Overweight people.....

[GinnyEmma]

Not only is it appropriate to congratulate someone for making progress on their goals but many people need that outside encouragement. Whether we are discussing physical, educational or other personal goals.

I also can feel good about myself even if I do not see myself as perfect, lol. I always have a physical goal. My self worth is not based on achieving these goals, they are merely ways to motivate myself to stay active and healthy.

I think it is pretty stupid to suggest one can't be happy for someone else for something without having achieved it for myself. My bff just got her master's degree in nursing. Should I not congratulate her because if I really thought that was a good thing, then I would really get one for myself too.

 

[disneyismyname]

If you are beautiful no matter what you look like and you should learn to love and accept your size whatever it is, why do we contratulate and praise people who have acheived weight loss?

If you think it is so wonderful that they lost weight, aren't you saying that they were somehow "inferior" or "not as good" when they were heavier?

I'm overweight...and I don't think I look beautiful.

 

[happygirl]

I think everyone should be encouraged for attemping to meet there goals!!!

 

[Magic Mom]

I say congratulations because losing weight is hard work. Changing bad habits is hard work. Resisting temptation is hard work. I just lost 24 pounds, and hope to lose 15 more. I loved myself before, but I didn't love what I was doing to my body by letting myself gain so much weight.

I deserve congratualtions. I worked my butt off to lose those 23 pounds. I sat at faculty lunch after faculty lunch eating my protien and salad (dry) and fruit, watching everyone else indulge in amazing dips and casseroles and subs and desserts. On my birthday I passed on cake and a nice dinner out. So yay for me!

 

[Bungle]

I'm overweight. I look okay but do I think I will look better as the pounds come off? Yes. Do I let it determine my worth? NO.

I've been in both spaces, at a normal weight and 50 lbs over. I was healthier when I was thinner.

As for congratulating people yes I do. Losing weight is hard. If it were easy there would be no lap bands, weight watchers, or curves. A compliment or a good job really helps both with motivation and support.

 

[GinnyEmma]

So, op, do you think people should stop congratulating others for their achievments, or just feel sucky about themselves? What is your point?

 

[Magic Mom]

So you shouldn't congratulate someone for their weight loss?

The world is becoming too freakin complicated!

 

[NikitaZee]

I worked my butt off to lose the last of my baby weight. I ate up every compliment and praise that I got. In fact, it would have probably bothered me if no one noticed or mentioned it to me. I always compliment someone on weight loss - wow! you look great! I don't see how that would ever be taken the wrong way, unless you're dealing with someone who's already on the defensive.

 

[sparks19]

I think it's more of a congratulations on the EFFORT. it's not easy to lose weight. it takes hard work and dedication for someone who is obese and set in their ways.

Weight doesn't tend to just disappear on it's own I am in the process of losing weight and I do like the recognition when someone says "WOW have you lost weight?" because I've worked hard to every pound I have lost

I love myself. I am confident in myself... but I also know that I am living an unhealthy lifestyle and if I really love myself I should take better care of myself

 

[Debbie7452]

Oh please! If they are proud of their achievement in losing weight then it is OK to be happy for them and say something nice. It is also sensitive if you consider the words you are using to do so, that they are not infering insult. For Example: I lost 40 pounds in college. One guy I ran into after the weight loss said "Wow! You lost a TON!"

I did not take offense, but this wasn't the nicest compliment I've ever heard

 

[L107ANGEL]

I do agree with this. You might see me, a little overweight, eating a brownie and think wow, what a fat pig. But you don't know how much I exercise, what my calorie count for that day is. Maybe I am treating myself for working out every day last week.

I had a "friend" post a FB rant about me "killing myself" and "everyone can see you have a problem" and I shouldn't "celebrate (my) problem with food" after I posted photos of the cakes and cookies I was baking over Christmas. What she didn't know was that every single thing I was baking was to take to someone else. So the fact that I'm overweight means I shouldn't bake a cake to take to the homeless shelter at Christmas?

Your post brought me to tears!! No friend should treat you like that, EVER!
As for the rest of you making changes, I will just say GO YOU!!!!!
I will say again that the most common acceptable form of discrimination is to those that are "over weight".
It makes me ill honestly.
I am going to be quitting smoking soon and the comments from some are encouraging, some, well not so much.
All I know is no matter your what, I would love everyone to love the skin thier in.
That is so important!

 

[DisneyScraps]

I lost 110 pounds 4 years ago. I get congratulated all the time, why? Because I changed my life. I am much healthier I am going to most likely live longer. At my gym I get a lot of attention because I there daily and the regulars have watched the transformation.

I also changed my young daughters life, she won't be obese because she is watching a mother that lives healthy.

Unfortunately when I was heavy, no matter how beautiful I looked or thought that I looked society didn't. I have been on both sides and people treat you very differently when you are thin and fashionable. It makes me sad sometimes because it's not right I am the SAME person on the inside but it's how the world works.

Lisa

 

[Conservative Hippie]

Your post brought me to tears!! No friend should treat you like that, EVER!
As for the rest of you making changes, I will just say GO YOU!!!!!
I will say again that the most common acceptable form of discrimination is to those that are "over weight".
It makes me ill honestly.
I am going to be quitting smoking soon and the comments from some are encouraging, some, well not so much.
All I know is no matter your what, I would love everyone to love the skin thier in.
That is so important!

It was pretty devastating to read, and I haven't put up any photos of myself since. I'm still working on baby weight, and it's really harsh to hear criticism like that from someone who has never had kids - for some women it is a lot harder to lose weight after a baby, no matter what you do.

I just kept telling myself that I can lose the weight, but she'll always be a *cough*...

 

[ols386]

I worked my butt off to lose the last of my baby weight. I ate up every compliment and praise that I got. In fact, it would have probably bothered me if no one noticed or mentioned it to me. I always compliment someone on weight loss - wow! you look great! I don't see how that would ever be taken the wrong way, unless you're dealing with someone who's already on the defensive.

As well you should have.

Congratulations!!

 

[Art 1]

I lost 110 pounds 4 years ago. I get congratulated all the time, why? Because I changed my life. I am much healthier I am going to most likely live longer. At my gym I get a lot of attention because I there daily and the regulars have watched the transformation.

I also changed my young daughters life, she won't be obese because she is watching a mother that lives healthy.

Unfortunately when I was heavy, no matter how beautiful I looked or thought that I looked society didn't. I have been on both sides and people treat you very differently when you are thin and fashionable. It makes me sad sometimes because it's not right I am the SAME person on the inside but it's how the world works.

Lisa

Congratulations on your weight loss. That's amazing.

 

[Goofyluver]

Expressing kindness with judgment is like giving a present just because you expect something in return.

Congratulations = support. Nothing more, nothing less.

If you can't or don't want to offer support or congratulations, then don't do it.

 

[DisneyScraps]

Congratulations on your weight loss. That's amazing.

trying to get me into trouble on here????

Thanks!

A happy Thursday to everyone!

Lisa

 

[glasslipper]

I say congratulations because losing weight is hard work. Changing bad habits is hard work. Resisting temptation is hard work. I just lost 24 pounds, and hope to lose 15 more. I loved myself before, but I didn't love what I was doing to my body by letting myself gain so much weight.

I deserve congratualtions. I worked my butt off to lose those 23 pounds. I sat at faculty lunch after faculty lunch eating my protien and salad (dry) and fruit, watching everyone else indulge in amazing dips and casseroles and subs and desserts. On my birthday I passed on cake and a nice dinner out. So yay for me!

Congratulations! I recently lost 65lbs and it is hard work, and I didn't think I was beautiful overweight. I was unhealthy and not happy with myself, so congrats to me too! For me the most important thing is that I feel better and am healthier. Congrats to everyone who has worked hard to achieve a goal and have accomplished it!! It is just being supportive and basically nice to compliment someone. What is wrong with being nice anymore?

 

[C.Ann]

If you are beautiful no matter what you look like and you should learn to love and accept your size whatever it is, why do we contratulate and praise people who have acheived weight loss?

If you think it is so wonderful that they lost weight, aren't you saying that they were somehow "inferior" or "not as good" when they were heavier?

I don't see it as being about love and acceptance based on ones size - or being "inferior" or "not as good" prior.. It's no different than congratulating a 2nd grader for a perfect grade on a spelling test; your high school senior for wailing the ball out of the park during a game; your DH for receiving a promotion at work; your best friend for graduating from college at the age of 35 - while juggling a home, job, & family all at the same time; a Girl Scout for earning a new badge; etc., etc..

What could possibly be wrong with giving praise for achievements - no matter how big or small - regardless of the reasoning for that persons efforts?

What a sad world it would be if no one ever recognized each others efforts in their endeavors..

 

[arminnie]

So you shouldn't congratulate someone for their weight loss?

The world is becoming too freakin complicated!

I would never get offended by any compliment - but it can be complicated.

I lost a lot of weight after an illness - NO effort on my part. It was not an accomplishment although I was not unhappy at all to get rid of the weight. Didn't like the process though!

It was kind of weird when people complimented me. If I told them it was just a side effect they thought I was dying or had been very seriously ill. It was not fun - but it was a botched gallbladder removal not cancer or anything I couldn't recover from.

I have kept it off for over 10 years. I moved about the same time so people that I know now can't believe that I was ever heavy. I was probably prettier as an 18 than an 8 because I was a lot younger then!