Sadly my diagnosis suggestion was one of experience. I mistyped before... i meant to say "sounds more like RAD to me". Any parent of a rad child will tell you they are often misdiagnosed for YEARS. So yes i did point that it might not be odd. One specific child i know was disgnosed at age 5 bipolar, adhd, with ODD. when in reality.....she had RAD. she went through years of incorrect treatment and unfortunately once the correct diagnosis was made it was too late for successfull treatment. My suggestion was not to discredit or insult, but was to prevent the heartache many adoptive families have had due to just not knowing about RAD. I still encourage you to seek support from the group i listed, especially since RAD kids are very much odd. (and you would not be looked at as a "bad mom", who's child would be fixed with a good spanking....:::eye roll::
Here is what RAD is.....How many symptoms are innerchangeable....(yes this can happen prenatally)
Children with reactive attachment disorder can be divided into four categories:
The Ambivalent Children
Are angry, defiant & can be violent.
Will push affection away to keep control
Are destructive both with their own belonging and others
Are extremely difficult children to parent because they sabotage or destroy almost everything positive that happens to them.
When they want something, they act very affectionate.
Have few friends if any, although they will say they do, listing several acquaintances keep friends only for a short time
Lack the ability to give and receive love
Lack empathy for others often cruel to animals and other children.
The Anxious Children
Tend to be overly clingy, showing extreme separation anxiety when separated from their mothers.
Incessantly chatters to control conversation
Appear to be eager to please and are superficially compliant.
Are often passive aggressive, constantly doing little things wrong, but never doing anything really bad, but frazzling the parents patience and control.
Usually recover faster than those in the other categories
The Avoidance Children
Are often overlooked as they are very compliant, agreeable & superficially engaging,
Lack depth to their emotions & functions robotic like, not genuine or real in emotional engagement.
Dont enjoy being around others because they don't feel safe.
Are Omnipotent believing that they can care for all their own needs by themselves, and do not need others, especially their mothers.
Are sullen and openly oppositional, but mostly in a passive aggressive way.
The Disorganized Children
Have highly disorganized behaviour and a bizarre showing a variety of symptoms.
Hide anger deep inside, they are easier to deal with, harder to treat.
May have atypical psychosis, bipolar disorder, and other neurological disorders.
Often will have mental illness in the family history.
Are excessively excitable (other RAD children are usually moody.)
Are most difficult to treat in therapy because they have so many different problems and often require medication and out-of-home care.
Other Signs & Symptoms
Signs of Reactive Attachment Disorder in infants may include: weak crying response, rage, constant whining, sensitivity to touch and cuddling, poor suckling response and eye contact, and no reciprocal smile response.
Reactive Attachment Disorder Children may also have these symptoms: lack of conscience development, lack of eye contact except when lying, will not give or receive affection (hugs & kisses), no impulse control, abnormal eating patterns (gorging, hoarding, etc.), constantly making noise of some kind, pacing, and unusual speech patterns (mumbling, robotic, talking softly).
RAD can and has been misdiagnosed as Bipolar disorder, Attention Deficit Disorder, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, Anti-Social Personality Disorder and Conduct Disorder.
Read more at Suite101: Reactive Attachment Disorder: RAD Signs, Symptoms & Causes
http://personalitydisorders.suite101.com/article.cfm/reactive_attachment_disorder#ixzz0g1f95Hjy
Best wishes, This sure isnt an easy road!
. I know how hard it is to deal with these issues.
