Personal Space, NOT!!!

[darlingdeb]

I was not sure exactly where to post this... I am a bit perturbed about an issue that has been brought to my attention here on the boards. I didn't really get it until it happened to me. It is not an across the board comment about certain groups of people but I really don't understand people's lack of understanding about personal space. I am a very polite thoughtful person but when it comes to my personal space, don't get in it. I sat for 1 1/4 hour waiting for the parade An adult man, with his family, came and sat down pretty much on my thigh. He had to squeeze in!! My dirty looks apparently made them move over a bit. If you would like me to make room for your kid, you will have to ask me nicely, not sit on me! I thoroughly enjoyed the parade and once it was over the wife came up to me and gave me a what not and was yelling at me! You are such an angry person, why did you treat us this way? HELLO- ask me nicely and I may help you. It really upset me that this women had the nerve to yell at me.

Next day I was getting coffee at a booth and the same kind of thing happened again, two teenagers were
leaning on me. I lost it and told them to get off me.

Maybe I am not tolerant, but I think that this is just common sense in America. If this happens again I guess I need to tell them that if they ask nicely that I would be glad to help them.

 

[ravenclawtrekkie]

A few years ago, I was on one of the buses and a complete stranger sat their young child on my lap. I'm still confused about that one, to be honest.

 

[choover2576]

A few years ago, I was on one of the buses and a complete stranger sat their young child on my lap. I'm still confused about that one, to be honest.

Oh my goodness! What the heck??!! What did you say?

I think that tops the story I heard. It might have been from one of our fellow DISers or maybe I heard it on our trip. A family was in a teacup and someone decided to hop in with them. That must have been a pretty awkward ride.

I agree with the OP. I very similar thing happened to us at the FOF parade and we also commented on the lack of consideration for personal space.

I wonder if anyone has any strategies for those who encroach on our "bubble" as we explain to our kids?

 

[ravenclawtrekkie]

Oh my goodness! What the heck??!! What did you say?

I told the adult with the child that I wasn't comfortable with strange children sitting on me. I'm not sure she entirely understood English but she did put the kid on her own lap instead.

 

[minnie mum]

1. Everyone has their own definition of what constitutes 'personal' space. And I think you will find that this varies just as much amongst Americans as it does between nationalities.

2. WDW parks are crowded. And crowds are even worse for parades, fireworks and other live performances. You can't cram 10,000 people into a small area and hope to maintain any semblance of 'personal' space.

If this isnt something that you can handle, then perhaps WDW isn't a good place for you. Instead of glaring and dirty looks, or yelling at the person beside or behind you, how about a more civil response? A simple, and polite, request that they please move further back might work equally well, or better. Bad manners should not beget bad manners.

 

[Mr & Mrs DD]

A lot of people are just rude and self entitled these days. I was brought up better then that. We got a spot to watch the MNSS Halloween parade. We had stood in our spot right on the curb for about an hour and a half before the parade was to start. 4 young adults (18 to 20 years old I would guess) came and stood behind us. One of them tapped me on the shoulder and had the nerve to ask if they could have our spot up front. I very politely told her "No" and that we had been standing there for over an hour and we really didn't want to give up our spots. I then heard her say to her friends "How rude." I'm rude because I told her "No"? It sounds like she has not been told "No" enough in her life. What is wrong with people? Rude, self absorbed & entitled.

 

[Tia1977]

This happened to us last June. Same scenario, waiting for a SW parade at HS curb side. When we arrived in that spot, a cute younger couple was there next to us. The girl was a CM on her day off there to take pics of the parade. We were chatting it up with them for about an hour. 10 mins before start time a tall man pushed himself (literally) and his two kids up through the crowd behind us, then pushed past us until they were standing in the street. When a CM came by to instruct they needed to back up out of the street, they squished backwards until we finally had to move back, and they ended up on the curb with us now second row behind them. My DD even had to stand up and get behind those two kids bc one had squished so close to her; she was sitting on her leg! At first we were too shocked to say anything, then when my DH did go to say something; the guy spoke a diff language and (at least pretended) he didn't understand English. To avoid causing a tense scene in front of the kids, we let it go. And the poor CM who had been waiting forever to take pics was now stuck behind this tall guy. We felt so bad for her, we rearranged so that she had an unobstructed view again. I understand that dealing with crowds in unavoidable, and I also understand that English speaking countries have our own share of rude people. However, why is it that almost everyone who frequents the parks knows exactly what "group" of people who are by far generally the rudest and most invasive of body space? Every time this topic comes up among the Disney enthusiasts we know, it never takes long for it to come out.

 

[Donna M]

I do believe the country of origin plays a role to a point. Have you seen pictures in Japan and how they squish the passengers into the trains? Some people grow up with a different sense of personal space than we do. I don't like to be squished and will avoid putting myself into that if I can help it, but parades are a problem, especially when "entitled" folk come along. There isn't too much one can do if you don't want to cause a scene and politeness didn't work.

 

[Barbydoll8]

I agree that it's part cultural. I've witnessed people from all walks doing this but it does seem to me that it is typically younger people (under 20) or non-Americans. I have no issue (and neither does DH) to loudly tell people no because we staked our spots out well in advance and they should have too if they wanted an up front spot.
We only ever let children in front of us at parades etc.

 

[Lyricallie]

I was once with my family and a young girl and her friends (I'm sure you can guess what kind of group in July) came and screamed, and I mean screamed in my ear. I'm Glaswegian (so we're a scary bunch ) and I turned round and did like a stop signal with my hand then told her very plainly to stop screaming. It was so bizarre. I think I was a bit stunned more than anything else. That's the only real issue I've had with crowding.

 

[PirateSAM]

Here at The World now and this is happening right and left. It's crowded, but I don't like strangers touching me either. Cultural? Whatever happened to when in Rome...?
The young adults with backbacks the likes of The Amazing Racers really get me! Not one person who's wacked me with it has ever apologized. Is it really necessary to pack everything you own for a day in the parks?

 

[jaiminee krikit]

A few years ago when I was in line for the Jungle Cruise, a woman behind me kept pushing against me with her stomach. Seriously. It's 100+ degrees out, I don't feel like cuddling! Well, my daughter and I were looking at one of the scenes in the queue and the line in front of us had moved maybe 2 feet. The cuddler behind me started pushing me forward with her belly. I finally had enough. I turned around and asked her nicely to please not push me. She pointed at the empty space in front of us. I told her moving that extra two feet isn't going to get us to the front of the line any quicker. After that, my husband stood between us and she cuddled her belly with him.
That same year, possibly even that night, we were waiting for the MSEP to start. We had gotten our seats an hour and a half before the parade. Right before the parade was to start, I stood up to stretch my legs. My feet were still on the curb. Within seconds a woman shoved her child between my feet! The kid had to sit on my feet to sit down. I told the mother "I'm sorry, I'm sitting here". She grabbed her kid and made some rude comment and walked away. I'm sorry but if you want a good spot for the parades, you need to plan ahead. I did not sit there for almost 2 hours to save the seat for someone else. Ugh. And some people wonder why the Tomorrowland Terrace Dessert Party is so popular!

 

[DSLRuser]

i am torn on this one.

I agree, we need our personal space. But Disney is packed with 10k people. IN the castle court for example, every inch of space must be utilized. Problems arise when people try and create that "buffer" between them and the next closest person. New people see that buffer space as an opening and move to it. I can't stand it when people sit down before the fireworks, you occupy twice the space.

In lines, I will hang back and provide my family with breathing room. As was said, that extra 2 feet wont make the line move better, but will provide some fresh air.

My pet peve is people who dont control their kids. The ones who constantly sit on the chains, or hang on the rails. Or the kids who wonder up 3 families.

 

[Corey127]

A few years ago when I was in line for the Jungle Cruise, a woman behind me kept pushing against me with her stomach. Seriously. It's 100+ degrees out, I don't feel like cuddling! Well, my daughter and I were looking at one of the scenes in the queue and the line in front of us had moved maybe 2 feet. The cuddler behind me started pushing me forward with her belly. I finally had enough. I turned around and asked her nicely to please not push me. She pointed at the empty space in front of us. I told her moving that extra two feet isn't going to get us to the front of the line any quicker. After that, my husband stood between us and she cuddled her belly with him.
That same year, possibly even that night, we were waiting for the MSEP to start. We had gotten our seats an hour and a half before the parade. Right before the parade was to start, I stood up to stretch my legs. My feet were still on the curb. Within seconds a woman shoved her child between my feet! The kid had to sit on my feet to sit down. I told the mother "I'm sorry, I'm sitting here". She grabbed her kid and made some rude comment and walked away. I'm sorry but if you want a good spot for the parades, you need to plan ahead. I did not sit there for almost 2 hours to save the seat for someone else. Ugh. And some people wonder why the Tomorrowland Terrace Dessert Party is so popular!

Omg this exact thing happened to me in the Jungle Cruise line! It was 1999, I was 17, with my two sisters ages 15 and 11. My parents let us have a night in MK while they went to a nice dinner. A large man kept bumping us with his belly! Being teenagers, we were cracking up and couldn't believe it. He didn't speak English. We kept making my 11 year old sister stand behind us so his belly was hitting her and she was so mad. We still laugh to this day!

 

[PirateSAM]

i am torn on this one.

I agree, we need our personal space. But Disney is packed with 10k people. IN the castle court for example, every inch of space must be utilized. Problems arise when people try and create that "buffer" between them and the next closest person. New people see that buffer space as an opening and move to it. I can't stand it when people sit down before the fireworks, you occupy twice the space.

In lines, I will hang back and provide my family with breathing room. As was said, that extra 2 feet wont make the line move better, but will provide some fresh air.

My pet peve is people who dont control their kids. The ones who constantly sit on the chains, or hang on the rails. Or the kids who wonder up 3 families.

Second that!

Or the parents who let their children run wild in a TS restaurant. Sure, THEY get a nice quiet meal...but the rest of us have to tolerate running kids bumbling into the table or flinging their hair into our meals. Thank God for Nick, my server at Portobello the other night! He saw how ticked I was and got the kids back into the room where their parents were eating. (He got an EXTRA large tip for taking care of me.)

 

[Babydreamz]

A few years ago, I was on one of the buses and a complete stranger sat their young child on my lap. I'm still confused about that one, to be honest.

wow! what was she thinking?!?! i would never put my kid on a stranger's lap.

I'm not sure what "group" everyone is referring to, but I don't think there's a "group" at all. There are rude people everywhere and it all depends on how parents teach their children. I am constantly telling my 4 year old not to bump into people ahead of us, not to crowd other people. I can't stand when parents let their kids run wild and then my daughter asks me why the other kids get to run crazy and she has to stand and stay right next to me.

 

[UCFGrad01]

Last night at MSEP, some woman laid her head on my shoulder and put her hand on the other shoulder trying to look down Main Street to see an approaching float. Who does that?! Hands to yourself!

 

[eastendlights]

I give people two chances. If you touch, nudge, bump, step on or otherwise make physical contact with me after that, all bets are off. I have no problem telling someone to back off after they made contact three times. It is just rude and obnoxious-I manage to keep my body parts to myself and so should everyone else. When I start counting, my Dh and kids know what is coming after one, two, three.....LOL. I am not rude and screaming but firm and to the point.

 

[DisneyMomma1216]

I get it. Disney holds a lot of people. Sometimes it seems like they don't have the room, no matter where you are. I'm usually more lenient in the World, but if my personal space gets interfered with too much, I just start saying "bubble space!" ..loud enough for the person who is doing it to hear me. Yes, I stole it from a Sofia the First episode, but I don't care. It works most of the time. My husband actually starts to laugh at me, but he knows.. if someone has to make me say it, they need to back up immediately. I can't stand to feel like my space is being invaded. I know it's unavoidable at times, but still.

 

[melissa723]

Some of these stories are just making me think WHAT?!?!? I agree, Disney can be abnormally crowded at times, and like many of you, I try to be a little more giving when it comes to people entering my personal space, but some of these situations are just plain crazy, and you have every right to speak up or get upset if it happens. I think there's a difference between defending what constitutes personal space due to overcrowding and personal space due to the lack of manners. Sitting your child on someone's lap on a bus, or...this one totally threw me...leaning your head on someone's shoulder, is not because Disney has crammed 10,000 people into one area. Thankfully I've been going to Disney for over 35 years, and I have yet to have any of that happen to me. (knock on wood)