OT: Why are all the working moms running our PTA?

[jillyjoey]

There should be 2 meetings. 1 is a meeting for just the board members. The 2nd is the general meeting for ALL PTA members. If you paid your dues, you are allowed to attend the meeting.

I agree that it seems wrong to have the board meetings during the day since it doesn't allow everyone works that wants to be on the board to attend.

I would find out when your General meetings are and voice your concerns. Since you will have other PTA members at the meeting, maybe other parents will join in and want to know answers to the same questions you have.

Like others said, you can talk to the Prinicpal. If you don't have luck with that, or don't feel comfortable talking to him/her, check to see who your local council rep is. Everyone should have one for their area. I beleive you can go to your state's PTA website to find that info.

Jen

We don't pay dues If you have a child in the school, you automatically are part of the PTO . One prior school, we did have dues -- but that was the same school that had the evening meetings.

And, while the PTO elected rotfl: ) members may meet every morning for coffee -- the only open meetings are those announced during the day

It just makes me laugh when they say don't have volunteers when I have signed up for so many committees. Now -- I just go to my kids' teachers and ask what I can do for them (which usually means writing a check too).-- I am quite good at that.

 

[McKelly]

I guess I am lucky. Our PTK currently is run by all working moms. I myself am a SAHM and I don't feel like I don't belong when I do attend the meetings, which is NOT regularly. I do see them all together in the hallways chatting, maybe to someone looking on that might be considered a "clique", however my experience with them has been anything but. Maybe they backstab me when I walk away, but I guess I am just giving them the benefit of the doubt!

It has been my experience that there are going to be cliques no matter what organization you are a part of. If there are women, it is going to happen!! I guess I just go to PTK because as a parent I feel that it is my duty to keep myself informed and to help out in my children's school. I don't pay too much attention to the others who might be there for different reasons. Maybe that is why I don't notice!

 

[jodifla]

Our meetings are at 7 p.m. the second Tuesday of each month, which seems pretty reasonable to me. Most working parents and SAHPs should be able to get there, but for some reason, I notice it's the woman with at least a part time job that are doing everything....There are about 250 kids in the school, but fewer than 10 parents showed up last Tuesday night.

I just thought the dynamics were odd....but I'm new to the whole PTA thing.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Our meetings are at 7 p.m. the second Tuesday of each month, which seems pretty reasonable to me. Most working parents and SAHPs should be able to get there, but for some reason, I notice it's the woman with at least a part time job that are doing everything....There are about 250 kids in the school, but fewer than 10 parents showed up last Tuesday night.

I just thought the dynamics were odd....but I'm new to the whole PTA thing.

That sounds reasonable to me. I would think it's odd too. You can also bet that all the parents who never show up or do anything will be the first to complain. That was how it was at my ds's pre-school. Some parents didn't help with anything and they were always burning torches on some kind of crusade.

 

[Whosemom]

OK, your schedule isn't everyone's schedule. At no time in the last ten years could I make a Tuesday 7:00 meeting. And if DH went, he'd spend the whole time chasing the kids, so how would that be beneificial to anyone?

I never complained about the time, because I figure you can't find a time that works for everyone. But to run down people who weren't there...do you live in their shoes? Do you know where they were?

My point both previously and now is this - you DO NOT KNOW in what way the other people are supporting the school (and oh yes, EVERYONE's checkbook is out again and again, since that seems to be an issue). Just assume everyone IS doing their part, and you will probably be closer to the truth.

 

[jodifla]

OK, your schedule isn't everyone's schedule. At no time in the last ten years could I make a Tuesday 7:00 meeting. And if DH went, he'd spend the whole time chasing the kids, so how would that be beneificial to anyone?

I never complained about the time, because I figure you can't find a time that works for everyone. But to run down people who weren't there...do you live in their shoes? Do you know where they were?

My point both previously and now is this - you DO NOT KNOW in what way the other people are supporting the school (and oh yes, EVERYONE's checkbook is out again and again, since that seems to be an issue). Just assume everyone IS doing their part, and you will probably be closer to the truth.

On nights DH can't be home on time, I get a sitter so I can attend the PTA meeting.....

 

[Whosemom]

We don't have a sitter. Someone mentioned this earlier as well, WOHM are more likely to have that resource. And, to you, that seems odd. One way isn't better than another, just different. The point still being, don't think that just because people aren't supporting the school in front of you at the same way and time that you are, that they aren't supporting the school at all.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

We don't have a sitter. Someone mentioned this earlier as well, WOHM are more likely to have that resource. And, to you, that seems odd. One way isn't better than another, just different. The point still being, don't think that just because people aren't supporting the school in front of you at the same way and time that you are, that they aren't supporting the school at all.

I understand where you are coming from as we don't have a sitter either -BUT- I will tell you that even if you aren't at meetings you can still help out. I am talking about the parents who can't even lift a finger (and I don't mean doing anything big) and then they want to complain to anyone who will listen. That is just wrong.

 

[jodifla]

We don't have a sitter. Someone mentioned this earlier as well, WOHM are more likely to have that resource. And, to you, that seems odd. One way isn't better than another, just different. The point still being, don't think that just because people aren't supporting the school in front of you at the same way and time that you are, that they aren't supporting the school at all.

So, in what ways do you support your school, then? I'm just curious....

 

[jillyjoey]

So, in what ways do you support your school, then? I'm just curious....

I'll jump in here ... there are other ways to support the school other than going to PTO meetings.

Our teachers provide a wish list every year... on average, I spend $150 buying off each teacher's wish list for their classroom.

I donated the paint to repaint DS's classroom

Through the library (not the PTO) I volunteer to read to the classes at lunchtime.

They always get my check -when they do fundraisers -- sell this much or send in $$

I purchase an ad in the yearbook

I participate in the science fair, the multi-cultural market and other school fair activities that are not PTO run.


There are plenty of things you can do that are not PTO related. I am sure that the PTO board members do not know how I have donated my time and my money to the school in these ways.

 

[Sandi]

My DD's school is fine and all the parents have to be a part of the school's operation (it's a Montessori school). But, if I felt I was not being heard, I would sure do something about it. Get the bylaws and see if those cliques -- whatever they consist of -- are operating as they should. If not, call them on it and do what's right.

 

[Whosemom]

I spend two hours every Wednesday doing lunch and recess duty. I have children in three grades and drive/chaperone for every field trip (we don't have busing available for that). I attend and help with every class party (I don't know how it is that they have managed to not overlap this year, but due to vageries in scheduling they haven't). I also chip in money wise for those parties. I am the leader for the 2nd grade girl scout troop. When a teacher sends home a note that she/he needs help with something I contact them and help however I can. I send food for fundraising "fairs". I man some giant inflatible thing or other at the "feild day". Whatever else comes up - especially if it is on someone's mind at 1:00 on Wednseday when I am finishing up with recess.

What do you do? I'm sure you do as much, but in different ways at different times. I'm afraid this is going to turn my comments into "who does more, sahm or wohm" which has not been my intent at all. So I will reiterate my point. If you don't see what someone else is doing, that doesn't mean they aren't doing anything!! Don't assume people not at the meetings are not contributing.

 

[jodifla]

I spend two hours every Wednesday doing lunch and recess duty. I have children in three grades and drive/chaperone for every field trip (we don't have busing available for that). I attend and help with every class party (I don't know how it is that they have managed to not overlap this year, but due to vageries in scheduling they haven't). I also chip in money wise for those parties. I am the leader for the 2nd grade girl scout troop. When a teacher sends home a note that she/he needs help with something I contact them and help however I can. I send food for fundraising "fairs". I man some giant inflatible thing or other at the "feild day". Whatever else comes up - especially if it is on someone's mind at 1:00 on Wednseday when I am finishing up with recess.

What do you do? I'm sure you do as much, but in different ways at different times. I'm afraid this is going to turn my comments into "who does more, sahm or wohm" which has not been my intent at all. So I will reiterate my point. If you don't see what someone else is doing, that doesn't mean they aren't doing anything!! Don't assume people not at the meetings are not contributing.

actually, you do way more than I! our school is a public preschool, and doesn't have a lunchroom or anything... I go to the monthly meetings, I helped with the Halloween event, do the book cart every other week, am in charge of the teacher preview for the book fair, am helping to set up the book fair, take it down, and doing the teacher appreciation lunch.

But only about 10 percent of the parents there do anything at all, and I'm surprised it's the working mom who take the lead since they have tight schedules.

 

[Whosemom]

oh yeah, the book fair, I forgot that. LOL.

I would think at a preschool a pretty high percentage of the parents would be people that work outside the home.

But anyway - I can definitely seean "office-y" oriented person being more likely to step up to that kind of position. Even at church, I spend alot of time saying no to committees and committee meetings and yes to what needs done. Which more often than not did NOT come through tthe committee. I'm such a rebel.

By the way...have you ever heard of the 20/80 rule? In any organization, 20% of the people do 80% of the work. LOL. So don't feel like you are alone. just don't base it on meeting attendence.

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

I feel like this entire thread is once again about women working against women again!
Not sure why this always seems to happen....

 

[jodifla]

oh yeah, the book fair, I forgot that. LOL.

I would think at a preschool a pretty high percentage of the parents would be people that work outside the home.

But anyway - I can definitely seean "office-y" oriented person being more likely to step up to that kind of position. Even at church, I spend alot of time saying no to committees and committee meetings and yes to what needs done. Which more often than not did NOT come through tthe committee. I'm such a rebel.

By the way...have you ever heard of the 20/80 rule? In any organization, 20% of the people do 80% of the work. LOL. So don't feel like you are alone. just don't base it on meeting attendence.

There are two programs...an all day program with lots of working parents, and the traditional, 2 1/2 preschool which is 2 days a week for the 3 year olds, and 3 days a week for 4s....most of those families seem to have one stay/work at home parent.

Yeah, I've heard of the 80/20 rule! So true.

 

[Aristomommy]

Our PTO has mostly SAHM members, but this is the norm in our city in general. When I was a SAHM, I couldn't attend meetings ether because of younger siblings. Now working part-time, I could take time off work to attend a meeting easier than I would have back then. I would think meeting in the evening time would allow the greatest number of attendance as spouses are at home to watch all children. Our school have very active parent volunteers, but most of them are SAHMs.

 

[Lisa_Belle]

Well, get this - our school doesn't even have a PTA. It's a private school, and it seems as though the administration doesn't want parent participation except for kiddie crowd control during a few parties a year.

But in just about every volunteer organization, there are always a few people who do most of the work. It happens at school, church, community activities, just about everywhere.

For those of you whose PTAs are having schedule duels, why not have some of the meetings during the noon lunch hour and some in the evenings? We tried this in our local Junior League when we had about a 50% working membership, and it was a big hit. The president and VP would swap out over who presided at what meeting. Sometimes even noon meetings are more convenient for working parents because of their children's evening activities, and sometimes evening meetings are more convenient for SAHMs who can find a sitter to watch the children at that hour.

 

[McKelly]

I agree LisaBelle - in fact, our PTK is in the planning stages of offering two different times for meetings as well, to hopefully increase meeting attendance.

Our PTK, puts out a very detailed letter of what went on at the meetings (minutes), which goes into every child's Friday Folder (take home folder). This letter gives a pretty good overview of what went on at the meetings for anyone who was unable to attend. It also is on letterhead, listing all the Pres., VP, Treas, and Secretarys home phone number, if there any questions/comments. Does everybody's PTK/A do that?

 

[meandtheguys2]

Last time I looked, all moms worked...