Potty training & a toddler: advice needed

[jcemom]

My DD, 20 months old, has for the last week or so been *sort of* wanting to use the potty. We have not started potty training so to speak. I've told her what her potty is for, and she's seen me use the "big potty" but I haven't tried to sit her on it or anything like that. About a week ago she came running to me naked (she likes to take off her clothes now) saying "potty, potty" and lo and behold, when I went to see what all the commotion was about, she had used her potty! I wasn't sure what to do, so we said "yay," clapped, and I let her flush the toilet.

Fast forward to now. She pretty much refuses to wear her diaper while awake. I even went to get her up from her nap a couple of days ago and she had removed her diaper and, of course, wet her crib while sleeping. (Since then I've been keeping a onsie on her at night because she can't get those off yet.) I'm not sure what to do. As far as the potty goes, she uses it about half the time, and the other half she goes on the floor. She prefers to be naked, but will wear a shirt or a dress, but no diaper or panties or anything on the bottom half. If I put pants over her diaper she will sometimes leave them on, but I guess I'm thinking I should be encouraging use of the potty and I can't remove her pants and a diaper quick enough when she says "potty." (She doesn't give much notice, lol. If she has no diaper on she just goes on her own and tells me afterwards.)

What to do? I don't even know how to go about potty training. I fought my older son for six months before giving up on him (at almost 3 1/2) and then he started going on his own and never had an accident after that. Obviously I wasn't doing it right that time. My younger son (by a year) copied his brother and was also going within weeks with no training from me. So I don't know how to go about this. DH thinks DD is just too young and that I should keep a diaper and pants on her to avoid cleaning up messes (we have hardwood floors, so for the most part it really isn't much trouble). I'm thinking if she wants to go I shouldn't discourage it, but not sure how to go about encouraging her.

Sorry this got so long, but can anyone help? Any advice/tips? TIA

 

[oogieboogie]

I don't know about others' experience but this is what worked for me both kids:

when DS didn't want to wear his diaper anymore, we just let him loose and put underwear on him. Instead of waiting for accidents, we made him go potty every hour/2 hours. We also made him go right after waking up, and right before bed. We didn't give him anything but water at night and nothing 1 hour before bedtime. By a week he was fully trained.

We did the same thing for our second DS, only he took longer cause he would never tell us if he needed to go. But eventually we got them all trained. DS6 at 21 months, and DS3 at 27 months.

The one thing I never did was put them on pull-ups. That's a big no-no for us. Also, accidents are bound to happen during this time, so don't yell or get angry at the kid. It also helps to see Mommy or Daddy doing the deed.

Good luck!

 

[Jenn Lynn]

I agree with the no pull-ups. We used them with DD and I think that was a big mistake.

I would follow OogieBoogie's advice. Put her in panties and take her to the potty-a lot! Buy some with her favorite characters on them.

And don't make a big deal out of it if she goes on the floor. Just repeat that we need to pee in the potty. And maybe show her/have her sit on it.

Does your DD like stickers? We used stickers as a reward for potty training and DD loved it.

 

[mrsv98]

I second or maybe third, the no pull ups. I think they added 6 months onto my DD's training, they are just too comfortable.

Leave her in undies or naked and let her go. At least it is summer so her little tush won't freeze!

You can also try a little reward, my Ped always said a little bribe never hurt anyone. Good luck, DD wasn't trained until she was 3 and I finally said enough!

 

[shortbun]

Can you stay outside a lot and reward her for letting you
know she needs to go - put the rewards at the potty so
she only gets them IF she goes in the potty.
Is your house fully carpeted? I'd handle things differently
if so. Does she have a spot where she typically likes to "go?"
If she does, put the potty there. Get two pottys and put
them in easy spots and once she gets it-move them little
by little til they are in the bathroom.
Good luck. She really wants to be a big girl but needs lots
of help.
mimi

 

[jcemom]

Thank you!

oogieboogie, I followed your advice last night, she did go potty before bed, no drinks at bedtime, she woke up dry so I figured she would need to go ASAP and sure enough she did! I also told DH that yours were going potty at this age, so it's not unusual. (He was thinking she SHOULD be 3 like DS was.)

Jenn Lynn, I gave her a sticker this morning and she's wearing it proudly, lol. I wouldn't have thought of that!

mrsv98,

At least it is summer so her little tush won't freeze!

Ha! It's been pretty hot here, unusually hot, for the past month. Definitely no freezing! My MIL was just telling me she had pull-ups left over from my neice (who incidentally wasn't trained until 3 1/2) and she would bring them over! I'll be sure to tell her no thanks, we'll try without them!

shortbun, I will go move the stickers near the potty right now, lol. We have hardwood floors so accidents are easy to clean up. I've gotten the impression that when she has an accident it's just because she didn't think of going, or she didn't make it that far. I never thought of two potties, maybe we'll try that!

I'm not sure I WANT my little baby princess to grow up! Before I know it she'll be wanting to borrow my car!

 

[Duchie]

I also have 3 children, and my youngest was potty trained by the time he was 32 months old. I think it's because they see the older ones going in the potty and want to be like them.

I think the biggest trick with my youngest was that I let him have accidents. I bought those awful training pants (the ones with the really thick "absorbent layers" and put those on him EXCLUSIVELY - I never went back to diapers. He learned pretty quickly how uncomfortable being wet was, and realized his older siblings were not ever wet, so it must be wrong. It took him maybe a week to catch on. With the older two I didn't want to push them, so when they had accidents I would back off of potty training telling them it was OK and we'd try again the next day. Now THAT's a lesson in what NOT to do.

I also know that with 3, it was REALLY difficult to remember to take him to the potty every hour and a half or so. So I had to set a timer to remind myself.

And no, she's not too young at all. My mom swears we were all potty trained by the time we were 18 months old. I think it has something to do with cloth vs. disposable diapers. If I had to use cloth (the only thing available back then), I'd have my kids out of diapers pretty darn quick, too. And disposables keep babies so much drier - good for preventing diaper rash, bad for letting them know how uncomfortable being wet is.

 

[bananiem]

Well, as for her being too young- when I worked at a child care center the state guidelines were that the kids had to be potty trained (or at least no diapers) by 33 months old to move to the next class. They couldn't stay in the toddler room after that. (We did make exceptions occassionally, but the majority of kids were trained-at least at the center with regularly scheduled potty times.)
If she seems interested I'd do everything to encourage it. My dd showed interest at about 20 months. I didn't encourage it because I was 8 months pregnant and I figured she'd regress anyway. BIG MISTAKE!!! She was finally trained around 30 months.
I agree with using the cloth training pants. The contain most of the mess but are still uncomfortable. This is also one time when I believe in bribery!! Use stickers, m &m's, whatever works!
Good luck!

 

[jcemom]

Thank you, I think I'll go look for the cloth training pants and then we'll move up to the "big girl panties" when she isn't having accidents. I must say that it is going well so far today. I just put her in bed for her nap and we didn't have any accidents this morning. She just looks too funny running around the house with her tiny bare bottom sticking out, lol. (DH is still saying she is too small to go potty, though as far as size is concerned she is tiny for her age, so she does look really small.)

 

[oogieboogie]

DS6 was running around nekid in the middle of winter - in NE Ohio no less!

Boy did our heating bill shoot way up! The things we do for the sake of potty training!

 

[Claudia1]

DGD is 22 months and is ready to be trained, too. I was wondering if this was too early byt she sees it in Daycare and know exactly what to do. She is proudly wearing a stamp on her hand (washes off easily, ready to replace the next time she goes) from going in the potty today.

For the last month, the cheers anybody in our family who goes into the bathroom and announces that they just went potty when they come out. It is a hoot! We tell her just to get her reaction!