Post your funniest story from a Disney Cruise!

[kaykels]

I'll bring the video with us to your house in, uhm, only 29 more days. Yipeee.
It's a RIOT. We re-wound it a hundred times laughing every time.

 

[DVC Mary]

DS son 9 at the time & I were snorkeling at CC. We were almost at the far edge of the snorkeling lagoon, when my son starts whacking me & tugging at me. I pop my head out of the water & say "What?"

He asks w/ alarm: "Mom why are you chasing after that big long silver fish w/ all the teeth?!"

So of course I stick my head back down & find myself face to face w/ the famous "Barry the barracuda"

I start swimming like heck in the other direction.

I can see fairly well w/o my glasses, but apparently while I was swimming after a school of fish that I saw, so was "Barry." I didn't know about "Barry" or that he was harmless until I talked to one of the lifeguards & wrote about him on these boards.

Don't ask me why I could see a whole bunch of little but missed a big long silver one w/ "all the teeth."

 

[PizzieDuster]

I video taped my kids in the Mickey pool. I didn't catch this until I watched the video back at home, but in the background, there was a big Pooh sized guy getting out of the pool with more than a little plumber crack showing !!

Doesn't he know "Crack is whack"?

The first Match your Mate show was the funniest thing I have ever seen on all my cruises. But...it was the side show that was so entertaining we still talk about it.

There was a couple who was in front trying to do everything they could to get picked. They were dirty dancing, being very liberal and outrageous and the emcee called them up with two other couples. The audience had to pick by applause which one to make it. I'm sure this was the "middle couple" no the newlyweds, etc. So they just start going at it but unfortunately were not picked.

The woman gets so upset - along with her party. She takes off to the bar and her DH had to go talk to her along with other members in her party. Now I'm all but so involved with this side show, I hardly can watch the real Match Your Mate! So they leave her alone. Now they were there so early (it was obviously very important for her to be picked) they were sitting in the front. We are sitting behind her group. She comes back to her seat, during the show, turns it around so her back faces the contestents, crosses her arms and puts on the best show! She's basically looking at DH and I just ignoring the entire show going on 4 feet from her back! She's so pissed off! Rolling her eyes, giving the finger, making her self throw up. I was lmao! I couldn't watch the game ---- She was a much better show! Guess which couple won...... you got it. She stormed out and the best thing is - her whole party stayed and had a great time and we all started dancing after the show. Her DH was dancing alone.

She was a great show! She must have really wanted to be a contestent really bad ya think?

 

[AQW]

I think this is my favorite DIS thread ever - I've got tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard! Kudos to the OP, thanks to everyone for sharing, and keep those stories coming!!!

 

[alwayslisad]

I will join in

In 2006 my siblings and I decided to do a Family Cruise. Dsis and her family / Dbro and his wife and my family - total group was 11 ppl.

Dbro has a slight drinking issue and most days he could be found stumbling around the deck looking for his beer. Dsis-in-law basically ignores him. It is a tad sad but that is their life and they accept it - so be it.

Anyway - during this cruise we experienced rough sea's. I did not mind since it was NOT overly bad - but one morning all of us Adults were sitting in the cove. DH was in the hot tub - Dsis was reading - Dsis-in-law was sitting on the other side of the pool sunning herself and I was sitting in the pool area - you know where you can wet your bottom but not the WHOLE body! It is about 10:00am and most of us are drinking coffee or juice. Many people are sitting on the ledge as well. Dbro see's me sitting and yells "LISA......LISA...Don't MOVE...I am on my way over to see you" he proceeds to climb INTO the pool area and start WALKING toward me - across the DANG POOL - so I yell "STOP - you are going to walk straight into the Pool" so he stops and walks around to where I am sitting. Many people sitting there are trying to stifle a laugh. He finally staggers over to me and flops down ( like a rag doll ) but does NOT spill a drop of the beer he is carrying !) and announces in a very VERY loud VOICE....

Him: I finally figured out what is wrong
Me: With what
Him: The boat
Me: there is a problem with the boat?
Him: Yes --- watch (and he points to the water in the pool)
Me: what am I supposed to be watching (by now everyone is watching)
Him: Here it comes - LOOOOOOOK and he points to the pool
Me: Is it an animal? or what?
Him: PAY ATTENTION !!! here it comes again
Me: hmmmm ok
Him: HERE IT COMES AGAIN - GET READY - SEE SEE SEE
Me: I DON'T SEE ANYTHING ( and neither does the 10 other people looking)
Him: ok just watch I will point it out to you
Me: OK
Him: HERE it comes - see - the boat is broken
ME: I NEED A DRINK
Him: Want a beer?
ME: NOOOOOOOOOOOo
Him: Ok since you are not seeing what I am seeing let me tell you what is wrong ---- the boat is broken---- before they put us in the water they should have LEVELED the Boat....
me: HUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH? ? ? ?
Him: Well after we all got on the boat - they should have made sure the boat was level and then we should have departed...
Me: I am totally lost with what you are saying - and so is your audience
( pointing to all the other people listening )
Him: Watch closely you will see that the boat is tipping side to side....
Me: ( finally catching on to what he is talking about ) YOU TOTAL IDIOT - the boat is rocking cus we are on the water and those are called WAVES that make the boat move !!!!!! ( I got up and shook my head and walked away ) the roar of hysterical people at the Adult cove was deafening!!!!

 

[dredick]

that's sooo funny, I can see the other people watching this happen. Side Note...Maybe AA?

 

[MousseauMob]

Me: ( finally catching on to what he is talking about ) YOU TOTAL IDIOT - the boat is rocking cus we are on the water and those are called WAVES that make the boat move !!!!!! ( I got up and shook my head and walked away ) the roar of hysterical people at the Adult cove was deafening!!!!

Well there goes my coffee spewed all over my keyboard!

 

[CastleCreations]

We were docked at CC and I put sunblock on my kids before we left the ship. By the time we got off of the tram car to the beach my DD was screaming because the sunblock was burning her face and eyes. She was allergic to this brand. I had to take her to the medical pavillion where they flushed out her eyes and gave her some Benedryl.

About 30 minutes later she decided to go snorkeling with DH. She was SO EXCITED to do this, it was all she talked about.
We were set up far down the beach, so the Mickey statue was a good distance. She's a very strong swimmer, but they got half way out and the Benedryl kicked in. I looked in the distance down the beach and saw my DH swimming with a 9 year old on his back. He said it was the longest swim of his life, swimming with a 65 pound kid on his back! They BOTH crashed out in a chair for about hour after that.
But he has fond memories of catching a 9 year old mermaid when he was snorkeling at CC.

My daughter also had the sunblock that burned her face.. so for the first "family" picture by the ship, her face is all pinched up and the tears are streaming down her face...

 

[DWeaver]

Him: Watch closely you will see that the boat is tipping side to side....
Me: ( finally catching on to what he is talking about ) YOU TOTAL IDIOT - the boat is rocking cus we are on the water and those are called WAVES that make the boat move !!!!!! ( I got up and shook my head and walked away ) the roar of hysterical people at the Adult cove was deafening!!!!

That was too funny! I had tears streaming down my face that was so funny!

 

[TiszBear]

These are so funny, With some of these stories I can picture my family.

Thank you all for making my day this week.

Jennifer

 

[Luckymomoftwo]

Ok, so I've been trying to think of my funniest cruise moment to post on here. I finally remembered something that my DH may strangle me for posting, but here goes.

We had joining rooms with some friends and somebody hadn't shut the door (that joins the rooms) all the way. DH had just gotten out of the shower and our friend in the other room was videotaping so that she could show her family what the staterooms look like. Somehow as she was videotaping, she caught some footage of MY DH as he was getting out of the shower. Needless to say, she won't be showing THAT portion of her video to her family.

But wait there's more! This same friend was getting dressed in HER stateroom, and my DH went to open that same (joining) door to tell them something and he saw more than he wanted to!

Thank GOD I'm not the jealous type!!! AND Thank GOD her DH and I didn't have that same bad luck of catching each other in our birthday suits!

 

[DisneyCruiseFansMc]

While I'm sure my story won't even compare to some of these, I'd feel left out if I didn't get in on the fun. On our 2006 cruise, we went on a beach excursion in Costa Maya. The "short, scenic 30 minute drive to the beach" entailed a crazy bus driver taking our lives in our hands on these very narrow, dirt roads in the middle of NOWHERE, swamp on one side, swamp on the other. After a harrowing trip, low & behold we find ourselves at a very nice resort for the day. So everyone is good & happy after a fun day at the beach, I ask the usual "Mom question"....."Does anyone have to use the restroom before we leave?", "No,Mom".OK, 'nuff said. So back on the bus of death we go. About 10 minutes into the trip wouldn't you know it, my DD (9 at the time) says "I have to go to the bathroom", "try to hold it"....bump,bump, speeding along, nope, she can't hold it. So my DH goes up to the kamikazee bus driver & asks if he can pull over so she can go to the bathroom. I guess weighing the option of staying on his very tight schedule or cleaning a mess on the bus & anticipating the $20. tip my DH gave him, he pulled over. So my DD uses the side of the road & DH's tshirt to get some much needed relief. All I can say is good thing Costa Maya has a public pool & showers on the dock!!! So that's my story.....& I'm sticking to it!!!

 

[kaykels]

I can certainly relate to the swampy, dirty, scary roads of Costa Maya.
We were afraid to get out of the car until we saw the beach.
Then my son was stung multiple times by jelly fish. The guy that rented that area of the beach where we reserved our chairs went and got the first aid kit. It was about 20 years old and contained a bandaid and cotton ball.
But the drunk Mexican guy next door offered to pee on my 5 year old.
And who said they aren't hospitable?

 

[disneyfool_1202]

But the drunk Mexican guy next door offered to pee on my 5 year old.
And who said they aren't hospitable?

 

[MousseauMob]

But the drunk Mexican guy next door offered to pee on my 5 year old.
And who said they aren't hospitable?

Oh great, this time Diet Coke has been spewed all over the keyboard. when will I learn not to eat or drink anything while reading this thread.

 

[dredick]

But the drunk Mexican guy next door offered to pee on my 5 year old.
And who said they aren't hospitable?

OK, that is the best line on this thread!!

 

[alwayslisad]

Oh great, this time Diet Coke has been spewed all over the keyboard. when will I learn not to eat or drink anything while reading this thread.

Well maybe you could have offered to spew your coffee and Diet coke all over him - probably SAFER than the original offer....

SHEESh the idea of that HOLY MOLY!!! nice offer though.... did you all seek a therapist?????

oh and by the way - my dear brother still tells people that the boat is not level - and that is why he won't CRUISE on the Disney Cruise Lines again! YAHOO YAHOO YAHOOO I am thankful that they don't level the boat --- oooohhh wait maybe he can get a job on a beach after jellyfish sting....he could make a mint after all that beer he drinks!!

 

[ibouncetoo]

But the drunk Mexican guy next door offered to pee on my 5 year old.
And who said they aren't hospitable?

Well, how nice of him to offer!

Actually, it IS an option in an emergency situation....however it's probably best if:

The old-fashioned cure for a jellyfish sting is one's own urine since it contains plenty of ammonia.

.

 

[kaykels]

DREDICK THAT GRAPHIC IS HYSTERICAL l!!!
Where did you find a smily face that pees ???

 

[HillPete]

OK, this is kinda hard to explain, just try to imagine you were me...

On our cruise, my then-6-year-old son insisted on hopping over the metal plates in the floor (where the ship was welded together, I think) every time we walked down the hallway. My then-4-year-old son insisted on saying hello to every vacuum cleaner he saw (they had eyes and a smile and the name Henry on them).

OK, so we're walking down the hall to our room one night and my big one is in the lead doing his walk, walk, walk, hop routine and the little one is saying 'Hi, Henry' every 20 feet, when suddenly he says (in a high, squeaky voice that vacuum cleaners apparantly have) 'Hi, Matthew!' He then does a huge, head-thrashing, whole body double take and says to me (in his regular voice), 'Mommy, how did that Henry know my name?'

DH and I nearly wet ourselves...

--H