OT-bedroom help

[Mouse House Mama]

My sister took DD and I 2 weeks ago for my birthday. The kids did not go, nor did my husband because my mom and sister paid for everything. Me, my DH and the kids will be going in the spring. The kids think it is June but I cleared it with their mom to take them out of school so we are going in April.
ETA: when we got back last week and I told the kids about our trip, they were kind of glad they did not go along BUT they are also very glad that we had a 'practice trip' to make the next trip even better/easier.

Do you really expect us to believe that an 8 year old and 13 year old were happy that you got to go to WDW without them to "practice?" That is the funniest and saddest thing I have heard all week.
Also- isn't your sister young?

 

[Magic Mom]

Do you really expect us to believe that an 8 year old and 13 year old were happy that you got to go to WDW without them to "practice?" That is the funniest and saddest thing I have heard all week.
Also- isn't your sister young?

I must have missed that. You're right, that is funny!

 

[KateMW]

Me or the OP? Because my question might have been blunt, but it wasn't unkind.

You cut out of the part of the quote where she mentioned she was talking to the OP. Why?

 

[BellesMom72]

You cut out of the part of the quote where she mentioned she was talking to the OP. Why?

Merrywind edited the orig. posters name into the post at a later time.

It wasn't their at the start.

 

[KateMW]

Merrywind edited the orig. posters name into the post at a later time.

It wasn't their at the start.

Well then, that makes sense, now doesn't it.

 

[Merriwind]

Merrywind edited the orig. posters name into the post at a later time.

It wasn't their at the start.

Yes, when Magic Mom asked whom I was referring to, I thought I should edit my post to be more clear. I definitely wanted my post directed at the OP, no one else. Sorry for any confusion.

I keep checking back, hoping the OP posts "just kidding" or "after a good night's sleep, I realize that having the two little ones share is best for everyone" or something like that. Poor 13yo, OP was considering putting him on the couch, in a closet, or in the basement? Who knows where he'll end up? Poor kids, being treated like 2nd (or lower) class citizens by their stepmother.

 

[doxdogy]

OP I am really curious if your husband notices your obvious resentment of his kids? If they are such a burden, then why in the world did you marry him? Did you honestly think they would mysteriously just go away? I tell people that I inherited my daughter when I married her father and I have never referred to her as my DSS. In fact, the term step drives me up a tree. She became my daughter when I married her father.

 

[iheartnmr's]

On her post on THEBUMP she essentially says she's counting the days until her oldest stepchild doesn't come to visit anymore. She assumes it's at the age 18. I guess he won't be welcome at her house once he goes off to college anymore.

la79al Joined on 07-12-2007 1,235 Posts 27,449 Points That's what I was thinking too. Unfortunetly. Not trying to make it a step versus bio issue but I'm kind of upset that the kids that only call this house home won't even have their own rooms while the kids that don't even consider this house one of their homes each get a room all to themselves. I guess the only other option is to wait to TTC until the oldest doesn't come anymore.

 

[hsmamato2]

IMO- give the teen the smallest bedroom- teens don't need as much space as smaller kids,and they DO need some private space- put the dsd in the next smallest room,and the babies together,or the bigger baby and dsd together,and then new baby gets the smallest room.
Or I 've seen homes where Mom and Dad take the tiny bedroom,and give more space to the kids and their toys

 

[hsmamato2]

sorry I posted before I read the whole thread Op you have issues with your stepkids. I feel bad for your entire family. where they sleep is only one issue you all seem to have.
Allowance money being spent in silly ways by CHILDREN?!?! shocking....CHILDREN not being able to see a bigger picture of using money for a long off in the future trip you've promised? wow, like that's so unusual......
A father who isn't willing to pay for HIS OWN children to go on a vacation with his all new family?!?!?! what kind of parent doesn't pay for their kids trips? I don't care about "money from their mom",this is vacation with Dad and his new family- he should pay!!!
BTW< this is going to affect not just your stepkids adversely,but also your relationship with your dh,and even your own new babes,when they're old enough to understand what is happening. all around bad.

 

[princess pooh]

On her post on THEBUMP she essentially says she's counting the days until her oldest stepchild doesn't come to visit anymore. She assumes it's at the age 18. I guess he won't be welcome at her house once he goes off to college anymore.

la79al Joined on 07-12-2007 1,235 Posts 27,449 Points That's what I was thinking too. Unfortunetly. Not trying to make it a step versus bio issue but I'm kind of upset that the kids that only call this house home won't even have their own rooms while the kids that don't even consider this house one of their homes each get a room all to themselves. I guess the only other option is to wait to TTC until the oldest doesn't come anymore.

OMG

What a pathetic excuse for a stepmom you are. My heart breaks for those poor children.

 

[Nancyg56]

Do you really expect us to believe that an 8 year old and 13 year old were happy that you got to go to WDW without them to "practice?" That is the funniest and saddest thing I have heard all week.

I remember the ice cream thread and thought that that was one of the saddest things I had heard. I was wrong.

On her post on THEBUMP she essentially says she's counting the days until her oldest stepchild doesn't come to visit anymore. She assumes it's at the age 18. I guess he won't be welcome at her house once he goes off to college anymore.

Those poor children. I really think that sleeping arrangements are the least of the kids worries. I cannot imagine not being wanted.

 

[monsterkitty]

I'm a step-daughter who was treated much the same way as you are treating your step-children. For Christmas my sister and I would get a pair of gloves while my step-sibbling would get televisions with game systems and vcrs. The older ones got microwaves and Vegas trips. You know, small things like that. When staying with my dad's new family, my sister and I would get the couch and the love seat, even though there were other rooms with empty beds. We didn't get the beds because step-mom would save those for the older kids in case they came home from college for the weekend.

We grew resentful, and in turn did just as the OP hopes her step-kids will do - decide not to visit their dad. To this day we call our step"mom" our wicked step-monster.

OP, before you assign rooms or couches to all of the children, you need to decide what you want your step-children to call you and remember you as.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Yes, when Magic Mom asked whom I was referring to, I thought I should edit my post to be more clear. I definitely wanted my post directed at the OP, no one else. Sorry for any confusion.

I keep checking back, hoping the OP posts "just kidding" or "after a good night's sleep, I realize that having the two little ones share is best for everyone" or something like that. Poor 13yo, OP was considering putting him on the couch, in a closet, or in the basement? Who knows where he'll end up? Poor kids, being treated like 2nd (or lower) class citizens by their stepmother.

I doubt she is kidding at all after all I have read here. Maybe she isn't back because she is fixing up the shed for the step kids. How horrible for these poor children. Not only the step children but for all involved because what kind of father would allow this kind of treatment? Beyond sad.

 

[Squeasel]

Wow! This thread made me sad before, but with all this back story popping up, I really feel for your step-kids now. I sounds like you really, really resent them and every dime spent on them, even when it's their own money. They are your kids too! They did not ask for their mom and dad to divorce, they did not ask to be shoved from one house to another, they did not ask for their dad to marry a new mom who appears to not like them and treat them well, they did not ask for new siblings to replace them in their dads house. And while it's bad enough you're doing this to them, their own dad is letting it happen to them!

Every kid deserves parents who love them, and a place where they feel safe and secure. I'll take them, and love them as much as my own child. They would be treated equal and well loved here. This makes me sick.

 

[lifenthetropics]

My sister took DD and I 2 weeks ago for my birthday. The kids did not go, nor did my husband because my mom and sister paid for everything. Me, my DH and the kids will be going in the spring. The kids think it is June but I cleared it with their mom to take them out of school so we are going in April.
ETA: when we got back last week and I told the kids about our trip, they were kind of glad they did not go along BUT they are also very glad that we had a 'practice trip' to make the next trip even better/easier.

Hmmm


12-10-2009, 03:12 PM #1
la79al
DIS Veteran


Join Date: May 2005
Location: PA
Posts: 1,399

How much cash?

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My mom, sis, DD and I are headed to DW on Sunday for 5 days. We will have the regular DDP and most likely, I will only be responsible for myself and DD. I will be taking the credit card but how much actual cash should I take along?
__________________
DD 19 months DSD 8 DSS 13


Did your sister renege on the deal?

 

[darlak]

The obvious solution here is to do anything BUT what you're proposing. Either put the 2 little ones is a room together or the toddler in the room with the stepdaughter. The one solution that should not even be considered is making the teenage boy sleep on the couch and not have his own room. Especially if that child spends half of his time in your home. Teenagers need their own private space. Please don't take that away from this child.

This is a child, forget the fact that he's your stepchild. He deserves to be loved and protected by the adults in his life. Your resentment of him and his sister is apparent in your posts. Do you think they don't see it? Do you really think they aren't hurt by it? As your birth children grow older, make no mistake, they will see it too. If for no other reason that the message it will send to them, I would think you might want to step back and reevaluate your actions toward your stepchildren.

My heart breaks for those two children, especially because I know your's doesn't.

 

[Sgstuckey]

This thread makes me appreciate my own family! My husband is "technically" my oldest daughter's step-father. I have never, ever heard him refer to her that way-ever! I have never heard her call him her step-father. My daughters do not consider each other step-sisters either; they are sisters.

Evidently, I am truly blessed. Although, I would never have married him (or stayed married to him) if he treated my daughter (I should really say "our" daughter.) as anything other than his own!

 

[Magic Mom]

Do you think they don't see it? Do you really think they aren't hurt by it? .

From all her posts, I don't think she really cares.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

From all her posts, I don't think she really cares.

I think you have hit the nail on the head unfortunately.