Out of the mouth of little kids

[manning]

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children fell to discussing the dog's duties.

"They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster.

"No," said another, "he's just for good luck."

A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."

 

[golfgal]

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children fell to discussing the dog's duties.

"They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster.

"No," said another, "he's just for good luck."

A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."

 

[GeorgeG]

Hey, it makes sense!

They were actually used back in the days of horse-drawn fire equipment to keep other dogs away from the horses when responding to fires.

 

[SandrA9810]

I was talking to a mom one time with an adopted child from china.

Some one was having a conversation with the little girl and asked her "where are you from?" Just in general where her hometown is. But the girl responded "I was made in China".

 

[MinnieMe87]

I was talking to a mom one time with an adopted child from china.

Some one was having a conversation with the little girl and asked her "where are you from?" Just in general where her hometown is. But the girl responded "I was made in China".

Too cute!!

My friend's little boy has a hard time with wanting to wash his hair while taking a shower. So she told him one day that if he didn't wash his hair, his hair would fall out, and he believed her. Fast forward to a couple weeks later at a car show, we were walking around and stopped to talk to my uncle. My uncle has very thinning hair, so he shaves his head bald. If he let it grow he would have red curly hair like my friend's little boy.

So he said to him "You know, if I had hair..it would look just like yours!"

My friend's little boy looked at him with the most serious look on his face and said "You don't have any cause you don't wash your hair!!

I of course start cracking up, while my friend is horrified. My Uncle thought it was hilarious too!

 

[KAMKIM]

This is a great thread...

My daughter was 2 years old at the time, my mother who has a bad back was watching her. My mom got up out of her chair but kind of moaned a little bit because of her back...DD said...Grandma...are you poopin?

 

[KAMKIM]

got another one,...youngest daughter this time

Every fall DH puts plastic on the windows to help insulate our house a little bit during the winter...so he was doing the girls windows, youngest DD asks him Dada what are you doing? He says..i'm putting plastic up to keep the drafts out....she runs downstairs....mama....sissy....dada is keeping the giraffes out!


Same kid - fast forward 1 year...

I'm doing dishes, DD comes in and says real serious like...mama I want to play with man nuggets.....um....I put the dish down and stare at her....I'm certain I'm missing something....did you just say man nuggets? yes mama the man nuggets I want to play with them. My brain is going crazy for what man nuggets could possibly be ..all the while trying not to think of man nuggets....I know she must be mispronouncing SOMETHING...what are man nuggets?? and why do you want to play with them? DD says I love the little man nuggets mama, I want to play with sissy's man nuggets....at this point I'm laughing in her face and can barely breath....I told her show me what you are talking about...

She takes me in the living room points to the closet, and to the box of MAGNETIX lmao man nuggets....

 

[nephthys43]

got another one,...youngest daughter this time

Every fall DH puts plastic on the windows to help insulate our house a little bit during the winter...so he was doing the girls windows, youngest DD asks him Dada what are you doing? He says..i'm putting plastic up to keep the drafts out....she runs downstairs....mama....sissy....dada is keeping the giraffes out!


Same kid - fast forward 1 year...

I'm doing dishes, DD comes in and says real serious like...mama I want to play with man nuggets.....um....I put the dish down and stare at her....I'm certain I'm missing something....did you just say man nuggets? yes mama the man nuggets I want to play with them. My brain is going crazy for what man nuggets could possibly be ..all the while trying not to think of man nuggets....I know she must be mispronouncing SOMETHING...what are man nuggets?? and why do you want to play with them? DD says I love the little man nuggets mama, I want to play with sissy's man nuggets....at this point I'm laughing in her face and can barely breath....I told her show me what you are talking about...

She takes me in the living room points to the closet, and to the box of MAGNETIX lmao man nuggets....

omg! i'm laughing so hard, i'm crying!!!

 

[KAMKIM]

omg! i'm laughing so hard, i'm crying!!!

I didn't know for a split second if i should laugh or be concerned that my child was requesting to play with man nuggets LMAO

 

[DLR29]

Man nuggets.

 

[rascalmom]

"Man nuggets" - if that's not tag worthy, I don't know what is!!!

 

[redlight]

"They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."

Too funny!

 

[Liberty Belle]

Some cute stories on here!

I've posted this one before but when he was little my son and I were in the car. He said, "Mom, how long does a pyramid last?" I told him thousands of years. There was silence and then he said, "No, I mean the kind girls get in the bathroom." He's sixteen now and hates it when I tell the story.

Oh, and I had a student who called Abraham Lincoln "A. Hamburger Lincoln" and my son, until this year - he's six, called him "Hammerman Lincoln."

 

[KAMKIM]

I got another one but its not about the kids - its about DH

When we first moved in together I sent him to the store for tampons.

He goes to the store - grabs a box of light, regular, super and takes them all to the cashier and says ..."I'm not sure which ones to get, my GF weighs about 120lbs" The cashier scanned the regulars and didn't say a word but I'm sure she still tells that story

When he came home and told me I just about died.... weight limit on tampons

 

[DWGal210]

I love threads like these! Kids do say "the darndest things."

When we were younger, there was a couple that lived across the street from us. Their yard was very beautiful, lots of flowers, etc. One day we were walking by and my brother, who was 4 at the time, asked my mom why their yard looked nicer than ours. My mom explained that they didn't have any young kids so they had more time to spend in their yard, etc, and that someday when we kids were older we could spend more time in our yard too.

So a few days later, we are walking by again and this gal is in her yard, gardening. My brother goes up to her and says, "Mrs. Smith, you have a very pretty yard." "Why thank you, sweetie!", she said, smiling at him.

It would have been nice if it ended there. Then my brother follows it up with, "And my mom says that when she has as much time on her hands as you do, we'll have a nice yard too!"

My mom said she was mortified - she gave the gal a smile and then we hustled home.

 

[Pooh_Friend#1]

Man nuggets.

 

[spacemountain]

These stories are so funny. I'm sure I know some more, but this is the only one coming to mind right now.

We have a little one in the family who is 2 years old. For awhile this summer she ran around yelling "look at my nipples!!" It was so hard to keep a straight face. But then her 4 year old older sister starting saying it too because it was making people laugh so much. And no one knows where she even heard it

 

[manning]

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned
out to be an optical Aleutian