OT - sending DD7 to overnight camp, tell me I shouldn't worry

[jlw29]

This is such a child dependent decision (and family dependent). I know that I could have sent my younger DD (who is now 8) to overnight camp a few YEARS ago and she would have had a great time and been fine (except she may not have brushed her hair for a week!) while my older DD (almost 11 now) still wouldn't be ready for it emotionally NOW.

I'm a big believer in encouraging independence in children. If you think your DD is ready for camp -- go for it!

 

[pigletof4]

My daughter went to a one night Girl Scout camp a few weeks ago and enjoyed it. During the summer our local Girl Scouts offer shorter camps during the summer for first time campers, so she is going to one Sunday - Tuesday. She is able to pick a cabin buddy, so she will be with someone she knows.

Non-Girl Scouts can attend for an additional $10.

This is what my daughter wants to do. The one night for girl scouts. I was talking to another leader who was turning her daughers form in for the same thing and put my daughter down as her buddy. They are the same age and won't turn 7 until the end of July. I am so nervous. Here we drop them off at 6pm on Friday and pick them up at 10am Saturday. I was going to wait until next year when she could do the three day mini camp, but she wants to go. We have done day camp, but the overnight camp is at a different camp.

 

[carone0318]

My dd went to sleep away camp for a week last year when she was 8, going into 4th grade. She wanted to go and she did fine. It was an extremely structured camp, it was actually a gymnastics camp, so each day they did like 6 sessions of gymnastics and their free time was limited, but they were with their group during free time, not wandering around on their own. She couldn't call home, nor could we call there and there were no visitors on the property allowed (kind of liked that rule). She did get email from us everyday, which worked out well. Also the camp put pictures up on a daily basis from around the camp with what the kids were doing so sometimes she would be in a few pictures, which was neat.

This yr she has decided not to go to gym camp, but has decided to go to sleep away soccer camp. She went to this soccer camp last year, but as a commuter, this yr she wants to sleep there.

Like others have said it really depends on your child.

 

[mlwear]

IMO, she is too young. I won't qualify it with "you know your daughter". But again, this is MY opinion. 7 going on 8 years is too young. If you have to ask, she is too young.
I went to 4-H camp when I was 9 years old. I had plenty of friends there. My parents knew the counselors. I was a very independent child. Five nights away from home, esp. in that environment was scary. I was homesick and often cried at night. I did not use the greatest hygiene either. (I particularly remember my mother being furious about this when she picked me up, which was really the last thing I needed after a week of being homesick.)

At age 10, I was nervous to go to the camp (I know my mom wanted us out of her hair for a week), but did much better. As I got older, I enjoyed it until junior high age.

I think the idea of a one night camp as onother poster wrote of, may be a good idea for your situation.

Although, it may be comparing apples to oranges, but for some reason this is how I judge it: is the child independent enough to spend the better part of a day (not night--day) at home by herself/himself? Before anyone writes or flames, I know there are counselors there (but despite credentials, you don't really know what these people are really like--I have a couple of personal stories that I'd rather not share about highly regarded camp counselors). I know it is not the same, but it is a indicator of the child's ability to care for one's self, understand safety and cope with being alone (which is how camp will feel at times).

I have considered camp for my now 11 year old. I would probably be comfortable with a three night camp. But, as of now, I have in mind sending him to an overnight camp next year when he is 12. I do think I am bit on the protective side (but there are other issues).

My personal suggestion is to do a search on summer camps in general and see what the minimum age is for the majority of them. That would be another objective indicator. If very few else will accept 7 year olds, that tells you something. If most do, that may confirm a decision. My personal opinion, as stated before is wait, there should be no rush to send her off to camp. It will be there next year and the year after.

Best of luck with your decision.

 

[brandip22]

Seems like a lot of different opinions here, so I'll add mine! I went to overnight camp when I was 6, almost 7. My sister who was older, also went, but we did not stay in the same cabin. I then went on to go to that camp, every year until I was out of college! As a camper, I only went for one week at a time, but I went for all the weeks as a counselor. As a counselor, I have seen kids who were 12 and not ready and seen kids who were 7 and ready to stay a month! So, it does depend on your child. I saw that a poster said not to listen to you child- well, she didn't say it in those words, but basically. I say the opposite, out of experience with 100s of kids. But, don't just listen to them now, when it sounds dreamy and fun, listen all the time. What you are doing in getting her ready is right- make sure she can wash her hair and brush her teeth, dress herself, etc. I'd pack her clothes in large zip-lock bags that have everything for the day in there. That helps a lot. In our camp, each cabin had one big shower and about 4 shower heads. We had 4 or 5 campers in there at a time, so they all helped each other. The counselors stayed close to make sure the water wasn't too hot and the girls had all the soap out of their hair and all that. Plus, I always made sure they brushed their teeth and were actually dry before getting into bed! I have nothing but good memories of camp- even the girls who were homesick usually ended up being fine. Most counselors will take mroe time with those and love on them more. As a counselor, I always wanted the youngest cabin because those were the sweet ones, even if a little homesick. There were many nights I fell asleep snuggled up holding one of my campers and reading or signing to them.
Also, as a camper, they really get to learn about themselves in a way that they can't at home. I was more independant, too. I learned how to brush my hair and all that. Of course, a 7 year old won't be able to do a perfect job, but that's what the counselors do, too.
BTW, my camp was also a YMCA camp, so they are pretty structured. In fact, one of the campers and then counselors I went to camp with all my life is now the director. I can't wait until my son is ready to go. Of course, that means when he's ready, not always just when he's 7, though. I think you'll know if she's ready. If she's whining when you leave, maybe she's not ready.

 

[goofyforlife]

My DD now 12 (13 next month) has been going to GS camps for at least 5-6 yrs now. Camp were Sunday to Friday. The first year was hard (she wouldn't use the outhouses but then the second yr things got better.)

I think she is better off for her experience. (Less intolerant to dirt and bugs and such. At her age, i hated camping let alone living in a tent for a week)

And as for worrying about hair and showering, Don't worry, all the girls come back looking a fright, there clothes WILL be dirty and smell. I stopped worrying about that the second year. All clean clothes get packed in individual ziploc bags, I give her a laundry bag for all dirty clothes and just take everything from her the second it gets home and wash everything really good.

Last year my DD went to a one week camp for fashion, and then two weeks later went back to the same camp for a ten day horse camp. It is important to send them letters and whatever from home. (even if its small dollar store items every day they know you're thinking about them.)

She would love to a whole summer camp but we can't afford it and she has baton lessons all summer (with competitions that start in August so it's either drop her team or go to camp. Even now they complain when she misses a couple practices for the one week camps)

 

[disneymom3]

I suppose it depends on the kids, but 7 seems waaaayyy to young to me. Reading the title of your post, my first thought was, "Nope, can't do that." (Tell you not to worry.) What harm is there in letting her just wait a couple of years. Once she is grown up and independent she is grown up and independent forever. Why rush it? A week is a really long time for a 7 yo if you ask me.

 

[Jynohn]

When I was growing up some of my friends went away to camp all summer and I remember being sooo jealous. They always came back with such great stories, new friends, etc. that I could never be a part of. I went to camp too, but it was always day camp, or just week-long Girl Scout camp, and it was never the same. I remember watching shows like "Bug Juice" or the "Parent Trap" even as an adult and wishing that I had gone away to camp.

By the time we were financially able to send my son to sleep away camp, he was 11 and already at the age where he was afraid to try new things away from his friends. He was also concerned that many of the campers would have already been going for years and knew each other well and he would be the "new kid." He decided he didn't want to go.

My daughter is 6 now, and while I think she won't be old enough to go for at least a few more years, there's also a fine line between "not old enough" and "too old" to want to try new things. I just wish I knew what that line was. I'm thinking maybe 9 or so?

I think many parents get a bad rap for "shipping their kids off" for the summer, when in reality, my own greatest regret as a kid is that I didn't get to go to sleep away camp.

 

[MrsPete]

I was homesick instantly and they wouldn't call my parents - I was literally throwing up.

I ended up going to camp again when I was 12, and it was much better (a different camp!).

Has your child ever slept over at a friends house? If so - how many nights in a row?

I'm sorry you were so very homesick! Once a child's in that position, there's no good option. Calling home always makes things worse instead of better. Letting the child leave camp early registers in her mind as "you failed". Doing nothing can result in never wanting to go again. The right choice is avoiding sending the child too soon!

I doubt the other camp was different; in all probability, YOU were more mature by that point! You were five years older, and that's a world of difference for a child.

Having slept over at friends' houses without any difficulty is a good measure of camp-readiness; however, camp can be different: you're throwing in the wilderness factor too.

 

[dianengeorgia]

If there is any doubt your DD is ready, then she is not. I wouldn't let my 7 year old spend the night away from home without knowing the other child and parents very well, much less attend overnight camp unless I was a chaperone.

 

[RoyalCanadian]

First, some context -- I'm a Lutheran minister, the chairman of the board of a camp and I serve as the camp pastor for one week each summer. DD has spent at least one day at camp each summer since she was born. Last summer she attended the day camp programme at the camp and was supposed to spend the evenings with me. That said, she made friends in one of the "sleep-over" cabins at the campfire the first night and spent as much time with them as she could during the evenings -- although she did sleep in the camp pastor's residence with me each night.

DD is now 6 years old and is eager to try her hand at staying all week in one of the cabins with other campers and the counsellors. She will be at camp during the week I'm the camp pastor. Her cabin will be less than 100 meters from mine. We're going to give it a try, even if it means the counsellors have to come get me in the middle of the night. I don't think that's going to happen.

DD really came into her own last summer during the day camp programme. The day campers get to try all the activities that "regular" campers try -- archery, canoing, swimming, art & crafts, creek wades, and the low ropes course. I was surprised to she her excelling at new activities that I would never have dreamed of trying when I was 5 years old -- and things that my parents probably wouldn't have let me try either.

Most camps are very choosey in who they hire to work with the campers. I know that camps in Ontario are heavily regulated by the camp accreditation association. This means anything from requiring a letter from the applicants local Familyl & Children's Services office to a full-blown police record check. (In Canada police record checks for minors are fairly well useless -- if they have a police record, the police can't tell you about it and the police records of minors are sealed at age 18, so the police record check of an adult who committed crimes as a minor won't turn up anything either. FACS checks are not so forgiving.) We also require a letter of reference from an applicant's pastor and other references. Many of our staff have grown up at our camp; they have been trained at our camp and we know who they are.

The OP is the only one who can make the decision in her own daughter's situation -- but I would wholeheartedly support the chance for her daughter to spend some time away at camp. Our camp has a beginner's programme in which the children spend 1/2 the week at camp -- nice to see if the child will enjoy the experience.

Summer camp is a great place for memories to grow, lifelong friendships to be cultivated and new skills to be discovered.

 

[SuzieQMomof3]

Dear fac,

No one should ever tell another mother not to worry. This is your daughter, your responsibility, your decision.

Please, please, please read the book "Protecting the Gift" by Gavin de Becker.

Ask yourself, is she really going to be scarred for life because she wasn't allowed to go to sleep-away camp at the age of 8? Listen to your intuition.

Good luck with your decision.