregnant"
"no"
"Well are you sexually active"
"yes"
"well how can you be sure"

"Gee ,cause I do not have sex with men. " I think they get the point right about there that I might be a lesbian.

Ditto everything. No, I'm not pregnant. No, I'm not "trying". Yes, I'm sexually active (and wearing a wedding ring). No, there really isn't the remotest possibility that I'm pregnant. How can I be sure? Well let me think... maybe because I've never been anywhere near anything that could cause me to become pregnant. I know basic biology pretty well, and besides, I think that if there were a way for us to magically get pregnant, we would have found it out by now.

It comes up. Trust me. And even if it doesn't, I'm not the sort of person to hide things.

 

[stacy347]

Actually, they do have something to do with sexual orientation. If you are in a heterosexual sexual relationship and NOT wanting to get pregnant, you're going to need birth control. A same sex couple is not.

My reply was in answer to the question itself which did not require a response to the doctor of what my sexual orientation is.

Both questions could have a simple yes or no answer ~ are you practicing safe sex? Yes.

Do you need birth control? No.

Like I posted above, I can totally understand how it would come up after thinking about the conversation PghLybrt suggested but those particular questions you refer to just wouldn't have ever caused me to think of stating my sexual orientation to the doc.

I think it's ridiculous that anyone should get second rate care and I hope that with all of you ladies standing up for yourselves, that will not continue to be the case. PghLybrt helped to answer my question and that's all I was wondering, so I'm done here.

 

[wvjules]

I got it now. It just took me a minute to get there.

 

[Nikel]

My reply was in answer to the question itself which did not require a response to the doctor of what my sexual orientation is.

Both questions could have a simple yes or no answer ~ are you practicing safe sex? Yes.

Do you need birth control? No.

Like I posted above, I can totally understand how it would come up after thinking about the conversation PghLybrt suggested but those particular questions you refer to just wouldn't have ever caused me to think of stating my sexual orientation to the doc.

I think it's ridiculous that anyone should get second rate care and I hope that with all of you ladies standing up for yourselves, that will not continue to be the case. PghLybrt helped to answer my question and that's all I was wondering, so I'm done here.

PghLybrt's example was exactly what I was getting to. Personally, I'd be very uncomfortable with an ob that wasn't asking about things like as I trying to get pregnant (to make sure I'm taking eliminately any potential dangers to my unborn baby, like certain meds) or what birth control am I using (am I aware of the side effects). IMO, I just don't see how an ob that's doing a thorough job wouldn't be able to figure out my sexual orientation.

 

[Passions71203]

an obgyn in our town asks you on the little info paper you fill out
Are you Straight?
If you have ever had "different" types of Sex?
If you are in a commited relationship?
How many partners have you had?

 

[NYBlue1]

and on the flip side, its discrimination to force a doctor into treating a patient who violates his religious beliefs which he is legally protected from exercising under the Constitution.

I guess my biggest issue with this whole thing is ultimately it boils down to a lesbian couple having a baby, and really whatever that doesn't bother me...what bothers me is its being successfully turned into a way to "push" an agenda. I support equal "rights" for gay couples...I do not support having an agenda shoved down my throat that if you have a religious or moral objection to homosexuality that you are a bigot...which has been stated several times in this thread. I'm a live and let live kind of person and what happens in your bedroom is your business...it doesn't need to be splashed all over the place as front page news (something this couple sought out by granting interviews and making media deals) and you do not need to force people to accept your lifestyle if you are unwilling to accept theirs.

Heres a little nugget of info for you I think you may find usefull, there is NO agenda, unless being treated like every other american, loving our country , paying our taxes and excepting equal treatment is an agenda...is that an agenda? To want to be treated like every other american?

I dont want to ram myself or my family down anybodies throats, I want to live my life, this couple told a story to a Gay publication, a very well respected one at that, its not the star or enquirer or one that is in the position to pay to the higest bidder.

A person that finds homosexuality morally or religiously objectable ?then its good they are not homosexual. Other than that how in the world does that effect you or your life if a person is a homosexual? It doesnt.

Jesus said let no man judge his fellow man, thats Gods job. If you are objecting to homosexuals but dont do anything other than object to them you are being judgemental. If you act on that judgement, you are being a judgemental bigot.( you meaning in general not you specifically)

So no just objecting to homosexuals is does not make you a bigot. I does, however,go against Gods teachings in the bible.

When will we as a country learn to respect all our brothers and sisters, I hope in my childrens lifetime.