Pity Party, Table for One

[Trixie15]

I have to vent. Can I do that here?

My extended family is going on a WDW trip in May and it is turning out absolutley nothing like we had thought. It's going to be ok, I know we will all still have fun, but I feel like I'm in mourning or something for the vacation that I've lost.

I am feeling a desperate desire to book another trip shortly afterwards and make it all the way we usually like it. But finances prohibit that from happening, so I need to just let it go. Sigh.

Tell me it will be ok!!

 

[design_mom]

I'm so sorry. I hope that, whatever happens, you have some wonderful memories from this trip, even if they aren't exactly what you intended.

 

[kimmylaj]

it will be okay, parts of it will be better, parts will be worse but its still disney and thats what matters, (this is speaking from experience with a group of 16)

 

[mrstomrice]

I have to vent. Can I do that here?

My extended family is going on a WDW trip in May and it is turning out absolutley nothing like we had thought. It's going to be ok, I know we will all still have fun, but I feel like I'm in mourning or something for the vacation that I've lost.

I am feeling a desperate desire to book another trip shortly afterwards and make it all the way we usually like it. But finances prohibit that from happening, so I need to just let it go. Sigh.

Tell me it will be ok!!

Try to book some time for just your family. All of the family members will realize that everyone will be happier this way. Any chance of extending this trip by a day or 2 to enjoy it more?

 

[2cutekidz]

I agree - you don't have to spend the whole trip with your extended family. You can always plan on being in the same parks on the same days, or try to do your ADR's together then go off on your own.

 

[Trixie15]

Try to book some time for just your family. All of the family members will realize that everyone will be happier this way. Any chance of extending this trip by a day or 2 to enjoy it more?

That was our original plan! Everyone else was leaving on Saturday and we were going to stay till Wednesday. But then ... the military ticket deal came out and it was only good for 5 days. And the savings was significant, so we decided to just do the 5 day tickets and leave on Saturday like the others.

I am sad that we're not staying on property. I'm sad that we're driving to the parks every day. I'm super bummed about not getting to use the dining plan. And I'm really not thrilled that my family has NO interest in dining at the restaurants at the world. That is one thing we are doing regardless - I have a list of restaurants that we are going to try no matter what, but part of me feels really guilty to be spending that money and leaving the other family out.

 

[Trixie15]

I agree - you don't have to spend the whole trip with your extended family. You can always plan on being in the same parks on the same days, or try to do your ADR's together then go off on your own.

Yes, this was our thought too. But the fact is, we see my brother about once every 3 years, so I just don't think wandering off to do our own thing is going to be very polite. The point of this trip is supposed to be to have a family vacation where the kids can see their cousins (my youngest neice will be almost 3 and I haven't seen her since she was 2 weeks old.)

I know it will be ok, I'm just feeling a little remorseful, kwim? I am stubborn and I want to do things my way and I'm having to step back a little on this trip and it's hard for me.

Thanks for listening.

 

[smidgen21]

I have to vent. Can I do that here?

My extended family is going on a WDW trip in May and it is turning out absolutley nothing like we had thought. It's going to be ok, I know we will all still have fun, but I feel like I'm in mourning or something for the vacation that I've lost.

I am feeling a desperate desire to book another trip shortly afterwards and make it all the way we usually like it. But finances prohibit that from happening, so I need to just let it go. Sigh.

Tell me it will be ok!!

i haven't read through all the posts, but perhaps you could arrive a few days early to enjoy the World before they get there?

 

[bumbershoot]

But then ... the military ticket deal came out and it was only good for 5 days. And the savings was significant, so we decided to just do the 5 day tickets and leave on Saturday like the others.

I just read that they are not-upgradable.

But if they were only $99 (per the thread on it on the Theme Parks board), getting a 2 day ticket would still be less expensive than a 7 day ticket that you originally thought about getting, yes? (just looked it up...found it's around 100 less per adult than a 7 day; by adding a 2 day and the $99).

Snag a value room for a couple nights...

Would be less expensive than getting home and realize that you will now move heaven and earth to get another trip in soon...

 

[lmillercrew]

That was our original plan! Everyone else was leaving on Saturday and we were going to stay till Wednesday. But then ... the military ticket deal came out and it was only good for 5 days. And the savings was significant, so we decided to just do the 5 day tickets and leave on Saturday like the others.

I am sad that we're not staying on property. I'm sad that we're driving to the parks every day. I'm super bummed about not getting to use the dining plan. And I'm really not thrilled that my family has NO interest in dining at the restaurants at the world. That is one thing we are doing regardless - I have a list of restaurants that we are going to try no matter what, but part of me feels really guilty to be spending that money and leaving the other family out.

You should not feel guilty about enjoying a vacation with your family!!! If the others choose not to eat on property, that's their choice. They can meet up with you later. DON'T feel guilty. Go and do your thing, and everyone else will do theirs.

 

[999happyhaunts]

I have been on 4 trips with immediate family and extended family and my mom is the only one I will ever travel with again. The only advice I can give you is to be firm in your plans to do some of the things seperate. Book some of those meals you want to eat, and if they don't want to eat there, hey that will be just fine, go without them. If you don't split up some of the time you will want to rip yours or their head off. Its usually too many people with different expectations of their vacation. Just relax and try to enjoy.

Shea

 

[esk]

Well, is Sea World offering their free military deal? you could take a day and go there, thus preserving one of your 5 Disney Days.

Disney is also offering 40% off rooms for military; I'd extend a few days and do that.

For example -- we didn't use our passes the first and last days; we went to Downtown Disney the first day and ate, then went to the Boardwalk the last day and ate....so we were still at Disney but not using our passes in the parks.

Good luck -- we did an extended vacation a few years ago and it was OK....but we're out the door by 8 am and my brother's family couldn't get moving before 10:30, so we just used cell phones and met up for some rides and lunch. Then they wanted to do this park and we didn't so we just met up for dinner. They didn't want to do a character meal so we split the second day, you know? We did swim at the pool together and watch fireworks together and eat at Boma together (to look at animals) but we certainly didn't spend 24/7, there is no way.

 

[Trixie15]

I just read that they are not-upgradable.

But if they were only $99 (per the thread on it on the Theme Parks board), getting a 2 day ticket would still be less expensive than a 7 day ticket that you originally thought about getting, yes? (just looked it up...found it's around 100 less per adult than a 7 day; by adding a 2 day and the $99).

Snag a value room for a couple nights...

Would be less expensive than getting home and realize that you will now move heaven and earth to get another trip in soon...

We were getting a 10 day ticket before we changed our minds. There are 6 of us, so snagging a value room just doesn't work - we'd have to get 2 rooms to fit us all, or stay at POR since Matthew is a baby and doesn't count yet.

Trust me, I crunched a lot of numbers. In the end, we are saving almost $1500 by leaving on Saturday, by the time you add in the restaurants we won't be eating at, the parking fees we won't be spending, 5 days of extra tickets for 5 people, etc. It's significant.

My brother and my dad are the ones who are military. We were able to get companion tickets from them.

It's ok. I know it will still be fun. I just need to get over it so that I'm ready for this kind of fun, kwim?

 

[mousefanmichelle]

Good luck! I know how you feel. My trip in May went from being me, my kids and my sister with her 1 son to all of my sisters kids, their spouses and their children - total of 16 of us now. I went from staying at the Poly to staying at POP because my sister is paying for this trip for her family and she can't afford the Poly for all 10 of them. Now they want to rent a car because they want to do other things... on and on.... it goes.... All I keep thinking is this is my vacation too darn it and I'm gonna do what I want to do. Well sometimes we know that doesn't happen - so I am in mourning kinda too!!!

 

[arielsleepingbeauty]

It's hard when yu go with people that do not do things the way you would. I would try to make the best of it, you will be at WDW anyway. I wouldn definatley try to make time for just your immediate family each day.

This is the reason that I will only go with my sister and mother. We all have the same thinking and we know it's ok to do what we want even if the other doesn't.

I went several times without DH and now my DBF. I have to do it my way or it just isn't worth it.

I hope that you do end up having a wonderful time.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

At least you'll be in WDW. I'm sure you'll have a great time.

 

[TheLittleRoo]

This post just underscores my belief that the ONLY vacation I will take with extended family is a cruise. You are all together on the same boat, eating in the same dining room, going to the same place every day.

I would not dream of going with extended family on either side to Disney. We did it last year with my inlaws, and it was miserable. My husband acted like a different person, I hated having to cede part of my vacation to others after we'd planned for so long and spent so much money.

I could do a cruise or a visit to their hometown to see them before I could include sibs and parents on my family trip to see the Mouse. I have a hard time planning for my family of 5, much less 15 other adults and kids!

OP, you have my sympathies. Personally, I would develop my plan of action now, down to the parks each day, the itinerary, lunch, dinner, etc. Share this with everyone, ask them to see which days line up with their plans. Make sure they know in advance you plan to carve out some time just for your family time. You will go crazy if you try to spend every minute of every day together. It will get progressively harder each day to hold your tongue and not bite anyone's head off if you can't decompress with your little family.

Good luck!

 

[LuvBaloo]

Is the extended family experienced WDW travellers? or will they be newbies? Will they follow you around and do what you want? or can you just agree to meet at certain times? Are you all trying to go to the parks in one vehicle or will you at least have your own vehicle?

If you are sharing one vehicle, then there may be friction about when to go to&from parks or even which park to go to. Can you look at the schedule and plan which park for which day.

I've travelled with family, and the biggest thing I've learned, is you can waste a ton of time trying to reach agreement on what to do. Sometimes, you just have to separate and go do different things. The restaurants are important to you, so enjoy them. Sometimes extra people can work out and make it easy for you to go do something that DH isn't really interested in.

I understand what you mean about mourning the loss of your trip. You had one trip planned (even if only in your mind) and its changed. It sounds like you were just needing to vent as you adjust your mind to the new reality.

wishing you a good (even if different) trip than you were expecting. And be prepared to get annoyed with people. You may want to have a key phrase with your DH to let each other know when one of you is getting too frustrated, so the other one can step it up. Make it something you can easily drop into conversant. For example "red", you are getting sick of the current round of "what should we do next - I don't know - what do you want to do" so all of a sudden you look around "gee I really like the lady's red top.

Sorry for the long post. One other suggestion. If somebody says what do you want to do, answer quickly and honestly, then say sound good everybody? wait 2 sec, and then say okay lets go.