Personal responsibility

[Jennasis]

I think it's dead. Nobody seems to want to take ownership of their choices or their situation. Much of my anger is a result of some legal issue I'm dealing with right now. We are in no way even remotely at fault, but does that stop the money-hungry, scam artist from trying? Of course not. Now I've got to get dragged through a costly legal fight.

I've got several family members playing the system like a dang fiddle. Some refuse to get jobs cause they simply do not want to work. Some haven't paid taxes or their mortgage in YEARS. All of them have learned to skirt by by taking advantage of either the messed up legal system, the government or their own family. And all of them feel the world OWES THEM A LIVING. That they are entitled to a piece of something from somebody else, just because they exist!

I'm just tired of doing everything right and still getting the dirty end of the stick, while others leech and mooch and then whine about their situation.

I pay my bills. Every month. On time. I bust my butt for what we have and we are grateful for it. I contribute to society with our charitable works. And some low-life thinks they can sue me for their own stupidity and try to take a piece of what I have worked so hard for??

I would love to see people take a little personal responsibility. Your kid fall and break his arm climbing your neighbors tree? Take him to the doctor and get a cast put on. Then give your kid a long lecture about staying out of your neighbors tree.

Someone bumps your car? Let the insurance handle it. Don't start screaming "neck injury!" or "spinal damage!" when you've got absolutely nothing wrong with you. It's not like winning the lotto...at least, it shouldn't be.

It's like someone burglarizing your home and slipping and breaking their neck and then being awarded a huge settlement when they sue you. It's ridiculous!

It's just so frustrating.

 

[dizluvah]

I think it's dead. Nobody seems to want to take ownership of their choices or their situation. Much of my anger is a result of some legal issue I'm dealing with right now. We are in no way even remotely at fault, but does that stop the money-hungry, scam artist from trying? Of course not. Now I've got to get dragged through a costly legal fight.

I've got several family members playing the system like a dang fiddle. Some refuse to get jobs cause they simply do not want to work. Some haven't paid taxes or their mortgage in YEARS. All of them have learned to skirt by by taking advantage of either the messed up legal system, the government or their own family. And all of them feel the world OWES THEM A LIVING. That they are entitled to a piece of something from somebody else, just because they exist!

I'm just tired of doing everything right and still getting the dirty end of the stick, while others leech and mooch and then whine about their situation.

I pay my bills. Every month. On time. I bust my butt for what we have and we are grateful for it. I contribute to society with our charitable works. And some low-life thinks they can sue me for their own stupidity and try to take a piece of what I have worked so hard for??

I would love to see people take a little personal responsibility. Your kid fall and break his arm climbing your neighbors tree? Take him to the doctor and get a cast put on. Then give your kid a long lecture about staying out of your neighbors tree.

Someone bumps your car? Let the insurance handle it. Don't start screaming "neck injury!" or "spinal damage!" when you've got absolutely nothing wrong with you. It's not like winning the lotto...at least, it shouldn't be.

It's like someone burglarizing your home and slipping and breaking their neck and then being awarded a huge settlement when they sue you. It's ridiculous!

It's just so frustrating.

I'm sorry that is happening to you and your family - try to enjoy your holidays and focus on what you can control.

 

[Art 1]

I hear ya and it makes me sick. Lowlife bums sit home and watch TV all day, what do they see? Commercials from lawyers, get into a fender bender, we'll get you some money. Dog bite? we'll get you some money.

I know a guy now, his daughter got into a very very minor fender bender. She wants money, lawyer has her going to the chiropractor, over 30 visits now. She is a low life and suing the other party. She is not injured. Makes me sick.

 

[tvguy]

No question about it. People have forgotten how to say "I made a mistake".

 

[Breezy_Carol]

I totally agree.

For sometime I have been saying that no one that personal responsibility for anything now.

 

[brerrabbit]

This is a huge pet peeve of mine. I feel the same as the OP in that I feel like I have done everything responsibly my whole life and done what I consider the right things while I observe others "getting away" with things. I pay my bills, I take care of my family, i take care of my house, I have had a job since I was 14 which was 37 years ago and generally do what I am suppose to. Then I see articles like the one yesterday where a lady in Florida has not paid her mortgage since October of 1985 and is still living in her house. She uses laws and proceedural loopholes to keep the repo guys away. Granted the banks and mortgage companies have been less than saints in everything that has happened but do you really have any justification at all for thinking you can live in a house for over 25 years and not pay the mortgage?

I blame it on society as a whole, we have become a me first society and are only interested in what's in it for me. Hard work and responsibility are not part of the equation for success anymore. People think they have a right to a great life merely by showing up. I have worked hard for what I have in life and still am way behind a lot of people because I won't use to much credit, and I won't live beyound my means. In the end I wind up paying in many ways for the lifestyles of others through taxes, fees, subsidies, and any other way the government can find to take my money.

Oh well, at least at the end of the day I can sleep well because I know there are still some people in the world who still feel the way I do.

 

[momof1princess]

OP, i'm sorry you're going through this, i know exactly how you feel. my brother and his wife borrowed money from my 81 year old grandmother last november, and promised to repay it in february, when they got their income tax refund. they also borrowed money from SIL's mom (who is loaded). guess who got repaid! SIL's mom! meanwhile, my grandmother, who lives on SS and my grandfather's small military pension (and is also supporting my mother, the queen of bad financial decisions), is STILL waiting to be repaid. they have also just filed bankruptcy, due to credit card debt and other bad decisions. my brother alone makes a 6 figure income and just got a raise a couple months ago; SIL has a business degree from Auburn and also makes a nice salary.
well, needless to say, when grandmother got brother's family's Christmas letter yesterday detailing their THREE vacations this summer, she was heartbroken that they had money to vacation so much (remember, while filing bankruptcy) but refused to repay the money they owe her. when mom found out, she called brother and gave him what for, at which point he cussed her out and hung up on her.
my brother is a spoiled rotten brat, always has been. he was the youngest grandchild for 20 years, and was babied until he got married; my mom STILL coddles him (at least, until yesterday, lol). he believes he is entitled to take total and complete advantage of all of us, and we're supposed to roll over and take it. it's gonna be a very merry Christmas! LOL

 

[DWGal210]

Jennasis, you are right on the money. I see it all
the time & it just shocks me. Those regulations, safety nets & policies are there to help those who truly need it. But you're right, there are those who have learned how to slither their way to get what they should not.

I have an aunt & uncle who
do this - my uncle is a lawyer, of all things - plus they have extra income from rental properties. But he's said that he doesn't mind having my grandparents (his in-laws) give them lots of $$ because "they have it, it should be given to us.". My sweet grandpa (who just passed away) didn't work his tail off to support his dead-beat son in law. Grrrr....

 

[Belle0101]

Oh man, where do I start?

Let's see I just got off the phone with my sister. She's on her way to the grocery. She was reading me her grocery list - candy, Little Debbie Cakes and the like. Of course she's going to the most expensive store around. I told her she could get the pudding that she wants cheaper at another store. Response? "Oh that's okay, I have food stamps."

Also, she's suing her ex-DH on a matter. She's planning to use the preceeds to pay her rent. She's mad because the case got bumped to January. How is she supposed to pay her rent now?

She can't go to her job interview on Thursday because the interviewer hasn't emailed her with a time. Wow, how about calling the interviewer and setting a time yourself?

Her UE ran out in October so she's on assistance. Not her fault of course. Well, except that she did turn down 2 job offers - one in December 2009, the other in March 2010. Each were paying $16 / hour but she wanted $17+ / hr.

Her daughter, my neice, got involved in something she shouldn't have with a schoolmate. That's over but she's got a bit of a reputation now. The answer? Call the police, get a restraining order, call the parent, demand the school provide her with a personal escort while on school grounds.

And then there's the guy who rear-ended DH Saturday. We picked up a copy of the police report and it clearly faults the other driver. And yet, that driver has never contacted his insurance. They are refusing our claim.

Jennasis, I so agree with you. I sincerely hope things turn around for you.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

It is certainly on the decline. Just once I would like someone to say I am sorry instead of immediately blaming someone or something.

 

[eliza61]

I would love to see people take a little personal responsibility. Your kid fall and break his arm climbing your neighbors tree? Take him to the doctor and get a cast put on. Then give your kid a long lecture about staying out of your neighbors tree.

Someone bumps your car? Let the insurance handle it. Don't start screaming "neck injury!" or "spinal damage!" when you've got absolutely nothing wrong with you. It's not like winning the lotto...at least, it shouldn't be.It's like someone burglarizing your home and slipping and breaking their neck and then being awarded a huge settlement when they sue you. It's ridiculous!

It's just so frustrating.

I'm going to play devils advocate and say let's take a look at the "man in the mirror". Not you personally but we, as in we the people.

First of all, lawyers are not the ones awarding these big time settlements, juries- you know those average jane and joes who live among us are.

No one thinks of the ramifications. It is like hitting the lotto. and sorry its not just "lazy bums" who are doing it. every body thinks if they sue, the "insurance company" will pay out but no one worries about where the "insurance company' will get the money from. hint: do you pay a premium.

Some of these people know most companies will pay out a settlement rather than fight.

kid falls out of a tree, of course the parent is going to sue because in her mind your home owners insurance will take care of it. First, of all nowadays most neighbors don't even know each other and God forbid you even discipline the kid for being in your yard and your tree. all hell breaks loose.

Sorry but this is the result of years and years of "me first", "get as much for me as possible, the heck with my neighbor".

 

[Katie's Butterflies]

I was thinking about this just last night.

I wish people would realize that their choices have consequences that they need to deal with.

For example, a friend of mine got $100 for doing some chores for an older couple. 3 days later, she was at my house, going through my cupboards, freezer etc pulling stuff out and saying “you don’t mind if I have this right? I‘m all out of food.” Um, yeah I do. I asked her what happened to the $100 she just earned and found out she “needed” a brand new purse she saw at the mall. (yeah, what happened to the 5 other ones?) Then she proceeds to ask me if she can borrow $20 for gas money. When I said, no. She became all huffy about how I was so lucky and how nothing good ever happened to her. Whenever I hear how lucky I am, I just want to scream. Lucky? Lucky! No, It’s not luck. It’s hard work and choices with a little luck thrown in.

OP I hear you. I’m sorry you have to deal with all this nonsense.

 

[manning]

A lot of it can be cleared up. In England you can sue anyone....However if you lose you pay all court cost and the defendant's legal cost. Gets rid of those who want to scam the system.

I think a legislator here is floating the idea.

 

[Art 1]

A lot of it can be cleared up. In England you can sue anyone....However if you lose you pay all court cost and the defendant's legal cost. Gets rid of those who want to scam the system.

I think a legislator here is floating the idea.

That's a good idea.

 

[KinziePooh]

It is certainly on the decline. Just once I would like someone to say I am sorry instead of immediately blaming someone or something.

It's amazing how many people are perfect and never do anything wrong. It's always someone else's fault.

 

[DWGal210]

A lot of it can be cleared up. In England you can sue anyone....However if you lose you pay all court cost and the defendant's legal cost. Gets rid of those who want to scam the system.

I think a legislator here is floating the idea.

Sign me up, I'll vote for that!!

 

[Jennasis]

I'm going to play devils advocate and say let's take a look at the "man in the mirror". Not you personally but we, as in we the people.

First of all, lawyers are not the ones awarding these big time settlements, juries- you know those average jane and joes who live among us are.

No one thinks of the ramifications. It is like hitting the lotto. and sorry its not just "lazy bums" who are doing it. every body thinks if they sue, the "insurance company" will pay out but no one worries about where the "insurance company' will get the money from. hint: do you pay a premium.

Some of these people know most companies will pay out a settlement rather than fight.

kid falls out of a tree, of course the parent is going to sue because in her mind your home owners insurance will take care of it. First, of all nowadays most neighbors don't even know each other and God forbid you even discipline the kid for being in your yard and your tree. all hell breaks loose.

Sorry but this is the result of years and years of "me first", "get as much for me as possible, the heck with my neighbor".

I agree with you. Never said lawyers were to blame...I hope that didn't come across in my post! My lawyer has been supremely helpful in dealing with my legal issues. Just got off the phone with him a short while ago. The pending law suit is dead. The letter he sent to the opposing attorney scared them off and the complaint against us never filed, but someone at the clerks office didn't file the thing correctly and they thought the case was still open.

You are certainly right about the insurance companies. Even when they pay it all eventually comes back to us..the policy holders when our premiums are due.

I just cannot stand watching people get away with the stuff they get away with.

 

[Art 1]

I agree with you. Never said lawyers were to blame...I hope that didn't come across in my post! My lawyer has been supremely helpful in dealing with my legal issues. Just got off the phone with him a short while ago. The pending law suit is dead. The letter he sent to the opposing attorney scared them off and the complaint against us never filed, but someone at the clerks office didn't file the thing correctly and they thought the case was still open.

You are certainly right about the insurance companies. Even when they pay it all eventually comes back to us..the policy holders when our premiums are due.

I just cannot stand watching people get away with the stuff they get away with.

Good for you, I'm glad it's over with for you.

 

[Heidict]

My DH and DD where rear ended Friday morning. He brought the car in to the shop and had the bumper replaced, to the tune of $1300 and the other guys insurance picked up the tab and paid for the rental. He just got the car back today and it looks better then before.

Of course, everyone at his job is telling him to run to the doctor and say his back hurts. He feels fine, our DD is fine, but they don't care. They just keep on him about claiming and injury that isn't there for a few thousand dollars.

 

[tlbwriter]

She became all huffy about how I was so lucky and how nothing good ever happened to her. Whenever I hear how lucky I am, I just want to scream. Lucky? Lucky! No, It’s not luck. It’s hard work and choices with a little luck thrown in.

"Yes, I'm lucky that I have enough sense not to make stupid choices!"