So, after I posted I went to take a shower, and here's what happened. To understand this story, you need to know that I am very very nearsighted, pretty much blind as a bat without my glasses.
So, I've had my shower, and I'm dry and getting dressed. I had left my jeans on the stack of towels next to the shower. I grab them and pull them on. I feel something prickly in the region of my right butt cheek. I reach my hand in there to get whatever it is. The mystery thing eludes my grasp and falls towards my crotch. I pursue, touching whatever it is several times before I finally get it in my hand and pull it out. Since I don't have my glasses on yet, I have to put it up roughly one inch from my eyes to see what it is.
It's a giant, live cockroach.
I screamed to wake the dead and flung the monster away from me. Hubby, who had the bad luck to still be home, comes running as fast as he can from the other end of the house. He has never heard a sound quite like that from me in 23 years of marriage, he tells me.
He searches around and finds the roach, which is not quite dead but definitely stunned after his rapid journey from my hand to the floor. Hubby sends him to a watery grave.
I am still a little weak in the knees.
This is me pouting. I am also going to stomp my feet and throw a big ole tantrum. Not only am I missing out on meeting everyone, and going to Disney, and not eating at 50's.....now I am going to miss out on nakey Bomb!
not this:
.
She will be scarred for life and may end up with permanent brain damage. 
Look everybody, Litebrite's back!!!!
