OT: Potty Training Support Thread!

[Nom]

Don't know if anyone else is dealing with potty training after the holidays, but we have decided that it is time to begin so I thought I would start a thread to support one another and to add any advice or tips.

You may remember me: I have a smart but stubborn daughter who likes to get her own way. She turned 3 in Oct and shows no interest in potty training, although if I put her on the potty first thing in the morning she will pee. Tried sticker charts, money and other 'bribes' and she was excited at first but lost interest.

Well, yesterday dh and I got invited to a birthday party, adults-only, and she wanted to go (she is very fascinated by adults only places). So I told her if she is potty trained by Jan 19th, she can go to the party. So now finally she is interested in potty training! Hurrah! (if this actually works I will throw another party for this guy, and say it is the adults only party, if I have to!!)

So today is day one... she wore panties this morning, went on the potty... but pooped in the panties. So I reminded her again the rules of panties (tell someone you have to go before you go), and she repeated them back... then she pooped again in her panties. Repeated the rules again... then she peed in the panties.

In between all this she has been on the potty trying to go... so there has been more co-operation and interest in the potty then ever before. So this is good, and even with the accidents we are continuing to move forward...

So tell me, will it get better? Will she catch on and really start telling me when she has to go? I am losing a little enthusiasm, but I don't want to give up yet. Any ideas of things I should be doing differently? Tonight we are going out to dinner, and I am a little nervous about an accident in public, but I will continue to soldier on!

 

[jazzmine]

Hello! New here but I can related to potty training woes. My DS will be three next month and we have tried many things to motivate him as well. I don't want to be pushy with it but I would also like it to happen before TOO long.

DS will sit on the potty (only if asked though) and will occasionally pee. We thought if we gave him a taste of what the good life was like, wearing Buzz Lightyear underpants, it would motivate him for next time. However both times we have done this, he's peed in THEM (even though he just went on the potty). Sigh.

Just wanted to commiserate. Good luck tonight, hope that it goes well for you and no accidents!!!

 

[bushdianee]

I am helping to potty train my 2yo DNiece. Her Mom took a week's vacation this week to get her trained. I haven't seen her since Tuesday so I don't know how she is doing. I had her Monday night and part of the day Tuedsay and we had 2 accidents and about 5 successes . We have been introducing Shayla to the potty for several months. Actually I've had more successes with her than her parents. We have the potty chair that looks like a throne and plays music if "something" hits the sensors. She loves that. We praise her a lot. She also loves watching the "Elmo's Potty Time" video and watches it almost every time she is at my house (3-4 evenings a week) Right now it is more of figuring out her schedule and hitting the right times but she has started telling us when she needs to go poop. When she is all potty trained I want to take her to WDW. She just turned 2 last month so she doesn't understand that yet. I keep telling her that if she is a good girl and goes on the potty then I will take her to see "the Mouse" as she calls Mickey and Minnie! Good luck with your daughter.

 

[Not so Dumbo]

I've had the most luck when I make it very clear to them that diapers aren't an option anymore. I make a big deal of getting rid of them and usually they have a tempertantrum over it and then it sinks in that they have to use the potty or going in their underpants(with rubber pants over them) isn't the same as going in their diapers and it feels yucky. From then on they catch on really quickly. Ofcourse you have to make sure that they are really ready to potty train and that they are mature enough to comprehend it.
Good luck. I'm giving some serious thought to potty training DD soon. I'm a little bit nervous because she is quite a bit younger than her brothers were, but she is showing a lot of signs that she's ready. So wish me luck too.

 

[SharpMomOfTwo]

We have been potty training DD since Thanksgiving week - she will be 3 the beginning of next month. I'm sorry to say for some of you as well as myself, but I think part of the problem is that you started to late (not to say that they will be going to college in diapers, because they wont!). Someone once told me that starting in the early 2's is the time to start because at that age they really want to please Mommy and Daddy. By the time 3 comes along, your just annoying them!
I'm happy to say that DD has never had an accident, but we have had our whows. First, she wouldn't poop in the little Dora potty... made herself sick for days at a time, yelled and cried that her tummy and hiney hurt... finally we gave in and told her to do it in her pull-ups. Finally after another set of several days... she regulated herself again, and after a week or so, we told her she had to do it in the Dora potty. She finally did! Now after all this time of her having no problem going on public pottys and our big-girl potty at home, she freeked out, screaming and thrashing around when she came within a 10 foot radius of one! I know what the problem is - she gets scared on the pubic pottys that flush automatically - and now I know how to combat it - put a stick-it note over the scencor to stop it. After days of fighting with her to go on, we just gave up, and I'm now happy to say she will go on one again, but I have yet to try public ones.... don't know how the mall trips are going to go, but she always seems to be able to hold it for the 5 hours were out dispite how many times I ask her if she wants to go. Now its the poopie again - she wont poop on the big potty. Its been 3 days now, no poopie! I finally just brought the Dora potty down again, and she sat on it, but nothing be peepee. So the conclusion I've come to, is just stay calm, don't freek out, and if they freek out like mine did on the Big-Girl potty, just pick them up, take them home, and console yourself with the knowledge that they will not be going to college in a diaper!

 

[chiefdragon]

DH and I are in the process of potty training DD 2...I was at a friends house last night with DD and she kept saying she had to go potty, but didn't want to use it because she was afraid of falling in...so I just sat her backwards on the potty...it was a pain, becuase we had to take off her pants and underware, but she went and was so proud of herself. We did make a huge deal of getting rid of the diapers and told her that they were being given away to a family friend who has a baby and she was no longer a baby, but a big girl.

It has only been 2 1/2 days, but she only had 6 accidents (which is not bad, considering that we didn't really make any transition, but went right for the potty.) DH and my goal is to take her to a place called Expos on Sunday (kind of like Chucky Cheese, but geared more to toddlers) if she has done a really good job.

 

[bigbabyblues]

I'm NOT with you, but I just want to tell you guys it WILL get better!!!

My boys were both 3 before they were potty trained. It was definitely easier to get them to go pee in the potty, but they'll get there eventually. Just keep at it, don't give up, and try to stay patient. I've been there, I know it's not easy, but this too will pass!

Also, not all kids are ready at the same time. I disagree with the poster who said age 2 is the time to start. I know there are a lot of kids who will at that age, but there are also a lot that won't. I don't know if it's a boy/girl thing partly, or what, but neither of mine would sit still long enough at 2!!!

Good luck to all, you have my support and sympathy!!!

Steph

 

[K8T]

Hi and best of luck!

This is a subject that was very close to me not so long ago and boy do I understand your concerns!!

I can't tell you what is right or wrong, only my experience and observations of my dd who is now three and 4 months.

Basically a week after her 2nd Birthday, I decided to 'go for it' and I do think there is something to be said for doing it earlier rather than later, a couple of friends left it late and had problems, one done it even earlier and has been OK, but there does seem to be a 'best time' just after the second birthday. I think too, from speaking to others, that boys are a bit slower in general to be able to 'feel' when to go.

However, we did a lot of preparation, reading books, talking about peeing and pooing (isn't it lovely!!), letting her see us use the toilet!!! Generally had the potty around and occassionally she sat on it.

A friend of mine said stickers were great, but use whatever the highest reward would be for your child and that was probably the best advice I ever had, so I started with Chocolate buttons (yes I know they aren't great, but it did the trick and once we had the routine established, we stopped them),

Well it took two days and that was it, completely dry! Having been building up to it and taking four days off work to do the job, I was amazed!

I put pretty pants on her in the morning, with a picture, and said we didn't want to get them wet did we and had the potty in which ever room we were in. Every now and then she would ask to sit on the potty and I would make a huge fuss of how clever she was, but she didn't actually 'do' anything, I tried not to keep asking her to use it herself, then one time she sat on it and got up and looked shocked! She had peed, well we had a party!! Sticker, chocolate button and big fuss, danced around the room!

Later in the day she peed on the chair, but I didn't say much, just what a shame it wasn't in the potty, as she would have had a sweet - I think we had two accidents the first day, and one the second, that was it.

OK, occassionally she leaves it too long and we get the occassional mishap, but generally is fine.

I think the key thing was, keep the potty nearby, have a really good reward. Keep an eye on what she is doing and try and read when she may 'go', but don't keep pestering her.

There is a really good potty training book by Gina Ford, which has a lot of excellent advice in it, I am sure you will find it on Amazon.

Best of luck, as long as you get more in the pot than on the floor, you are doing OK!

Kate

P.S. At first I still used Pull Ups in the car in case I couldn't stop, or she fell asleep, but they didn't work for us when doing the training.

 

[labst60]

I was at wits-end with DD (will be 3 in March).
I felt like I had tried EVERYTHING and planned on doing the "stay at home until it is done" approach in January. We would have periods of her being willing to go if we put her on the potty, but truthfully - it was more training ME than HER!

THen -about 10 days ago, she announced she needed to pee pee on the potty - and she went! We have had 3 accidents in the first 4-5 days and NONE since then (even overnight!!!!) ANd I have been making a point to **not** ask her too often- because it has to come from her.

She is VERY headstrong and somewhat defiant - even at 2.5, she has very little interest in doing something "to make mommy happy."

I didn't believe it - but I guess its true - when they are "ready" they'll do it.

Hang in there and good luck!!

 

[grlpwrd]

We have been potty training DD since Thanksgiving week - she will be 3 the beginning of next month. I'm sorry to say for some of you as well as myself, but I think part of the problem is that you started to late (not to say that they will be going to college in diapers, because they wont!). Someone once told me that starting in the early 2's is the time to start because at that age they really want to please Mommy and Daddy. By the time 3 comes along, your just annoying them!
I'm happy to say that DD has never had an accident, but we have had our whows. First, she wouldn't poop in the little Dora potty... made herself sick for days at a time, yelled and cried that her tummy and hiney hurt... finally we gave in and told her to do it in her pull-ups. Finally after another set of several days... she regulated herself again, and after a week or so, we told her she had to do it in the Dora potty. She finally did! Now after all this time of her having no problem going on public pottys and our big-girl potty at home, she freeked out, screaming and thrashing around when she came within a 10 foot radius of one! I know what the problem is - she gets scared on the pubic pottys that flush automatically - and now I know how to combat it - put a stick-it note over the scencor to stop it. After days of fighting with her to go on, we just gave up, and I'm now happy to say she will go on one again, but I have yet to try public ones.... don't know how the mall trips are going to go, but she always seems to be able to hold it for the 5 hours were out dispite how many times I ask her if she wants to go. Now its the poopie again - she wont poop on the big potty. Its been 3 days now, no poopie! I finally just brought the Dora potty down again, and she sat on it, but nothing be peepee. So the conclusion I've come to, is just stay calm, don't freek out, and if they freek out like mine did on the Big-Girl potty, just pick them up, take them home, and console yourself with the knowledge that they will not be going to college in a diaper!

I don't agree that the early 2's is the best time to start because I have 5 kids who all started earlier or even later than that. When they were ready, then they were ready. lol Also, there are parents who use elimination communication with their babies so PT can happen even younger.

I think the biggest factors that helped them along was the fact they used cloth diapers and that they used the toilet insert that fit on top. They all learned at their own pace sometimes in different ways. You can beg, you can plead, but what has worked for all my kids is answering the question, what's in it for me? lol

My now 16yo dd was about a year old when she started and she was fully PT at around 16 months old. She was always this way and in fact she scooted rather than crawled. I just bought a toilet insert and she learned by example.

My now 9yo and 13yo were about 2 when they were potty trained. I used the same technique. I really had to wait until they were ready. If they soiled their undies, then they had to help clean it up. They got to see how their big sister which helped. We made it a big event - clapping and even planning a simple goodbye diapers party. lol

My 4yo son has been PT for the past year. Now he was a challenge. lol I had to wait until he was really ready. He wears cloth undies with characters on them and took him to the playground of his choice as a reward. I bought books and he saw videos.... we tried everything else with him. ugh lol j/k... He stays dry even over night.

I am PT my 2.5 yo and she is coming along well.

GL!

 

[kristenrice]

Our DD4 sounds like your little one. We tried starting her PT after she turned 2 but it took FOREVER! She never cared about having a dirty or wet diaper as an infant so dirty/wet panties/pullups were no big deal either. Once she learned how to use the potty seat, she would only use it if getting up to go would fit into her hectic playtime schedule It was then that we decided that we had to not only reward her for going in the potty, but, at age 3, she was due for a little "negative reinforcement". Everytime she would poop in her panties, she would have to go into the bathroom and stand in the bathtub while she got cleaned up with COLD water. Now, let me clarify, this came about only AFTER she knew how to use the toilet. The "punishment" was because she knew how to use the potty by then, she just chose not too. The water we washed her off with wasn't ice water, it was just cool enough to be unpleasant, and the wash-off was only long enough to get her clean. She wasn't forced to sit and soak in it or anything . Since the sensation of poopy panties was not enough of an unpleasant motivator to use the potty seat, the "cold tubby" became the proxy. It worked. After her first few "accidents", she would approach and just say, "I don't want a cold tubby." Then and there we knew that she'd pooped her panties. Pretty soon, she went in the potty every time.

Now, our youngest DD (27 months) is just learning to use her new potty seat. Today was like someone flipped a switch on her! She woke up and DH put her in a pull-up for church. When they got home (I was home sick ) she said she had to go potty. DH took her to her potty seat and she went! He noticed that her pull-up was barely wet so he put her in regular underwear. She has only worn regular panties for one day before, and we went through 5 pairs! Today, she told us EVERY TIME when she had to go potty and successfully used the potty seat each time! We put her in a pull-up for her nap (since she napped in our bed with me) and she stayed dry for 2 1/2 hours. She woke up from her nap, sat up and said she had to go potty. She walked into the bathroom, sat on her potty seat and went! I couldn't believe it! I cannot believe that she could possibly learn to use the toilet (potty seat) THAT quickly! Now, I don't know what to do about our upcoming trip. We leave in less than 3 weeks for WDW and I don't want her to regress. On the other hand, I don't want to be sprinting for bathrooms and losing my place in lines either. I'm planning on having her in pull-ups just in case of any accidents.

 

[Nom]

Well, here is my update over the weekend: Sat morning, we had one poop and one pee in the panties. Then, no accidents... and plenty of successes! She peeded when we were out at TGI Fridays, she told me she had to pee for the first time ever, she went into the bathroom and took off her panties and did everything all herself, she woke up this am and went right in to pee... so lots of awesome progress. Last night I thought we were home free! But then we had an accident this morning. So, we are still working on:

1. Poop- there has been no poop since her accident sat morning. She has a history of constipation so I am a little nervous about it. She almost pooped sun morning- I saw the little poop peeking out- but for whatever reason she would not push it out. So frustrating! So I will see what happens. I am a little nervous that she will make herself sick, we'll see.

2. Trusting mommy intuition- every time she has had an accident, I had seen her seeming like she had to go about 15 min prior. I asked her if she had to go, and she said no... and then had an accident. So I have to learn that if I think she looks like she has to go, she needs to try on the potty right then and there.

Hello! New here but I can related to potty training woes. My DS will be three next month and we have tried many things to motivate him as well. I don't want to be pushy with it but I would also like it to happen before TOO long.

DS will sit on the potty (only if asked though) and will occasionally pee. We thought if we gave him a taste of what the good life was like, wearing Buzz Lightyear underpants, it would motivate him for next time. However both times we have done this, he's peed in THEM (even though he just went on the potty). Sigh.

Wow, that was totally me before this adult party thing came up. I wish I had started sooner, but thankfully that adult party thing was enough incentive for her to start training and now that the ball is rolling she is into it.

 

[Nom]

UPDATE: We have poop in the potty! Hooray!

But not without another pee accident, just moments after 'trying' on the potty unsuccessfully.

I guess it's one step back, two steps forward with this process.

 

[Veals_Family]

My daughter, just turned 3 yesterday, decided that this past thursday, the 3rd of January was the day she would pee in the toliet when she sat, rather than sit and then say she was done right away. Now, Stella is very well, SET IN HER OWN WAY! Ever since thursday, she has been doing fairly well, she is in a pull up at home and panties at Day Care. Every time she pee pees in the toliet at home she gets a glow in the dark plastic star to hang by fishing wire from her ceiling. So far it's worked. She does have a few accidents, but I'm really not sure if she understands WHEN she needs to go. We have a potty timer that goes off about every 35-45 minutes. And for the most part she pees everytime. I swear she makes more urine than the average child.
I honestly thought this day would NEVER come. I just wouldn't let myself realize it had to be up to her!

Now I just need a travel potty seat for our trip next week!?!?!

 

[grlpwrd]

Nom, congrats to your dd!

My daughter, just turned 3 yesterday, decided that this past thursday, the 3rd of January was the day she would pee in the toliet when she sat, rather than sit and then say she was done right away. Now, Stella is very well, SET IN HER OWN WAY! Ever since thursday, she has been doing fairly well, she is in a pull up at home and panties at Day Care. Every time she pee pees in the toliet at home she gets a glow in the dark plastic star to hang by fishing wire from her ceiling. So far it's worked. She does have a few accidents, but I'm really not sure if she understands WHEN she needs to go. We have a potty timer that goes off about every 35-45 minutes. And for the most part she pees everytime. I swear she makes more urine than the average child.
I honestly thought this day would NEVER come. I just wouldn't let myself realize it had to be up to her!

Now I just need a travel potty seat for our trip next week!?!?!

We have a Fisher Price travel potty and I keep it in the car. I upgraded from a smaller one, but this FP works wonderfully. I think this is why my 4yo son had such an easier time with his PT and why my 2.5 yo is coming along with it, too. lol..GL!

 

[jazzmine]

Congrats Nom! Sounds like things are coming together with your DD!

I have to admit, my DH is much more disciplined with asking DS about going to the potty and pushing it. If DS says he doesn't want to try, I take his word for it. I think that I'm going to have to be a bit more forceful about this! He loves being rewarded for going on the potty but it's actually getting him there that's a bit of a pain.

 

[Nom]

Yes, I have learned the hard way that I can't take her word for it (yet)- if I feel like she might need to go, I have to make her try.

She does well with no pee accidents at home, but at her ma's house (my mom watches her during the day when I am at work), she had two pee accidents yesterday, so there is a disconnect there. However, ma's house is where she did the poop in the potty. So I have to figure out what ma is doing differently than what we are doing at home.

My plan had been to try her on the potty every 2 hours, or if she does not go after 2 hours, then every hour. Her pull ups stay pretty dry throughout the day, that was why I started with this timing. What is everyone else's input- how often did you put them on the potty at the beginning?

 

[Nom]

I also added a poll (my first one)- because I am curious how long after you started training could you really depend on the fact that your dc was trained? I could see how this constant watching and going to the potty every hour could get tiring after a while!

 

[dyna]

TO FUNNY about the poll.....

I once had a friend ask me HOW LONG IT TOOK TO PT? I said minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years depending on the kid she said YEARS??? I said yes years. Guess what for her it was YEARS her son wore pull ups to kindergarten an 1st grade often came home wet.

 

[OlderMan]

When my younger DD was about 3.5, DW asked her. "When will you start using the potty?"

DD replied, "Thursday!"

DW said, "Today's Thursday."

DD said, "OK."

She had an accident or two, but that was it!