Out of the mouths of babes..............

[always quiet]

Have your kids ever said something when they were little that was SO true yet very inappropriate? Something that made you, as a parent, want to sink down and dissolve into the floor??

In 2000, when my youngest was 5, we all went into Starr Tours. In the row behind us piles in about 6 men from 'non-American' decent. All of a sudden, the smell of body order became over-whelming! The car was packed with people and there was no way to escape from the offending smell. Jessica asks, quite loudly I might add, "Mommy, what smells in here?!! It stinks!!!" I can only hope that since the men were not speaking English that they didn't understand anything that she said!!

 

[jwsqrdplus2]

We were at the grocery store, and I was finished shopping. The grocery store by us has those carts that have trcuks/cars for the kids as the front end, and DD1 (then 4) was in the truck. We get to the cashier and DD decides to saty in the car(t) so she is behind the cashier while I am in front of her while she scans my grocieries. Our cashier was Pooh sized, and her rear end was in DD's line of sight. DD looks up at me and says, "Mommy, her butt is big." Fortunately the cashier didn't hear, but I wanted the earth to open up right under my feet.

 

[Stepharoonie!]

Miss Maddy informed half of Target one night there was a man picking his nose, and it "is very disgusting".

While it WAS disgusting, it was really embarrassing to hear her yell that. The man looked pretty embarrassed, as well.

 

[Disney Doll]

This isn't a true but embarrassing story, but it is quite cute...

We have friends who have a son with Downs Syndrome. When he was an infant, he was quite sick, and spent quite a bit of time in the hospital. One day, his mom called me to come and get their older daughter (age 4), as their son was taking a turn for the worse at home, and they had just called the ambulance. I lived about 3 minutes away, so off I went!

I got to their house just seconds before the ambulance, and bundled their daughter into my car, in an effort to get her out before all the hoopla started. Unfortunately, a police car(which always accompanies an ambulance in our town) blocked me in, so we had to wait until everybody left.

Later that day, their daugter and I were in the local grocery store, where all the cashiers know everyone. The cashier said to her "Oh, where's your Mommy today and brother today?" She replied "Well, the police came and took my brother away, and my Mommy went with him in the big car. My Daddy followed them in our car." Of course, essentially that's what happened, since the policeman came out helping the EMTs carry all the stuff they had the baby hooked up to, put him in the ambulance(the "big car"), Mommy got into the ambulance, and Daddy followed in their car. Of course, the cashier stood there with a look of shock on her face until I explained that the baby had been rushed to the hospital and the police accompanied the ambulance. Amazing how kids perceive things!

 

[Brer_Papa]

Grandson was playing in the sandbox....he was 5 at the time...

He was playing with dump trucks and payloaders and the like...

Neighbor kid....also age 5 or so....comes over and they play in the sandbox...

after a bit...the debates start...

"the "my Mom" debate over whois prettiest, smartest or nicest ended in a draw...

likewise, the debate over "my Dad" is stronger, bigger or more handsome seemed to end in a tie..

The comparison of who had the prettiest, smarter, nicest or even meanest sister had no clear cut winner....

the debate came to a close when my DGS announced...

"My Papa shaves his ears..."

 

[Serena]

 

[shleybird]

I put myself through 4 years of Nursing school as a single parent. Money to say the least was really tight. I had promised my daughter as soon as I got my first pay check I would take her to Wal Mart, and she could pick out several new toys.
Upon recieving my first check, I did exactly as I had said I would and maybe went a little over board. At the check out, the cashier asked my daughter if it was her birthday, or a special occasion. My wonderful 4 year old told her and everyone in line around us, as loud as she could,

" We are not poor anymore, my momma got a job "

I know now that she was just proud of what we had accomplished, because she was there every step of the way, but at the time I wanted to hide under the counter while I payed for her toys.

 

[VampHeartless]

These are all pretty funny.

I'm going to try and do this without the bad words.

My contribution. Growing up, we ran a daycare, and one point one of the two year old boys began running around the house yelling the f word really loud. We couldn't figure out where he was getting it from, or his parents, and he would not stop! He seemed confused when we were scolding him.

Well, the confusion came to end one day, when there was a fire in our neighborhood, and as the fire truck rolled down the street, the two year old ran around the house excited and overjoyed, screaming "fire f*!! Fire f**!".

 

[always quiet]

Years and years ago, my mom watched my nephew during the day. My mom hardly ever used curse words, but she did have a favorite one when she would drop something (S*&^). I don't even think she realized it when she would say it.

One day, she was doing something when my nephew was over, he was about 2 at the time. She dropped something and my nephew walked up to her and said "Aw, s - - - , huh Grandma"

 

[BethanyF]

Ive got 2 good ones

I was in Hobby Lobby with my son, about 3 or 4 at the time, and a friend. We were in line waiting to have some ribbon cut when a very grandmotherly looking lady started talking to Sam. He looked her right in the eyes and growled 'GET OUT OF MY FACE' I pretty much wanted to die and my girlfriend was no help. She ran to another aisle where we could all hear her laughing hysterically.

Same kid a couple months later. We were in WalMart this time, and walking down the shampoo aisle. He spotted the Herbal Essences and started imitating the commercial. Banging his hand on the cart handle and screaming/moaning 'yes, yes, yes' over and over again.

There are a ton more from him, but those 2 are a couple of my favorites.