Opinions please...

[goofyintoronto]

Absolutely no way should the other kid/his parents be asked to pay. I might feel differently if the other kid was being malicious or the breaking was deliberate but for an accident no. As you (OP) said your son should not have let anyone else use his phone and this was a prime example of the consequences that occur when you do.

I would investigate avenues for repair..see if you can get it done through Apple free, different repair shops, replacing it yourself (my friend did that with his although he is pretty talented in regards to electronics and such) and so on. I don't blame you for not running out and fixing it because of the actions that led to the break (him lending it to someone) but I would set up a means for my child to "earn" the money either through household activities/acts, charitable acts or if he has a job by giving so much of his paycheck towards repair (as again I am assuming a 14+ year old here). If you want to offer to do it up front and he has to pay you back that could work too. You are not out of line in asking him to be responsible in some manner for the repairs.

Sorry i didnt read the rest of the posts, but I agree with Cornflake. I wouldnt ask the other parents to pay. it was your son's responsibility. Maybe now he will learn right? As for repairs, i've had many friends shatter their iphone screen. Fixing it thru apple would cost about $200 (canadian), but there are tons of stores in our area that we found would replace the screen for only $30-$40. So i would highly suggest you avoid going thru apple, totally unneccessary expense. Im sure you will find it cheaper elsewhere. Or as cornflake suggested, try doing it yourself. im sure there are how-to videos on youtube. Having said that, I would look to get the screen replaced and let the son work off the cost by doing chores.

 

[Styx Fan]

I wouldn't ask the other parents to pay either....but I would be tempted to make sure they at least knew. I doubt if their kid told them what happened. I would want to know what happened and would use it to teach my kid not to borrow expensive stuff. We really do teach our kids to share, then turn around and be dissatisfied if they do. I would then offer to split the cost of repair.

But then, I am not really into buying kids expensive electronic toys and especially not letting them take them to school. When Grandma bought my 13 year old an I-touch, he knew good and well he was not supposed to take it to school. It could be stolen or broken. And if that happened there was no way I was replacing it. Nor would grandma. He was told I thought this was a total luxury and he wasn't old enough to carry around something so expensive. He choose to ask for it anyway, despite my objections. I didn't mind grandma buying it as she wanted to and understood the risks....my job to be the parent, her job to spoil him.

 

[Hoodie]

Hello all,

Just curious how some might handle this situation. My DS had his iphone in school and let another kid use it to listen to music. Of course the other kid dropped it and shattered the screen.

The phone still works but all smashed up. Repair cost is $150.00. Other kid feels bad but says his Dad wont pay to fix it. My DS wants me to call the parents and ask them to pay.

Although I am mad about situation, I think my son should have not let anyone else use his phone and he is responsible. I refuse to pay to fix it.

The kids in his school are allowed to use their phones for study period/flex time so he wasnt doing anything he wasnt supposed to in school.
DS is mad, said it could be a Christmas present but no way. His presents are all bought.
WWYD?

R-

I'd probably do exactly what you are. If he really wants/needs money to get it fixed, he can earn it.

 

[Wishing on a star]

If I thought that there was negligence or malice, I might consider contacting the other parents.

But, a kid dropped something... Your kid handed it to him... It doesn't sound like the other kid was trying to grab it or horsing around or anthing.

Your kid is responsible.

I would handle it the very same exact way I would handle if it my son, himself, actually dropped it.

No differently.

 

[bellebud]

"How was your day, honey?"
"Not great - I dropped Tommy's iphone, and the screen shattered."

Really? Do you really think this kid volunteered this information to his parents?

I was just going off the OP saying the other dad says he won't pay for it. There's certainly the chance (probably 99% chance, actually), the other kid is lying and didn't tell his dad anything, and just is saying his dad won't pay, because he doesn't want to tell the dad. Of course - he's a kid.

BUT, my point was, the other parents "should" pay - it was their kid who broke something. If kids are playing baseball in the street, and someone accidentally shatters someones car or house window, shouldn't the kid who did it pay? Sure, it's an accident. But I strongly feel we all should be responsible for our accidents. It helps us to learn to be more careful and thoughtful about life and the things we do.

As I said before though, I myself would not contact the friends parents about it asking for them to pay.

But if I were the parent of the friend and knew about it, I'd insist on paying.

 

[Coconut36]

I was just going off the OP saying the other dad says he won't pay for it. There's certainly the chance (probably 99% chance, actually), the other kid is lying and didn't tell his dad anything, and just is saying his dad won't pay, because he doesn't want to tell the dad. Of course - he's a kid.

BUT, my point was, the other parents "should" pay - it was their kid who broke something. If kids are playing baseball in the street, and someone accidentally shatters someones car or house window, shouldn't the kid who did it pay? Sure, it's an accident. But I strongly feel we all should be responsible for our accidents. It helps us to learn to be more careful and thoughtful about life and the things we do.

As I said before though, I myself would not contact the friends parents about it asking for them to pay.

But if I were the parent of the friend and knew about it, I'd insist on paying.

I strongly disagree. The kid was not supposed to lend his phone to anyone to use. He did. The consequence of that is the phone got broken and he has to find a way to pay for it himself.

I would only find the child or their parents liable if the child was being malicious or deliberate in some manner that resulted in the break. Accidents happen and it is why the kid should not have lent his expensive piece of electronics out to a friend at school in the first place. The onus is on the kid who owned the phone not the kid who had an accident. I do not see the other kid as morally or financially responsible for an accident.

What would you think the kid is lying about? A let me use his phone and I dropped it accidentally and it shattered. Why should his family cough up the money for the phone and what would the kid be lying about to the parent?

 

[Pigeon]

First, it would be a lesson to me about buying a very expensive phone for a child and allowing the child to bring it to school.

It would also be a lesson for my kid about loaning his very expensive phone to other kids.

 

[Bluestars]

Something similar happened when my son first got an iphone. A girl at school forgot her phone and asked to borrow his. After she made the call, she dropped it and the screen broke. I don't know how it is now, but at that time there was no insurance available for the iphone. We took it to the Apple store and had to pay full price to replace the phone.

We did not seek reimbursement through the girl's parents because it was an accident. We did go out and buy a very good protective cover for the iphone and haven't had any problems since then.

 

[Bluestars]

My dd has repaired at least three iPhone's with shattered glass (her aunt's phone first, then an uncles' and then a cousin's, she kept getting asked once word got out she had fixed her aunt's phone, lol.)
DD has no special knowledge but she watched a few you tube videos on how to fix them yourself and ordered a new glass off of eBay for $15 and gave it a shot. She said it was very simple. That's what I would do if I were you for your son's phone.

We thought about doing that with my son's iphone, but it will void the warranty. Now that insurance is available for the iphone, that seems like a safe way to go because the insurance will cover the phone even if it is lost. I don't know if they have changed the way iphones are made, but my brother told me at the time that my son's was broken that you had to take apart the phone to replace the screen and that is why they will give you a new one instead of just repair it at the Apple store. That's exactly what they did.

 

[Coconut36]

We thought about doing that with my son's iphone, but it will void the warranty. Now that insurance is available for the iphone, that seems like a safe way to go because the insurance will cover the phone even if it is lost. I don't know if they have changed the way iphones are made, but my brother told me at the time that my son's was broken that you had to take apart the phone to replace the screen and that is why they will give you a new one instead of just repair it at the Apple store. That's exactly what they did.

I believe you do..and something involved with the "touch" part of the screen too..I remember my friend mentioning it when he replaced his. He figured it was a loss either way and he had to pay to have it replaced or fixed so if he took it apart and it didn't work he was only out the cost of the kit (that was in his case) and it's been a year or so and the phone works great with no problems at all.

 

[donalduck]

Ya buy him another phone so he can just break that one also. This is WHY kids shouldn't have CELL PHONES,

 

[RNMOM]

I agree both boys have responsibility and perhaps should share the cost.

Just a thought, did you buy it with a credit card? My Visa has double the warrenty and will cover things like this. Really, I had game boys replaced when one was stolen and the other broken. Check out your policy.

 

[tlbwriter]

Our middle school has flex time and I am rather suprised at how many kids have the very expensive electronics and how casually they leave them laying around or let others use them. If I had a dime for every time a staff member spends time dealing with a student because they let someone else use their cell phone or ipod and forgot to get it back, I could book a really nice disney trip.

At my DD's middle school orientation, we were told that staff will NOT help you retrieve an electronic device, even if you know who has it. Maybe they got tired of the same thing.

BUT, my point was, the other parents "should" pay - it was their kid who broke something. If kids are playing baseball in the street, and someone accidentally shatters someones car or house window, shouldn't the kid who did it pay? Sure, it's an accident. But I strongly feel we all should be responsible for our accidents. It helps us to learn to be more careful and thoughtful about life and the things we do.

As I said before though, I myself would not contact the friends parents about it asking for them to pay.

But if I were the parent of the friend and knew about it, I'd insist on paying.

I agree, and I'm surprised so many people don't. If I accidentally break something of yours, I will offer to pay for it. Why is accidentally dropping your iPod different from accidentally hitting your car? If I were this kid's parent, and I knew what happened, I would at the very least offer to pay for half of the repair.

 

[Coconut36]

At my DD's middle school orientation, we were told that staff will NOT help you retrieve an electronic device, even if you know who has it. Maybe they got tired of the same thing.



I agree, and I'm surprised so many people don't. If I accidentally break something of yours, I will offer to pay for it. Why is accidentally dropping your iPod different from accidentally hitting your car? If I were this kid's parent, and I knew what happened, I would at the very least offer to pay for half of the repair.

For me personally in this situation it has to do with the fact that the kid was not supposed to let anyone use his phone but he gave it to another kid. That IMO makes the teen owner of the phone responsible because it never should have passed into the other kids hands per his parents but he broke the rule and did it anyway..thus he bears the brunt of the consequences. If he had followed the rule and not let someone use it the phone would not have been dropped.

The fact that it is accidental figures into it as well..if the kid had been deliberately careless, grabbed the phone or done something inappropriate I would find him responsible then..but he didn't. Something being broken is a risk we take when we lend out an item..I do not lend out anything that would cause an issue if broken or damaged or that I could not afford to fix/replace if it was damaged.

 

[tlbwriter]

Our middle school has flex time and I am rather suprised at how many kids have the very expensive electronics and how casually they leave them laying around or let others use them. If I had a dime for every time a staff member spends time dealing with a student because they let someone else use their cell phone or ipod and forgot to get it back, I could book a really nice disney trip.

At my DD's middle school orientation, we were told that staff will NOT help you retrieve an electronic device, even if you know who has it. Maybe they got tired of the same thing.

BUT, my point was, the other parents "should" pay - it was their kid who broke something. If kids are playing baseball in the street, and someone accidentally shatters someones car or house window, shouldn't the kid who did it pay? Sure, it's an accident. But I strongly feel we all should be responsible for our accidents. It helps us to learn to be more careful and thoughtful about life and the things we do.

As I said before though, I myself would not contact the friends parents about it asking for them to pay.

But if I were the parent of the friend and knew about it, I'd insist on paying.

I agree, and I'm surprised so many people don't. If I accidentally break something of yours, I will offer to pay for it. Why is accidentally dropping your iPod different from accidentally hitting your car? If I were this kid's parent, and I knew what happened, I would at the very least offer to pay for half of the repair.

 

[bellebud]

I strongly disagree. The kid was not supposed to lend his phone to anyone to use. He did. The consequence of that is the phone got broken and he has to find a way to pay for it himself.

I would only find the child or their parents liable if the child was being malicious or deliberate in some manner that resulted in the break. Accidents happen and it is why the kid should not have lent his expensive piece of electronics out to a friend at school in the first place. The onus is on the kid who owned the phone not the kid who had an accident. I do not see the other kid as morally or financially responsible for an accident.

What would you think the kid is lying about? A let me use his phone and I dropped it accidentally and it shattered. Why should his family cough up the money for the phone and what would the kid be lying about to the parent?

I missed the part from the OP that said her ds wasn't supposed to allow anyone else to use it. I stated in my original response, if he was told he wasn't allowed to let other people use it, it's totally his fault for not following the rules. If he was never told that, it's more of a grey area for me.

I think the other kid could be lying that he told his parents what happened. The OP stated the friends father said he won't pay for it. That means the father knows about it, which means the friend is saying he told his dad about it. It's possible the friend never even told his dad, because he doesn't want to get in trouble. I think it would be horribly wrong of the dad if his kid came home, said "I borrowed x's phone, dropped it and broke the screen, can we pay for it?" and the dad said "no". Talk about not teaching your kid responsibility for his own actions. He asked (I think) to borrow the phone, he dropped it. The responsibility is his.

 

[flower2222]

OP here -

Thanks for all your replys. I am definately going to stick with my original gut feeling and not pay for it, and I am not going to contact the other parents.
I do not even know these people. He can work to replace.

Hope you all have a nice Holiday Season.

R